Six of One: True Story of the 70's
by Jennifer10
Summary: So anyone who has read all the True Stories might recognize this. I'm editing, playing around, adding more stories and seeing if this works! I'm separating them into parts but all of them are here. This is going to be the 70's and I'm going to try and separate them up a bit. Read, review, let me know if I should continue
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note: I could not stay away! So I'm starting a new story combining all six and ironing out all the kinks. I am adding new chapters, new points of view and this is told from the point of view of a character but I'm not telling who because you have to guess although it should be obvious! I am going to have to cut these stories in half and make them shorter. So this will just be the 70's...so let's begin!**

The Six.

The Co-dependent.

The co-dependent six.

There's a store in Manhattan, right by NYU. It's called Six of One.

It had begun simply as me trying to find a perfect outfit for my thirtieth birthday and evolved into a conversation about friendship and how certain friends just change you and force you to become better or more than you ever thought you could. I began telling about my own group of friends and soon became engrossed in stories about The Infamous Six, the reason the store is called Six of One. Rachel began spilling stories from the ten years spent as being part of this magnificent group and soon I began to think how there might be a story.

"We're six halves of one whole. Six very different people with six different stories and we made one, wonderful, complete picture. We're six of one."

That's how she got the name. Six of One opened over a decade earlier as The Six were beginning to expand, when they began to form families and a ten-year chapter was coming to an end. They're now all separated with families of their own. Two of the members live in different states. Their lives are not as intertwined as they once were. Long gone are those days when they sat around drinking coffee and living life as if nothing else mattered but them. Now, they all have kids, careers, mortgages, things that are far more adult and far more pressing.

"I treasure it, I remember every single moment...it was a wonderful time. I mean, we're obviously we're all different now and-and-we have kids, families...but it was an amazing time. Those ten years, a beautiful ten years. Wonderful ups, horrible downs and...a lot of sleeping with each other," Rachel grins wildly as she let out a laugh as she plays with her wedding ring. This store, as Rachel tells it, never would have happened had she not been a member the six.

As the stories continued, she becomes distracted by a customer who keeps darting their eyes around as if hoping that they were invisible. It seemed pretty obvious what the customer is trying to pull off and it seemed obvious to Rachel as well. Rachel lets out a snort, shakes her head, mumbles something about learning from her mistakes and gets up to confront the person who seems to be ready to leave without paying for items. I watch Rachel Geller who is now forty-eight. She is strong, she is stern, she doesn't back down and she says she owes it to the other five. They made her strong.

I love watching her. She looks exactly the same. She has clearly not aged. Still as gorgeous as she was when she was 24 or 14 or even 4. She just remained the same but only on the outside.

Six of One.

The story behind each one of them seems unlikely. A very unlikely connection between six people. Four rich kids, a boy from Queens and a girl just trying to find her normal. Scarsdale, Long Island, Queens and somewhere in the Bronx. A girl who spent ten years living on the streets. A boy with connections to the mob. A brother and sister. A poor little rich boy and a poor little rich girl.

The connections were always there, random run-ins that at the time held no meaning yet clearly meant everything when it became obvious. The beginning, though, nothing seemed obvious and that's where this story begins.

The seventies. I don't appear here. I appear later and my voice will be known but now, I start. Gathering information and learning about the six who would later become the eight but even those final two additions seemed clear choices. The only two to break into the six.

Let's begin. I don't want to get too far ahead of myself. Now some of the names have been changed to protect the innocent or the guilty.

 **Joey**

 **April 1972**

Blood. Sticky blood. That's what he remembered. He told me there was blood. To be honest, I think that's how a lot of his stories begin: blood and food and also sex which is going to be very difficult for me to write about for very apparent reasons. His earliest childhood memory began at Umberto's Clam House, with his entire family. Or most of it. The Tribbiani family was...is large and has gotten larger as years have gone by. In 1972, it wasn't quite as large as it is now. His five-year-old sister, Gina was eating lasagna as he was eating the pizza that his mother had cut up for him. Yes, this is true. He does remember what everyone was eating. He really does have an amazing food memory. He also remembers his sister, Gina, who was whining. She was always whining. In addition to Gina and Joey, there was Cookie who was three and Mary Angela was two and Mary Therese who was a year old. His mom was pregnant again with another girl whom she and Joey's dad had decided to name Veronica. Joey and his siblings were very close in age. I know it seems so annoying to list everyone but I often find myself doing that so I can remember everyone. Joey was the only boy and that came with benefits, he loves to tell me about those benefits. He got his own room and his own bathroom which I find funny now because as an adult, Joey would never get his own bathroom ever again. Anyway, he was surrounded by women and as his future would dictate, he had no clue how to treat any of them. No, no, he'd learn but not until later, but now he was surrounded and he was very much the boy. He loved sports, loved getting dirty and loved food. Loved everything about food which might actually be genetic. He was eating each bite with the happiness of a child opening a Christmas gift.

"You eat like a pig, " Gina whispered.

"Oink, oink," Joey shot back.

Back then, Joey and Gina were partners in crime. They were close, making fun the way siblings do. He kept eating while his parents, Gloria and Joseph Sr., were tending to Cookie, Mary Angela and Mary Therese. Mary Therese was getting a little fussy as Gloria took her from her husband and began comforting her. Joey ignored it all, concentrating solely on that pizza. He hated when his mother cut up the pizza. He had to rearrange it to make it perfect, putting the pieces together like a puzzle. He liked an equal amount of cheese, pepperoni and sauce on each section. He was working with such precision and with an attention span foreign to most kids his age that when the gunfire went off, he barely noticed.

Bam. Bam. Bam.

Gloria and Joseph Sr., lept forward, protecting their children. Joey watched his father's arm accidentally knock Joey's plate of pizza to the ground. People were screaming as Joey knelt and crawled under the table to get to his fallen pizza. From his spot on the floor, he noticed a man slumped over in his seat and someone screaming about shooting Crazy Joe dead. Crazy Joe? A little bit of research told me that Crazy Joe was a mobster and was there celebrating his birthday. Worst. Birthday. Ever. Joey was mesmerized as he watched a woman throwing her arms around Crazy, getting covered in blood. There were screams and people running, The blood looked like tomato sauce, Joey kept munching on his pizza as he watched in amazement. The guy with his head slumped down looked hurt. He wasn't sure what was going on, it looked like a scene from a movie when suddenly he felt someone grab his arm and pull him out from under the table. His pizza abandoned and he began crying as his father held him.

"Pizza, pizza…." he kept muttering over and over as the Tribbiani family raced out the door and into the dark night. He heard the sounds of sirens speeding towards the restaurant, the blue and red lights stabbing through the blackness of the sky. He heard his parents yelling as they reached the subway station. Gloria chattering on about going to places like that and Joseph telling her to hush. On the subway, they got glares from passengers who wondered what kind of horrible parents Gloria and Joseph Tribbiani were that they could not quiet down Mary Therese, Mary Angela and Cookie who were all sobbing uncontrollably. Joey was still upset as well. His pizza was still on the floor of the restaurant. This was Joey's earliest childhood memory.

Joey's life was in constant chaos. A big home in Queens filled with sisters and people coming in and out at all hours. He loved the chaos though, he loved being surrounded by so many people. There was excitement and family and food. His mom was always cooking. Even when tending to all the small children surrounding her, there was always something baking, boiling, cooking, steaming. Something going on. Nights like the shootout in Umbertos didn't faze him in the least. It was just part of his world.

"Family is everything. Family protects you. You have each other's back so others don't shoot you in it," Joseph Senior would tell them.

It was all about family and his favorite family member, other than his sister, was his thirteen year old uncle, Tony Soprano. He wasn't sure how Tony was his uncle but he was and Joey would follow him around the neighborhood, often being the one on the look-out for whatever Tony and his friends were doing. He desperately wanted to be part of the group but Tony always told him he was too young, although it didn't stop him from asking the questions that you probably shouldn't ask a four year old.

"Did you really see Crazy Joe get his head blown off?" Tony asked, sitting on the stoop of the Tribbiani home. Tony was "babysitting" Joey and Gina which really involved him playing with the two youngsters outside and getting paid for it.

"My pizza got ruined," Joey said.

"Pizza's not better than people," Gina said.

"It was yummy," Joey said.

Joey idolized Tony. Tony was bigger and taller and even at that age, Joey knew who he wanted to be. He wanted to be Tony. Whatever Tony did, that's what he would be. Tony looked like a teddy bear. He seemed happy and was in charge. He was always in charge. Joey wanted to be in charge.

"Tony," Joseph Senior said as he and Gloria walked out of the house, Gloria holding her stomach and Joseph holding onto Mary Therese. "We made some calls, my parents will be here. Not sure. Joey and Gina, we gotta get your mom to the hospital."

"Your little sister is coming," Gloria said, running her fingers through Joey's hair.

"I don't want another sister," Joey whined.

"What's wrong with your sisters?" Gina asked.

"You're gross," Joey said.

"You're grosser," Gina said.

"Alright, Tony...do you got it?" Joseph Senior said as he guided Gloria down the steps. "My mom and dad are on their way. You won't be alone for long."

"I got it, I got it. Go. Have the baby," Tony said, motioning for the senior Joseph and Gloria to go off the hospital. Soon they left and Joey let out an annoyed sigh as Gina walked into the house.

"You alright, kid."

"I don't want another sister. All I have are sisters. It's stupid."

"Hey, you got a brother. I'm your brother."

"I thought you were Uncle Tony."

"A little of both. Look, they're family and it's all you got. Always protect family. Even if they fuck you over, you gotta be loyal."

"What does it mean to fuck someone over?"

"Oh, forgot you're four. You're actually not supposed to know that word. Come on, I'll make you a sandwich and I'm making you a promise, kid," Tony said as he stood up, Joey followed him towards the kitchen.

"What?"

"For life, kid. I'm protecting you for life. Nothing ever gonna happen to you on my watch. Got?"

"I know. Now, make me a sandwich," Joey said, hopping up onto the chair as Tony laughed and did as told. That sandwich was bigger than Joey's head and when Tony put in front of him, his eyes lit up. He wanted to be Tony, walk, talk, play...just be him. There was just no one better than Tony Soprano.

 **Phoebe**

 **February 1976**

Phoebe woke up early, it was still dark outside kind of early. She swung her legs around her bed as her feet touched the floor. She gently pressed her weight down, trying not to let the squeaky floor wake up Ursula. She slowly crept towards the door and put her hand on the doorknob. She was eight today. Eight and already she was tall for her age. Both she and Ursula were tall for their ages. Her house was creeky and topsy turvy. They had the smallest house on the block made from wood paneling and the roof was pointed. The porch was crooked, an architectural error that had never been fixed. It caused the awning to be crooked as well. It was amusing, at least to Phoebe. Their lawn was in constant need of watering and their house didn't really seem to fit but she didn't quite care. She hated houses that fit. Houses that seemed like all the other houses, her's did not and it was fine by her. I find this funny now. Very funny considering the house Phoebe lives in now. It's beautiful, it's big, it fits. I point that out to her when I visit her and she laughs, that amazing, wonderful, legendary, can be used to cure cancer laugh. She simply shakes her head and agrees that her childhood self would be appalled at what she had become: a soccer mom….but at the time, she loved that beautiful little crooked house with the dried out lawn and the creaky stairs.

Oh, those creaky stairs, they always made sounds as she made her way to the kitchen. The sink was filled with dishes, her mom had not cleaned the dishes. Lily Buffay never did the dishes though. Not since she married Jeff. Jeff was her step dad. He was tall. Super tall. Huge and he had a mustache and wore aviators and had a mullet. He always wore a tank top and jeans, it didn't matter the weather. That's just what he wore. She walked over towards the fridge and opened it, nothing there but the light but she wasn't looking for food. She closed it and opened it again, closed, open. She wished there was a way to find out, to see if the light remained on when the door closed. I would like to take this moment to step in and say that even now Phoebe wishes there was a way to find out. Anyway, back to the story, she let out a slightly annoyed snort when she was momentarily spooked by a blonde standing at her window over the sink. Leslie waved to her and held out a Tupperware container. Phoebe let out a squeal as she ran out the door and Leslie met her there. The two girls sat side by side on the porch and opened the Tupperware, Phoebe grabbed a cinnamon roll out of the container. It was gooey, warm, still warm as she took a bite.

"Oh, so good. I didn't have dinner last night," Phoebe said.

"Why didn't you eat last night?" Leslie asked.

"Oh, it's okay. My mom and step dad wanted to buy us gifts instead," Phoebe said, grinning.

"Hmmm, I bought you a present," Leslie said as she stood up and jumped off the porch steps. Phoebe followed towards the end of the driveway where a big giant box was waiting. It had a picture of a bike on it, rainbow streamers and big plastic basket in front, it was amazing, "Okay, so you know how you liked my bike?"

"Uh-huh," Phoebe said.

"I'm giving you the box," Leslie said.

"Nice," Phoebe said, truly excited.

"I know, I thought you'd like it."

"I love it although...one day, I promise you, I will get a real bike."

Now before anyone says that it can't be possible. An eight-year-old could not be this happy and this wildly optimistic, well then, I would have to point you in the direction of a Mrs. Phoebe Buffay-Hannigan, part owner of the Smelly Cat Bar and Lounge in Nashville, Tennessee. The optimism and excitement at even the smallest of things has never left. She's happy 'cause she just is.

"Oh, that would be cool. It sucks you can't have one," Leslie said.

"Makes sense. I mean, look….my mom makes like two dollars an hour and….we're not wealthy and then my step dad...well….I don't know. Cinnamon rolls are good though. "

"They're always good," Leslie said.

"I think I'd like to live in a cinnamon roll," Phoebe said.

"That would be so cool."

"Look, look….the sun," Phoebe said, pointing. She got up and ran down the concrete path to the sidewalk, she could just about make it out. The sun rising in the distance. She bit into the roll as she watched the sky turn a shade of orange. The sun rising always meant a new day. A wonderful day filled with possibilities. It didn't matter about yesterday, it never mattered about yesterday. It only mattered about today. That was the most important day of all because it was today. Sunrises are still, to this day, her most favorite thing. Now, as a wife and mom, she still gets up just to watch it. It never matters what happened yesterday when you have a today. I have stolen this as a life motto.

When she finished her cinnamon roll, she ran back into her house with a promise to Leslie that she would see her later. She wanted to go to school that day. She loved when she got to have her birthday at school. There would be treats. She ran into her house and up the stairs towards her parents' room.

"Mom, Jeff," she said pounding on the door and opening, "guys, get up."

"Oh, honey….it's so early," Jeff groaned before looking at her, "which one are you again?"

"Phoebe."

"Oh, you're the one I like," Jeff grinned.

"Honey," Lily said, smacking him. "Happy birthday, sweetie."

"Mom, we don't have any food," Phoebe said.

"I know, honey….I just got my paycheck and I had to pay some bills. I will try to get some food today, okay," Lily said.

"I'm going to the doctor today," Jeff said.

"Why?" Phoebe asked.

"Giving blood. You get money for that," Jeff said. "I want you and Ursula each to have a present and I want to buy a cake. Two cakes."

"Jeff," Phoebe said.

"Honey, we can't do two presents and two cakes. I do have to buy some groceries," Lily said.

"I think we can," Jeff said. "They only turn eight once."

"In this lifetime, come on, Jeff. I've turned eight like five times already," Phoebe said.

"Oh, you don't want gifts?" Jeff asked, grinning.

"I never said that," Phoebe said.

"Okay, okay….we will…we will get you gifts and cake," Lily said.

"But-I also need money for the school lunch," Phoebe said.

Jeff rolled over and grabbed his wallet off the nightstand and opened it, pulling out some cash and handing it to Phoebe.

"Awesome, thank you today is bagel day and they have meatless Mondays so I don't have to worry and….so cool...I'm-hey is the water turned back on so I can take a shower?" Phoebe asked.

"Yes, I paid it on Friday and they said they'd turn it on by Monday morning," Lily said.

"This is the best birthday ever," Phoebe said as she practically danced out of the room. This was gonna be fun. A great day. She practically waltzed into her room and saw Ursula sitting up. "Happy birthday, Ursula. Guess what? The water is turned back on."

"Cool," Ursula said as she got out of bed and walked towards the door.

"And Jeff said he's gonna buy two cakes so maybe we can share one and we'll leave the other out for dad," Phoebe said.

"You think he'll come this year?" Ursula asked.

"I don't know. I mean, last year, we left a plate of cookies on our birthday and he ate them all. The year before that, we left a big bowl of ice cream and it was all gone the next morning."

"I think it's Jeff doing it, not dad."

They always did that, every single year. Their dad had left when they were born but every year on their birthday, they'd leave some treats out just in case their dad came by on their birthday and every morning, the treats were gone.

"No, it's not."

"Phoebe, if it's dad then why wouldn't eat the treats and then wake us up to talk to us."

"Maybe he's Santa."

"Or maybe he's Jeff. I'm gonna get ready."

Ursula left the room. Phoebe wasn't very close with Ursula but it didn't matter. She was going to have a birthday at school and the water was turned on and she would believe that it was her dad eating those treats and not Jeff. She would always hold on to that belief. When she got her turn to shower, she spent a long time in there because she hadn't showered in a few days. She loved that shower. Phoebe also loved school. She loved learning. Where Ursula would often zone out and doodle, she was always sitting in front even though she was amongst the tallest of the second graders. She didn't care though. She practically skipped into the classroom, early which was also a plus. Her school bus was never on time but today it was.

"Mrs. Matthews," Phoebe said, running towards her second grade teacher. "Guess what I have money for lunch today and the water got turned on. It's gonna be the best birthday."

"Even better, I got cupcakes and come here," Mrs. Matthews said motioning for Phoebe to follow her to the table with the baby chicks. They were hatching them to learn about the cycle of life. Phoebe peered in the incubator and her eyes widened. The baby chicks were hatched.

"Oh my G-d," Phoebe said, staring at the little baby chicks stumbling around.

"Oh, I had that for dinner last night," Barry Goldberg said, standing next to her. He was her closest guy friend in the school.

"No you didn't," Phoebe said.

"Happy birthday, Pheebs," Barry said.

"You can tell the difference?" Phoebe asked.

"Duh, I went over to Ursula and said happy birthday and she punched me in the stomach," Barry said.

"Ursula," Mrs. Matthews said walking off towards Ursula. Phoebe looked over at her sister and shook her head. She smiled looking back at Barry. He was cute, with curly black hair and a very friendly smile.

"Pheebs, I told my mother it was your birthday and she told me she would get you a present but I have to say it's from me," Barry said.

"Barry, you didn't have to do that."

"But I did….well, my mom because….well, you know my mom is crazy."

"Your mom is sweet," Phoebe said.

Barry's mom was the definition of over protective. She was on the PTA, she was in charge of every school function. Phoebe loved her. She was so fiercely protective. So very different from her own mom.

"Okay, but here," Barry said as he reached into his pocket and pulled out a ball of tissue paper and handed it to Phoebe. She opened it and her mouth dropped. Erasers shaped like animals. Puppies, ducks, chickens, pigs, they were wonderful.

"These are so cute. Your mom is the best."

"Yeah, I said you like animals and I bought an extra chicken sandwich."

"Barry, I don't eat meat."

"You should. It's good."

"I don't eat meat. It's mean. Look how cute these animals are. How could you eat them?" Phoebe asked.

"Easy."

"You're mean," Phoebe said.

"I'm not mean, I'm hungry. Well, it's okay. I have a jelly and cream cheese sandwich too."

"How many sandwiches do you have?"

"Not enough. But you want that one?" Barry asked.

"Yeah." Phoebe said.

Soon school began and Phoebe sat away from Ursula. The two girls had very different groups of friends. Ursula wanted to fit in, she wanted to be with the popular girls, the mean girls. The girls that would trip you on the playground and announce that you were clumsy. Phoebe never liked those girls. Phoebe's friends had stories. They were funny and silly and made her laugh, especially Barry. He had discovered that she was ticklish by accident and loved to poke her, loved to crack her up especially when she was drinking milk. Barry was tall and always coming up with the best games which were completely off the wall. Crab walk stickball which including crab-walking while hitting a ball. Dodgeball Handball which was basically tag with a fancier name. So many games. Leslie was her sister, the one she would have much rather have had. Leslie was tiny but feisty. She was the spirit. She never wanted to be near the popular people. She wanted to be with the ones who had stories to tell.

"Why does she want to be friends with those girls?" Leslie asked, looking at Ursula who was standing with a group of blondes who were just staring at their nails.

"I don't know. I will never be friends with popular girls. I promise," Phoebe said.

"What's on their nails?" Barry asked.

"Fungus," Leslie said.

"Well, then I'd stare at my nails if I had fungus," Barry said.

Her birthday was fabulous, amazing and after school she got on the box with the picture of the bike while Barry and her other friend Brad pulled her along and Leslie rode her bike alongside her. It wasn't any better than that. Jeff had even gotten presents and her mom had gotten dressed and come downstairs. Jeff had enough money left over from the presents to pay for a cake and pizza. He could not afford another cake but a large pizza was even better because it would probably last longer. She could believe how wonderful the day was, so much gratitude that it didn't matter if Ursula was snippy when she cut a large slice of cake to leave out for their dad, just in case. She couldn't imagine anything better than the life she had now in her crooked little house.

Later that night, she snuck back downstairs towards the kitchen. She wanted to prove to Ursula that it was their dad that was sneaking into their house to eat cake. As she snuck down, trying so hard not to make a sound, she gasped when she saw a figure hunched over the cake.

"Dad?"

The figure turned around and her heart sank. It was Jeff and he was eating the cake. She should have known by the mullet and tank top although she hadn't seen her dad in eight years so maybe he had a mullet? No, she knew who it was. it was Jeff which meant Ursula was right. She stormed downstairs and walked towards him.

"Pheebs?"

"That cake is for my dad."

"I know," Jeff said, his voice sounding sad and tired.

She opened her mouth to speak but quickly shut it. She had always held out hope, even when faced with the harsh reality. She wanted so badly for it to be her dad but it would never be.

"You always eat the treats?"

"I'm sorry," Jeff said.

"No, no….I understand," Phoebe said as she plopped herself down in the chair, "Do you think our dad thinks about us?"

"Of course, but listen to me…..you know I'm not going anywhere, right?"

"I know. I'm so happy. It was a good birthday," Phoebe said as she tried to hold back her tears.

"Want cake?"

Phoebe nodded as Jeff grabbed some cake and two forks from the fridge. As he placed it down, Ursula appeared in the kitchen. She and Phoebe exchanged a look and simply nodded as if having a moment. She didn't want Ursula to say anything. She didn't want an 'I told you so', she wanted nothing.

"I was hoping I was wrong," Ursula whispered to her as Jeff grabbed another fork from one of the drawers.

"Maybe he had a birthday party for us...at his house," Phoebe said.

"He did," Ursula said.

Jeff handed a fork to Ursula as they sat together in the dark, eating cake. They didn't say another word to each other, there was not much else to say. They just ate and ate until they could not eat another bite. She wanted her birthdays to remain exactly like that.

 **Monica**

 **April 1976**

A babysitter taught her. That's what Monica told me when I asked. She had just turned six when she heard the noises coming from the bathroom. Her parents had gone to dinner and she was left with a sitter. She was in her room while her brother and his friends were downstairs when she heard the sounds of vomit. She jumped off her bed and walked down the hall. Even at six, she was heavy. She knew that. She was big, so jumping felt more like clomping to her. She walked towards the bathroom and saw her, Carol. Carol had been her name and she was heavy and then had gotten thin. She was leaning over the toilet, fingers in her mouth, retching violently.

"Are you sick?" Monica asked.

Carol looked up, stunned to see her there as she wiped her mouth. Carol shook her head.

"No, no, I'm fine. I just ate too much. Dieting. Sometimes when you eat too much, you have to throw up, but don't say anything. Please?" Carol asked, pleading.

Monica nodded and left the room but the image stayed. The doctors, everyone was telling her she needed to lose weight. Even at six, she was big. She wore big clothes. She was bigger than all the kids in her kindergarten class and they always made fun of her but maybe she could be like Carol. She could diet like Carol? Carol had been her sitter for her whole life and she had been big too. Then seemingly overnight, she got really tiny. Maybe that's how she did it? She wanted to be tiny like the kids in her class. She hated that people looked at her like she was gross and not cute. She wanted to be little, like the other girls.

A few days later, she found herself in the kitchen bringing a chair to the fridge and standing on it. She opened it and began eating. Deli meats, cheese, Chinese food leftovers, then she went to the freezer and there was ice cream and in the pantry, there were cookies and crackers. She kept eating until her stomach hurt and soon she went up to the bathroom and remembered what Carol had done. She leaned over and stuck her fingers down her throat. It took a few tries but soon she was throwing up. She kept pushing her fingers further down until she felt someone grab her arm. She looked up and saw her mom and tried to read the expression on her face. Was it anger? Was it confusion? She pulled Monica out of the bathroom and into her bedroom where she immediately began to spank her. Monica wasn't sure why she was getting a spanking? Maybe that's why Carol was so secretive about it? She cried as her mom continued to spank her. She was so confused. Her mom would always try to get her to lose weight and she was trying and she was getting in trouble for it. Soon, Judy stood Monica infront of her and stared at her with a scary look in her eye.

"I don't ever want to see you do that again. Never."

Monica nodded as Judy left but she was more confused than ever. It worked for Carol. Maybe that was a good diet. The next morning, she walked back into the bathroom and stood on the white thing with the numbers, the scale. She couldn't quite figure out the scale but she knew the number looked smaller than it had the day before. She didn't understand why her mom was mad. Her weight went down which was what her mom wanted. Maybe she just had to make sure mom didn't see it. Maybe it was because it was a grown up diet? She would have to try it again but maybe at a different time when her mom wasn't there.

She had a moment a few days later when her parents went out again. Carol was babysitting again and again Monica went to the fridge. Carol was on the phone with her boyfriend so Monica began eating anything she could get her hands on. Soon, she felt full. She felt sick and ran up to the bathroom. She did it the first try and she felt kind of happy. It did hurt though, her throat felt sore so maybe it wasn't something she could do a lot but everyone once in awhile? Maybe if she was tiny, things would be better for her.


	2. Chapter 2

**Now, I hope you're enjoying this. I'm showing new parts of their stories and going a little deeper. Please read and review.**

 **Chandler**

 **June 1976**

He was sitting in a darkened AMC movie theater, his dad sitting next to him, he didn't care that he was too young. Some might say taking a seven-year-old to see All the President's Men might be inappropriate but those people weren't there so he didn't have to listen to them. He was with his dad and this was his favorite outing.

"After this," Charles Bing whispered, "we will sneak across the way and we'll watch Bad News Bears."

"Yes, yes, I want to see that. Hey, dad…..where's the water?"

"What?"

"I keep hearing about water gates in this movie but there's no water and no gate?"

"Watergate is the name of the hotel. Nixon is a crook. That's really all you have to know."

"Okay. Wow, this is so cool. I am so not old enough to see this movie."

"No, you are not but you know, something for me and then Bad News Bears for you. It's a trade-off."

"Yep."

Chandler kept his eyes glued to the screen, trying to figure out what was going on. He wasn't quite sure but it didn't matter. His dad handed him a box of Junior Mints which he ripped open and began eating. This was his favorite part of his movie days with his dad. It was all so much fun.

As soon as the ending credits began scrolling on the screen, Charles motioned for Chandler to follow him. He remained a few steps behind as father and son exited the theater. Chandler kept following him towards another theater playing Bad News Bears. Charles glanced around and quickly ducked inside. Chandler giggled a little as he followed him. They took their seats, a double feature and this movie was a little more his style. Bad News Bears. His eyes were glued to the screen, his favorite was Walter Matthau. He loved that character, he drank a lot and seemed fun. He also had the best name: Morris Buttermaker. He laughed every single time he thought about it.

When the lights came on, though, he stopped laughing when he realized he was actually alone. His dad was not with him. He had been so caught up in the movie that he had not realized and now there he was, alone. He looked around and saw Charles at the back, his arm around some man he had never met. They were kissing which Chandler thought was a little strange but it happened a lot, every single double feature they did together led to this moment where Charles would tell Chandler he had to use the restroom during the movie Chandler had chosen, the lights would come up and Charles would be somewhere else. Chandler let out a sigh as he got up and walked towards the back of the theater.

"Dad?"

"Oh, Chandler….did you like it?" Charles asked.

"Yeah, I think I want to be Morris Buttermaker when I grow up."

"An alcoholic minor league baseball coach? That is something all children should aspire to," the man sitting next to his father said.

"So Dad, you wanna go home?"

"You know, I'm kinda busy….here," Charles reached into his pocket and pulled o=out his wallet, handing Chandler three hundred dollars. "You can get home, right?"

"Always do," Chandler said.

"Good kid," the man said.

"The best."

Chandler smiled as he walked out of the theater. The theater was in White Plains, an hour walk back to his home in Scarsdale. He had made this trek so many times before and knew exactly how to get home and what stops he would make. He really wasn't afraid and there were so many people along the way that he could talk to that it didn't even occur to him to be scared. First, there was the Dunkin' Donuts where he'd get himself three or four dozen doughnuts, almost one dozen of which he ate himself. It was an almost three-mile walk so he needed snacks. He would pass restaurants and bars where the bouncers would smile and wave at him as he walked by. He would sometimes offer them doughnuts but they would never let him in the bars. He so badly wanted to go inside those places. They seemed so important that someone had to stand outside and guard them from kids. The men that stood outside those places told him that he could not enter until he was twenty-one which he found sad.

When he finally reached the Schnurmacher Center, he stopped inside. It was a retirement center he had discovered once on his way home from the movies once. He had seen some older people playing outside and thought he'd get to know them. He walked in and was immediately greeted by Abby, a curly red head with an impossibly white smile.

"Hey, Abby."

"Chandler….coming back?"

"Yeah, I saw All the President's Men and Bad News Bears but then my dad hooked up with a guy and well, you know," Chandler said.

"You shouldn't be telling me these things."

"I know….but why does dad like to hang out with guys if he's married to my mom?"

"Let me take you into the rec room," Abby said, avoiding the topic as she ushered Chandler into a room where there were people far older than he was, playing cards, listening to music. It was a sea of white hair and wrinkles. Abby announced his arrival as she always did and he passed out doughnuts. Some, not all. He was called, "The Doughnut Kid". He kinda liked it. Especially loved being around people so happy to see him and he especially loved the stories. Those were even better. Stories about relationships, games, music, it was an amazing world from a long time ago that he kinda wished he belonged to.

"It seems so happy then," Chandler said as he munched on a chocolate doughnut with a guy who looked a lot like Morris Buttermaker.

"It's always better now because it's now. So kid, what grade you in?" Morris Buttermaker asked.

"I just finished first. I'm going into second. I told you that last time."

"I'm old. My mind is going. But what's a first-grade graduate walking alone for?"

Chandler laughed, they had this conversation every single time. The older people could not believe that he was so young and all by himself. He thought it was kinda cool and never quite understood why people were concerned. It all seemed relatively normal to him.

"I know what I'm doing. I even know how to count money. I got three hundred dollars. I'm not stupid. I turned seven in April."

"I didn't say you were. What did you do for your birthday?"

"Dance party. My mom and dad invited all their friends."

"What about your friends?"

"Their moms and dads don't let them come for dance parties. But it's fun because they have bubbles. Remember you told me the boat story?" Chandler asked, he wanted to hear more about Morris. He didn't want to talk about his birthday.

"Yeah."

"Can you tell it again?" Chandler asked, he loved the boat story. Morris told it so well.

"It's not a happy story."

"It sounds cool. I mean, a big giant boat hit ice and sunk. How cool? I bet there's treasure and pirates and-"

"People died."

"That's not good."

"Nope," the old man said, placing his hand on Chandler's shoulder as they ate their doughnuts. The old man told the story again about how when he was in his twenties, he was on a boat called the Titanic. Chandler sat on the edge of his seat, his feet barely touching the floor as he listened with the same intensity that he watched the movies. As the story got good, he began to hear some familiar chords. Barbra Streisand's "The Way We Were" began playing and he glanced over at an older lady walking towards them with a smile.

"Hey, where's my grandson," the older woman said grinning at him, "this is our song."

Chandler jumped off the chair and walked towards the older woman wearing a floral gown. No, it was not his grandmother but it didn't matter. She was like a mother to him or a grandmother and every time he came, he would dance with her to old people music. Barry Manilow or Barbra Streisand, it didn't matter. He'd stand on her feet and she would sway back and forth.

"Barbra Streisand," Chandler said.

"Very good," the lady said.

It was a highlight, his highlight. There was something so wonderful about being there with these people. Something so warming to him. He forgot about his home, his school, his different kind of a life. He felt he belonged.

When he left the Schnurmacher Center, he continued walking until he ended up at George Field Park. After seeing Bad News Bears, he had been desperate. He wanted to play some ball. He walked towards the baseball stadium and saw some kids around his age. He never got to play sports with his parents so loved when he got the chance.

"Chandler," a boy about his age ran towards him. "You wanna play?"

Chandler nodded and stuffed one of the last remaining doughnuts in his mouth. He ran over to the field and began playing, running, working off the doughnuts he had eaten. He played for about an hour or so before walking the rest of the way home.

Once home, he grabbed his tennis racket from his room, headed outside to his tennis courts and spent the remainder of the daylight hours hitting a ball against a wall until he was called inside and downstairs towards the club. He sat in one of the booths as he watched his father with the guy from the movies and watched his mom grind up against a guy he didn't know. He liked listening to the music and the bubbles were cool but there were always so many people that it became ridiculously packed. So he would sit and think about the day, listen to the music and let it take over him. He never understood why people questioned him, why they seemed concerned? It was his life. His world. It was just different.

 **Joey**

 **August 1976**

It was now summer of '76, the summer before third grade. It was hot and sticky in Queens, New York and he was riding his dirt bike on the street with his cousin Christopher who was a younger than him, as well as Tony and his buddies, Artie, Davey, Sal and Blundetto. Joey and Christopher were incredibly close and both shared an agreement that it was unbelievably cool that a group of sixteen and seventeen-year-old boys let an eight-year-old and a seven-year-old hang out with them. They were just referred to as "the kids".

"I'm so bored," Artie whined as he tried to do a wheelie on his bike, but fell off instead which caused laughter from the rest of the group.

"We can ride our dirt bikes in Cunningham Park. My dad took me there," Joey said. "It's so cool. I rode my bike over one of the jumps and it was like a hundred feet in the air."

"That's bullshit," Blundetto said.

"Yeah, that's too high of a number kid," Tony said.

"It was still high," Joey said.

"Not that high," Tony said. "It's too far to ride all the way out there in this heat."

"We gotta do something, this is bullshit," Blundetto said.

"Is that your new favorite word?" Tony said.

"Yeah, asshole," Blundetto said.

The group laughed again as Joey and Christopher leaned in excitedly to hear what plans the boys might come up with. Nothing would thrill him more than being part of this club, this gang of boys. Soon, the idea was come up with to ride to the drugstore. Tony was talking about this girl he was crushing on, Carmela. They rode their bikes down towards the Hollis Drugstore with Tony going on and on about what he could get Carmela.

"You know what we could do?" Christopher whispered to Joey as the older boys were arguing over what would be a better gift. Christopher and Joey were sticking with the candy aisle.

"What?" Joey asked.

"Chocolate."

"I don't have money," Joey said.

"You don't need money. Watch," Christopher said as he looked around the store and quickly grabbed about six Snickers bars from a box and shoved them into his fanny pack. Joey's mouth dropped as he looked over at the older gentleman behind the counter who looked to be in his own world.

"Whoa," Joey said.

"I'm a full year younger than you and even I know this shit," Christopher said.

"I don't think I can."

"Pussy," Christopher said as he walked off towards Tony and the other boys. Joey stared at the rows of candy bars. His heart beat wildly as he looked over at Christopher talking to them, laughing. They peered into his fanny pack. Joey didn't want to be outdone. He reached forward and wrapped his fingers around a Butterfinger.

"Hey, what are you kids doing?" The man behind the counter screamed. Joey jumped about twenty feet in the air and turned towards the guy who was screaming at Tony, Christopher and the rest of the guys. The group started laughing.

"Fuck off, old man," Tony yelled back as the group ran towards the door. Joey dropped the Butterfinger and ran after them as they grabbed their bikes and rode quickly down the street, still laughing. They rode so fast and so long, they did end up at Cunningham but instead of riding the dirt bike trails, they shared their loot. Christopher handed out the candy bars to the older boys who seemed amazed by him and Tony showed them the necklace he had stolen for Carmela. They were laughing and Joey felt increasingly left out.

"What did you get, Little Joe?" Artie asked.

"Joey was a pussy," Christopher said.

"I'm not...I just-I didn't-" Joey said.

"It's alright, it's alright. Lay off the kid," Tony said.

"Still a pussy," Christopher said.

Joey shoved Christopher, hard. Christopher shoved back but Joey weighed more and could hit harder. Tony had to get between them and separate them.

"Hey, hey….we're family. Family doesn't hurt family," Tony said. Joey and Christopher stopped fighting but it didn't matter, Joey was still pissed off.

The next day, he rode back to the drugstore. He'd do it this time. He wouldn't chicken out. He would actually do what needed to be done. He was older than Christopher, smarter. He could do this. Christopher was an idiot, showing his loot while in the store. Idiot. Joey walked into the store and walked towards the rows of candy bars. He took a deep breath and reached towards the Butterfinger. He grabbed it and immediately stuffed it in the fanny pack he had for this moment. He looked back and the old man behind the counter who wasn't looking at him. So Joey turned back and decided to keep going, he could have left but he wanted more candy, one after the other. He kept throwing them into his fanny pack when he was pulled back and suddenly turned around where he looked up into the eyes of the old man. Joey's breath got caught in his throat. He couldn't find it in him to speak.

His father was called and Joseph Senior looked pissed as he sat next to Joey in a tiny windowless office. The old man whom Joey learned was called, Gus, kept talking about Joey and his friends and how they kept ripping him off. Joey felt scared but kept thinking of Tony. He thought of what Tony had said the previous day. Tony had no fear, Christopher had no fear. He shouldn't have fear either.

"Fuck off, old man," he heard himself say. It sounded like it was coming somewhere else. The room went silent.

"Excuse me?" Gus said.

"What did you just say?" Joseph Senior said.

"Fuck off, old man. Maybe-maybe you shouldn't make your stuff so easy to grab," Joey said, pretty sure his voice was shaking and he was trying to hide his hands so his dad and Gus wouldn't see the trembling. "Fuck off, old man."

His eyes closed when he felt his dad grab his arm and pull him over his lap. He knew what was coming and he kept his eyes shut as his father spanked him, hard. He didn't cry, he knew he deserved it but his dad didn't get it. When he was done getting spanked, his father stood up, grabbed Joey's arm and pulled him out of the store. Gus telling him that he and his friends were no longer allowed in the store. As they left, though, Joey reached out and grabbed another candy bar without his dad or Gus noticing and stuffed it in his fanny pack.

When they got back, his mother stormed towards him, grabbed his arm and marched him towards the kitchen where his mother began spanking him as well. It was then that he began to cry. Joey always cried when his mother got mad. When she was done, he stood crying and sniffling. He felt horrible.

"I didn't raise a thief," Gloria said, shaking her finger at him.

"I'm sorry," Joey said.

"You know what it is? It's Tony and his friends," Gloria said as Joseph Senior walked towards them and opened the fridge, "I don't-"

"It's not Tony. He was there alone," Joseph Senior said.

"They stole a bunch of stuff yesterday and Christopher called me a pussy and I shoved him," Joey said, sniffling.

"I don't like you hanging out with these boys," Gloria said.

"You keep giving me stupid sisters," Joey said.

Gloria gave him a look and shook her head.

"You want something to eat?" Gloria asked.

"Yeah," Joey said as Gloria went to start to making him some lasagna. Joey walked towards the table and sat. He hated getting in trouble with his parents. He especially hated getting in trouble with his mom.

"You know, Junior," Joseph said, sitting next to him. "Just 'cause the other kids are doing stuff like that, doesn't mean you should."

"Can I go dirt biking?" Joey asked. "When my ass feels better."

"Language, Joe," Gloria said.

"Sorry, I'm sorry," Joey said.

"And no dirt biking today. Today, you stay home," Gloria said.

"But-"

"Listen to your mom," Joseph Senior said as he patted Joey's hand. He hated that he wouldn't be able to ride but also felt incredibly guilty. He couldn't believe he had tried stealing and he had a chocolate bar in his fanny pack. He needed to give it back to Gus.

The next morning, he rode his bike again towards the store. As he soon as he walked in, Gus started yelling at him to leave.

"Wait, wait," Joey said as Gus reached towards the phone. Joey reached into the fanny pack and pulled out the candy bar and placed it on the counter. "This is yours and-and-I wanted to say sorry. I am-I'm sorry."

Gus stared at him, he looked so angry. Joey bowed his head. he felt so bad.

"Keep it," Gus said.

"What?" Joey asked, looking up at him. Gus' face changed from anger to concern. Joey watched as Gus reached under the counter and pulled out a box of Snickers bars.

"I haven't stacked these yet and bought too many this month. Here and when your friends ask, you stole 'em. I won't tell," Gus said.

"Why?"

"I was your age once too. But between you and me, kid. You're better than those hooligans you hang out with."

"Thank you," Joey said as he grabbed the candy bars and put them in his fanny pack. He nodded at Gus, left the store and rode back. When he got back home, he noticed the boys all riding around in front of his house. He grinned wildly as he rode towards them.

"Where the hell have you been pussy?" Christopher asked as Joey rode towards them and stopped, the boys surrounding him. He opened up his fanny pack and handed out the candy bars.

"Took 'em this morning. Who's a pussy now, asshole," Joey said.

"Whoa, nice loot," Blundetto said.

"I underestimated you, Tribbiani," Sal said.

"You took 'em," Tony said as he examined the Butterfinger in his hands.

"Yeah, of course. Now can we go to Cunningham. I wanna ride the dirt trails."

"Alright, but if I fall, I'm sticking a Snickers up your ass," Artie said.

"Fine, there's a lot of room up there," Joey shot back.

"And he'll just take it out of his ass and eat it anyway," Tony said.

"Yeah," Joey said, "now let's go."

Joey began riding and soon the other boys followed. He was officially part of their group. They didn't have to know the truth.

Once they arrived at Cunningham, they rode the trails. He loved dirt biking, going up and down the trails, getting dirty and practicing tricks. He could do it all day. He rode up to the top of a pile of dirt and got ready to ride when Tony appeared next to him.

"You didn't steal those bars, did you?" Tony asked.

"I did."

"I'm not telling the others, kid," Tony said.

Joey let out a sigh. He didn't want Tony to be upset with him. He didn't want Christopher to call him names.

"I tried yesterday but I got caught so...but I took one on my way out and then….I returned it and the Old Guy gave me candy bars."

"Okay."

"I don't know, Tony. I-"

"Hey, hey...it's alright. We've all got our skills and you know I'm not doing this shit," Tony said, motioning towards the dirt jump.

"Come on, I'm eight and I'm doing this. Don't be a sissy shit," Joey said, giving him a look, quickly getting into his favorite role as the obnoxious kid brother. Joey was still quite a few years younger than him and he knew that Tony liked him and because of that, sometimes taking advantage was necessary.

"Did you just call me a sissy shit?" Tony asked.

Joey simply smiled and began riding down the jump. He could hear Tony yelling and riding behind him. It was those moments he loved, riding around in the dirt, getting messed up and lying in the grass completely covered in mud. It didn't matter that he didn't technically steal anything. It was a rare feeling of euphoria to play with the big boys. This would always be more fun than school.

When he started third grade that fall, his teachers were strict and he would constantly stare off, wanting to do other things. He was constantly not understanding and overheard a teacher tell another teacher that Joey was simply a lost cause because he could not understand a word problem. It wasn't that he didn't understand, it was that he just did not care. Why did he need to know how many apples were left when you subtracted or how to find the verbs or what have you. He simply did not care. He cared about playing and the TA they had for the third grade that year. She was was brunette and wore sweaters that did very little to cover her figure. Her name was Brittani.

"You're staring at Brittani's boobies," Kristi poked him with a pencil. He giggled looking at his friend, sitting beside him. He and Kristi had been seated next to each other since kindergarten and were always paired together. Their last names were closer. He was Tribbiani, she was Tribboinio so they were always together and had a tight bond already.

"I'm not."

"You are."

"They're big."

"So? You're gross."

"It's what helps me learn," Joey said.

"Do you understand, Joey," Brittani said as she walked over to him to look at his unfinished word problems. His eyes widened as he stared at Brittani's chest.

"I understand," Joey said which elicited giggles from his table.

"Eyes on your paper, Joey," Brittani said.

"Yep."

Brittani let out an annoyed sigh and walked away, towards the teacher. Joey watched as Brittani talked with the teacher and began pointing at him.

"Joseph, come here for a second," The teacher motioned for him to approach her. He rolled his eyes as he walked towards her.

"Yes, Mrs. Goodman," Joey said.

"Stop staring. You are here to learn," Mrs. Goodman said.

"I am learning," Joey said.

"Right now, you need to do math."

"But won't I learn more staring at boobies than figuring out how many peaches Bob gets after he sells eleven?" Joey asked.

"You want to go to the principal's office? Remember what Principal Wolfman said? If I have to send you there one more time, you're getting a suspension."

"Okay," Joey said as he walked back to his table and sat down, annoyed. School had just begun and he had already been sent to the principal's office at least four times. He hated school, it was boring. He wanted to be out playing. He would just have to become better at looking at girls. He'd become better at hiding it. It wouldn't be that hard. Maybe that could be his skill? Being with girls? He liked looking at them and when he played, all the girls seemed to chase him. Even his sisters would complain about some of their female classmates having crushes on Joey so maybe his skill would never be stealing, but instead the girls.

 **Phoebe**

 **September 1976**

She was pacing back and forth, sitting with Leslie in her garage. Leslie had a guitar on her lap but Phoebe was not paying attention. She was worried. Barry and Brad were supposed to be there already. They were supposed to help them with the band they were forming and they were late.

"They will be here, don't worry. Wait, how's this, " Leslie took a deep breath and began to sing, "today, I am eight and next year I will be nine and that's how things go with time."

"Nice," Phoebe said.

"I know. Right?"

"Oh, there they are," Phoebe said as she raced down her driveway. Barry looked like he had been punched and Brad looked very dejected. Barry wouldn't even look at her. "What is going on?"

"I did a bad thing," Barry said.

"Did you eat the fuzzy mints from Morty's Diner again? You know they don't taste like you're licking a kitty," Phoebe said.

"He passed Ursula a note asking her if she liked him and she laughed really hard," Brad said.

"What?" Phoebe asked. "Barry, look at me."

"I can't. I can't look at someone who likes Ursula."

"Ursula is evil. You know that. You know she broke my Judy Jetson thermos," Phoebe said.

"It was the saddest funeral I've ever gone to," Brad said.

"I know. So sad. Come on. Leslie, we're gonna visit Judy," Phoebe yelled.

"We have band practice," Leslie said.

"I know, we just have to visit Judy really quick."

Leslie let out a groan and put the guitar down. Phoebe turned towards Barry and held out her hand. He reluctantly grabbed it as she pulled him off to the side of her house. There were was a popsicle stick sticking out of a lump of dirt on the ground where the Judy Jetson thermos had been buried. Barry let out a sigh.

"Rest in Peace, Judy," Barry said.

"She killed Judy Jetson. Why?" Phoebe asked.

"I'm sorry," Barry said.

"It's fine. You'll know better next time," Phoebe said.

"We need to put this in a song," Brad said.

"That's what I've been saying," Leslie said. "Judy Jetson Thermos Killer. Judy Jetson-"

"She was killed by a thrilla," Brad said.

"She was run over by a bus," Leslie said.

"How about Judy Jetson Thermos Killer, the bus was so heavy it killed her?" Brad asked.

"Guys, be a little nicer. There's a dead woman," Phoebe said, pointing to the grave.

"It's a thermos," Barry said.

"Spirit of the thermos," Phoebe said.

Barry nodded as they stood for a bit longer before returning to the garage to practice playing. She would have to talk to Ursula. She hated that Ursula was mean to her friends. She never spoke to Ursula's friends.

After Brad, Leslie and Barry left, Phoebe stepped inside her house and towards the kitchen. She grabbed some cookies from the pantry and made her way up to her mom's room. Her mom had been in bed all day again, she was sick.

"Mom?" Phoebe asked as she got in bed with her.

"Sweetie. Ursula?"

"Phoebe. Mom you should really know the difference."

"I know."

"I brought cookies. Did you eat today?"

"No, I wasn't hungry."

"Mom, it's almost dinner time. Here, eat cookies."

"No, I don't-"

"Eat something. Please? You have to. Ursula was mean to me again."

"Ignore her."

Phoebe nodded as she opened the box and fed her mom a chocolate chip cookie. She let out a sigh as her mom began to cry as she chewed slowly.

"I'm a horrible mom. I've fucked everything up."

"No, no...you're a great mom. I wouldn't trade you for anything."

Phoebe reached over and grabbed a box of kleenex and began wiping her mom's tears as Ursula appeared in the room.

"She sick again?" Ursula asked.

"Yeah. She hasn't eaten today and...mom, did you shower?"

"No, I didn't feel like it."

Ursula walked in and sat next to Phoebe on the bed. She reached into the box of cookies and handed another one to her.

"Why were you mean to Barry?" Phoebe asked.

"'Cause he's a dork," Ursula said.

"I'm not mean to your friends."

"They hate you."

"I don't care."

"I'm hungry," Ursula said.

"I didn't eat lunch today either," Phoebe said. "Jeff said he's getting paid so I think we'll be able to have money for lunch tomorrow."

"I hope so. Mom, why are you sick again?" Ursula asked.

"I'm horrible. I just….fail at everything."

"You don't. You're beautiful and it's such a wonderful fall day. Don't you want to be out in it?" Phoebe asked.

"Why are you so happy?" Ursula asked.

"I have to be. Mom, have another cookie," Phoebe said as the two girls continued to feed their mom who lay there, tears streaming down her face. Phoebe hated when her mom was like that. She wished her mom could be happy. There was so much to be happy about. She reached into the box and absent mindedly ate a cookie. Her stomach was growling. She handed one to Ursula as well, figuring if she was hungry, Ursula probably was to. They would have lunch tomorrow and she would be happy about that. She had that to look forward to.


	3. Chapter 3

The Gellers and the Greens. Beginning in 1976, these two families overlapped. Rachel explained it as we sat in her store, going over inventory and making budgeted lists of things she would need to order. That was when it all truly began. September of 1976. That was when The Six truly started or at least half of that six. The brother and sister and the girl, well, she didn't live quite next door but it was close enough. It was the fall of 1976. That's when one half of The Six truly began except there was no way of knowing that at the time.

"I was kicked out of kindergarten for being a bitch," Rachel grinned, she was sorting through a box of tops that had been delivered as she said this. It made her laugh although I know she didn't find it funny at the time. She had to go to a new school. She had punched someone. That had been the last straw. Someone had said she was mean so she punched them, she knew that. This had been her final infraction. She had a reputation at age five. She wasn't really sure the specifics of why this particular person called her mean or even where that reputation started although when I asked the others, they had all had one response:

"Someone popular probably told her to do something she actually didn't want to do but she did it anyway because she didn't want anyone to be mad at her and then she ended up getting screwed for it."

When I brought this theory back to Rachel, she laughed. It probably was true, she said. For the first twenty four years of her life, it was a pattern. She was a middle child and maybe that had something to do with it. She was never sure. She had been called a bully in kindergarten. She hated being called a bully. She thought it was a word that even then did not fit her but no one would call her anything else. She remembered her parents being angry and pulling her and her older sister Amy out of the school they were already in. They were sent to a new school, an elementary school in Long Island which was close to their home and that was how she was brought into the lives of the Gellers.

"There's a lot of overlap in our stories," Monica told me when I met with her at her house. "Especially, with Ross, Rachel and I."

She's right.

There's a ton of overlap so I may have to do things differently here. Three different points of view yet the same childhood stories.

 **September 1976**

Six year old Rachel Green snuck into the kitchen and looked around. She noticed that the housekeepers were not there so she went to work. She grabbed a bowl of sugar off the table, walked towards the trash and dumped the sugar in the trash. She walked into the pantry and pulled a blue container that she knew was salt. She poured the salt into the ceramic bowl and placed the bowl on the table. She then ran back to her bedroom and proceeded to get ready for first grade. She looked at herself in the mirror and smiled. She was wearing a denim dress with red triangles on it. She wore a long sleeve red top under it and red tights and her red Mary Janes. She put her long brown hair in pigtails. She was so happy that her mother let her dress herself. She was good at that.

"Girls, breakfast!" Rachel's mother yelled from downstairs. Rachel grabbed her red backpack and walked downstairs. She was the middle child. Her sister Amy was nine and her sister Jill was three. As she took her spot at the table between Amy and Jill, she noticed her mother picking up the ceramic bowl that she had filled with salt. She watched as her mother took several spoonfuls of salt out of the bowl and put it in her coffee and stirred. After taking a drink, her mom spit out her coffee and started hacking. She looked angrily at both Amy and Rachel.

"Who put salt in my coffee?" Sandra Green asked.

"Amy," Rachel spoke up. Amy's mouth dropped opened. She always blamed Amy.

"No, I didn't. You're lying. Mom she's lying," Amy yelled.

She rarely ever got caught for her pranks and her sisters often got in trouble for her. It was a perk of being a middle child, she thought...an absolute perk.

"Amy, go to your room," Sandra said. "This is not how we are starting the first day of school."

"But she's lying. She's always lying," Amy cried.

"Go to your room until it's time to go," Sandra said pointing towards the stairs. Amy let out a huff and stormed off towards her room.

"I'm not lying mommy," Rachel grinned.

"I know," Sandra said, giving Rachel a kiss on the head. She loved how her mother always believed her. Despite this victory, she was nervous. She was starting a new school. She hated her kindergarten. She was always in trouble there and her parents yelled at the principal. Her mom didn't believe that Rachel had done anything wrong and her dad argued that the teacher should be fired. So they pulled her out and took her to a new school. They pulled out Amy as well which Amy hated. The entire car ride to school Amy complained.

"I don't know why I had to switch schools because Rachel is a bad kid," Amy said.

"I am not," Rachel said.

"Your sister is not bad. They just didn't understand her," Sandra said.

"She cut a girl's hair off," Amy remarked.

"Because it was frizzy," Rachel said.

"And fingerpainted a boy's outfit," Amy said.

"It was a boring outfit. It needed color," Rachel said.

"They didn't understand your creativity," Sandra said.

Amy rolled her eyes and Rachel gave her a smug look. She spent the rest of the car ride to school playing with Jill in her carseat. She loved Jill far more than Amy. Jill was sweet and kind. Amy was just mean. She always thought if anyone should be the bad kid, it should be Amy.

Once at the school, the principal walked Rachel to her new classroom. It was a big classroom with a colorful carpet in the middle, brightly lit and there were bins of toys everywhere. Her new teacher, Mrs. Gold approached her. She was wearing a long dress and a white turtleneck. She was bony and her hair was in a tight bun.

"Hello, I'm Mrs. Gold. I'm your first grade teacher. What's your name?"

"Rachel. That's an ugly outfit. I wouldn't wear it."

Mrs. Gold looked at the principal who let out an uncomfortable laugh.

"According to her mother, she's a bit a fashionista," the principal said.

"Oh, I see," Mrs. Gold said before leaning into Rachel, "honey, that's not a very nice thing to say. Only nice words in the classroom."

"But that is nice?" Rachel asked. She had been so confused. She thought she was just being honest, the outfit was ugly and she thought someone would want to know. Instead, Mrs. Gold walked her towards a girl with dark hair divided into two pigtails. Monica would tell me later that she did it herself. She would carefully divide her hair into pigtails and use her fingers to curl each end. Monica's eyes were crystal blue and skin pale white. Rachel said later, Monica looked like Snow White. Monica sat in the corner of her first grade classroom, holding a doll, whom she had named Emma. There were children laughing behind her. They were playing games, talking about stuff six year olds talk about but none of that interested Monica, she was interested only in making sure Emma was comfortable. Monica told me that was her most favorite thing in the world….playing with those dolls. She never had to worry. She had found a pink blanket and wrapped the baby doll up and rocked her in her arms. She carefully ran her fingers through the doll's brownish hair. "I think I spent every free moment I had playing with the dolls in the classroom," Monica said. "It just felt so relaxing to take care of them. It helped me escape and I didn't have to worry about the mean kids in class."

"Go sleep, Emma," Monica whispered gently. "Go sleep, now."

"Monica."

She looked up at the tall skinny woman known as Mrs. Gold who looked nothing like gold. She was bony, looking like jagged puzzle pieces that someone had jammed together. She was pointy in all the wrong places. When I told Monica what Rachel had said about Mrs. Gold's fashion choices, she laughed and said she could picture it and she could also vividly remember Rachel as she stood next to Mrs. Gold. Rachel had long brown hair, was skinny as well and looked to be a very pretty girl with a very prominent looking nose that looked way too prominent to be on the tiny featured face of a six year old. Rachel laughed when I told her this and immediately called Monica out on her dig that Rachel had a big nose. Monica had no apologies.

"Yes, Mrs. Gold," Monica said.

"We have a new student today...and I was wondering if you would like to play with her and make her feel welcome?" Mrs. Gold asked.

"Okay. Hi, I'm Monica," she said looking at the girl standing next to Mrs. Gold who was staring straight at Monica.

"I'm Rachel."

"Hi, Rachel. You wanna play with me?"

"Okay."

That was their first meeting. Both women are still friends and after reliving this story, I wondered if Mrs. Gold was still around. Unfortunately, she had passed away in 2011 at about ninety years old but they both give her credit. Despite her being bony and poorly dressed, she was the one who decided that Monica needed a friend as did Rachel.

"Rachel, Monica will be a good friend to you and she'll make you feel right at home," Mrs. Gold said as she gently pushed Rachel forward. Monica watched in anticipation as Mrs. Gold walked off, leaving Rachel standing there in front of her.

"Do you like babies?" Monica asked, that was always how she began friendships.

"Yeah. I have a sister who's three."

"Oh. I have a brother. He's six and in the second grade. His birthday is in October and mine is in August and sometimes we have the same age."

Ross and Monica's birthdates have always been strange and weird. From what I gather now, Ross was born in October of 1969 and Monica was in August of 1970. A ten month age difference. Judy Geller basically spent the from January 1969 to August of 1970, pregnant. Impressive, although when I asked Judy, she disagreed. She told me how miserable she was. She and Jack had not thought they could have children and suddenly came one right after the other. She didn't even have a chance to catch her breath with the first baby when she realized she was pregnant with a second child. "That's weird."

"That's weird," Rachel said.

"I know. Do you only have one sister?"

"No. I have an older sister. She's nine."

"Oh."

"What's her name?" Rachel asked, pointing at the doll in Monica's arms. Rachel knelt down next to her and peered at the wrapped up bundle.

"Emma. When I have a daughter, I'm gonna name her Emma."

"That's pretty."

"What are you gonna name your children?" Monica asked.

"I'm six. I am a children."

"When you're a grown up."

"Oh.. I don't know but my mommy told me once that it's better to marry someone who has lots and lots of money and then you can buy children," Rachel said. Her mom taught her a lot of strange things. Rachel thought at the time how bizarre it was that Monica wanted children and age six but maybe in retrospect, it wasn't so strange at all.

"You can buy children?" Monica asked.

"Yeah, on an island right by Kentucky," Rachel said although she has no clue where that idea came from. Maybe a movie or something.

"Wow. No, I don't wanna buy my children. I wanna have a billion of them."

"That's a lot."

"I know...and I'm gonna have a really cute husband, too. His name is Matthew."

"You've named your husband?"

"Of course. You have to plan for these things, Rachel. You can't just let it happen. My mommy said that only crazy people let things happen," Monica explained, her eyes widening, "okay, Emma's finally asleep." Monica stood up and walked towards a tiny plastic, pink crib and placed Emma in it. She placed a blanket over her and stroked her hair, leaning in to kiss the doll on the head before looking at Rachel who was staring at her, giving her a curious look. "Okay, come with me. I'll introduce you to all the kids and then you'll have lots of friends."

"You will?"

"Yeah."

"Thank you. You're nice, Monica."

Monica grinned at her as she grabbed Rachel's hand and pulled her up. She led Rachel around the classroom, stopping at each person to introduce them to the new girl. Monica beamed as Rachel stood beside her and followed her from kid to kid. Monica was determined. She would keep this friend. So many times, she had been the designated person to introduce the new kid to everyone and then that new kid would soon dump Monica. No, Rachel would be different. Rachel would be her best friend. That was all there was to it.

Rachel remembered it being such a pivotal moment as well. She loved that Monica was so nice. The other kids in her other school weren't nice and no she did not think it had anything to do with her giving unsolicited haircuts. She did think Monica's obsession with babies was a little odd but even then she just wanted to be near her. She thought Monica was pretty neat.

Lunchtime soon came and Rachel and Monica sat across from each other on the playground. Rachel's lunch was filled with all sorts of healthy things, carrot sticks, salad, even her sandwich was healthy. Monica's was quite the opposite, filled with Twinkies and cupcakes.

"Your lunch looks yummy, Monica. My mommy and daddy always say that my lunches are oranganic."

"What does that mean?"

"It means that if you eat a lot of carrots, your pee turns orange."

"Ewwww. That's gross."

"I know."

"Why do your mommy and daddy want you to have orange pee?"

"I don't know. What is that?" Rachel asked, pointing to the Twinkie in Monica's hand.

"It's a Twinkie."

"Can I try? I've never had one," Rachel said. She always got the worst lunches, at least she felt so. She desperately wanted cupcakes or something.

"You've never had a Twinkie?"

"My parents say it's bad for you."

Monica looked at Rachel, puzzled. That seemed like such nonsense. Sure her parents wished she didn't eat Twinkies but they still gave them to her. She looked down at the Twinkie and handed it to Rachel. She ripped opened the cellophane packaging and took a bite as Monica grabbed a cupcake out of her lunch. Rachel looked amazed.

"Whoa," Rachel said.

"I know," Monica said.

"Fatty," another girl said as she approached them. Monica looked up and saw Sharon, Nancy and Mindy standing in front of them.

"Oink, oink, piggie pig," Mindy said.

Monica's eyes darkened as she looked at Rachel who simply looked confused. Monica was heavy, very heavy and it was a fact that did not go unnoticed by her classmates, especially by Mindy, Sharon and Nancy. They never missed an opportunity to pick on her. Monica truly hated them. Rachel didn't understand why thet were being mean.

"Rachel, you wanna play with us. You don't wanna play with Piggie because she'll eat you," Nancy said.

"Oh...um..." Rachel said.

"You can be in our secret club," Mindy said.

"Mindy," Nancy said, looking upset.

"Sorry," Mindy said.

Rachel's eyes fill with tears as she remembers this even now. She wonders what would have happened had she given a different answer? Maybe she would have been made fun of? Maybe she would have been teased? She still would have had Monica as a friend but in that moment, in the mind of a six year old, she couldn't bear the thought of being made fun of, of being teased in this new school.

"I'll...I'll play with you. I wanna be in a secret club," Rachel said, standing up. She quickly grabbed her lunch, glancing at Monica. "I'm sorry."

"No, her name is Piggie," Nancy said, grinned.

"Okay," Rachel said as she gave Monica a sad look as she walked off with Nancy, Sharon and Mindy leaving Monica alone. Rachel had not finished her half of the Twinkie. Monica reached for it and took a bite. It was happening again. She was alone. She was always alone. Rachel kept looking back at Monica as Mindy, Sharon and Nancy kept walking. She wanted to be back eating that Twinkie but she didn't want the new kids to hate her. She was well-liked in kindergarten even if they called her a bully and she wanted to be well-liked again.

Across the playground, under a green awning, was a boy who by was tall for his age. He had always gotten that. Tall for his age, that's what he had always been told. That's what the doctors said. Tall, quiet and serious. His nose always in a book, preferably one about dinosaurs. He was only in second grade but he was reading way above grade level and he was reading a grown-up book about brontosauruses when he saw Rachel for the first time. He was sitting at the lunch tables, his book wide open, when he looked up and saw Rachel sitting with his sister. Monica always seemed to have a new friend. That friend would be with her for a few days and then leave and that's what seemed to be happening now. He watched as Mindy, Sharon and Nancy, those three mean girls in his sister's class, walked over to her and then Rachel, whose name he did not know yet, got up and walked off with the three girls leaving Monica looking sad. He contemplated getting up and sitting with her, but she always sat alone although never for long. She always had another friend come along.

The Geller kids were not considered popular, not considered cool and Ross accepted that. His sister was having a more difficult time accepting that. Ross had two friends which he was fine with. Some might say that he had a very mature outlook for someone his age. He was fine with his two buddies, no need for more.

"Look what I found?" Will Colbert said, sitting across him and dumping a bunch of rocks on the table. Will was a classmate of Ross'. He was heavy set but with a handsome face that made him attractive to a lot of the girls and was one of his closest friends. One of two.

"Rocks."

"How cool would this be for the volcano? Actual rocks," Will said.

Ross smiled, picking up a rock and turning it in his hand. He and Will had come across a terrific idea. They would be making a volcano but would be making it with actual rocks instead of plaster and a soda bottle.

"Very cool," Ross grinned. "So awesome. We could make it explode."

"That's the plan."

"Maybe we can stick my sister in there," Ross mused.

"She wouldn't fit in there."

"If we make the hole big enough," Ross said.

Will laughed as the two boys began examining the rocks, picking them up and making a giant mountain on the table. It would be amazing to figure out how to make a giant volcano. A big, giant volcano that they could set up in the backyard. Maybe Jonathan Eliot would write something about it. Write a story about it? Jonathan was his other close friend in second grade and he wrote stuff a lot. He liked to write stories, especially about Ross' dinosaurs or comics. He liked to write comic books.

Ross Geller liked comic books, dinosaurs and was the prodigal son, at least in his parents' eyes. Monica would get in trouble, but he was the golden boy. He walked the straight and narrow line, never making a wave. His parent-teacher conferences were meetings that were held up as what every parent-teacher conference should be and his parents were far less strict with him than they were with Monica. Ross would never do anything wrong, as far as they were concerned.

After school, he'd ride his bike down the street towards Astros Comics and meet Jonathan and Will. They'd walk up and down the aisles, reading and playing in the store until they became far too rowdy for Angelo, the owner, and he told them to leave. They'd end up sitting out on the curb with comics that Angelo would give them and they would sit and pore over the pages.

"Batman or Superman," Jonathan mused. "Who would win in a fight?"

"Spiderman," Will said.

"That wasn't a choice," Jonathan said.

"Batman. Batman's the best," Ross said as he looked over the magazine.

"Hey, that girl goes to our school," Will said pointing across the street at Olivia's Boutique. Ross looked up and saw Rachel again. She was walking into the store with an older lady whom Ross assumed was her mother.

"I'll be right back," Ross said standing up and walking to the curb. He stopped and looked both ways before running across the street towards Olivia's. He walked in and saw the older lady talking to a woman behind the counter and Rachel standing by a mannequin, tugging at the skirt. Ross watched her as she carefully pulled the skirt off the mannequin and very gently began replacing it with one she had next to her.

"Are you allowed to do that?" Ross asked.

Rachel looked him strangely and turned back to what she was doing. She was in her zone and she thought Ross looked odd. She was also super focused as she moved the mannequin in a way so that she could easily fix it.

"Yes, I am," Rachel said. "My aunt owns this store. She lets me make sure the dolls are dressed nicely."

Rachel's first job involved child labor, apparently. Her aunt had opened a store, Olivia's around the time Rachel was born. It's no longer there, having closed down in 2010. Her aunt wanted to retire and in a strange turn of events, Rachel actually ended up buying Olivia's and renaming it Six of One, making it a second location for her store but in 1976, Rachel's favorite place on Earth was that store. She would run and hide in between the racks of clothes, play, decorate the mannequins. She didn't want to leave. She wanted to stay there forever. It didn't matter that she was too young, she didn't care that she couldn't reach any mannequins and had to lower them to the ground before she could change them. She just felt at home there.

"Oh. We go to the same school. I think you were eating lunch with my sister. Monica."

"I know Monica, but I didn't eat lunch with her," Rachel said.

"My sister's a weirdo," Ross said.

"Is she sad?" Rachel asked and she truly meant it. Many years later, she still regretted that choice.

"She's always sad. I'm Ross," he said.

"Rachel."

"Sweetie, are you about done?" Sandra Green asked from the counter. Rachel looked towards her and nodded.

"Yes, mommy. See, Aunt Olivia. It's prettier with the blue skirt," Rachel grinned.

"It is, you are definitely right," Olivia said.

"Okay, I'm gonna go. Tell Monica not to be sad," Rachel said walking off. Ross stepped back and walked out of the store and looked at his two friends across the street. He looked both ways and then walked across the street to rejoin them.

"Did you kiss Rachel?" Will asked.

"Ewwww," Jonathan said, laughing.

"No. Gross, Will. I don't kiss girls. Girls are gross."

"No, Mrs. Singer is pretty," Will protested. Mrs. Singer was their second grade teacher.

"Mrs. Singer isn't a girl," Jonathan said.

"No, she's….she's like….like Wonder Woman pretty," Ross said as the three boys let that thought sink in. Soon, they got on their bikes and immediately began to ride back home, racing each other down the streets before separating and heading back home. Ross kept thinking about Rachel though. It wasn't a crush at that time but maybe something else. He wasn't quite sure.


	4. Chapter 4

**September 1976….continued**

While Ross was off with his friends, Monica was home thinking of eating. She thought of Rachel ditching her. She thought of the nicknames. She needed to console herself. She walked to the kitchen and started this time with the pantry. She ate through boxes of cookies, crackers and a bag of pretzels and then she moved to the fridge. She opened it and saw a big chocolate cake that her mother had baked to celebrate Ross but she wasn't sure. She grabbed it and walked outside. Everyone was home so she thought maybe she could do the thing outside so she would not get in trouble. She grabbed a fork and a napkin and walked out. She sat by a tree and ate, one spoonful after the other, taking special pleasure in eating the parts that said, "CONGRATULATIONS ROSS". She kept eating. She felt full but it didn't matter, she needed to keep going.

When Ross finally got home, he ran to his parents who were now sitting in the kitchen, his dad was sorting through the mail as his mom started getting some pasta ready for dinner.

"Guess what Angelo gave me?" Ross asked, shoving the Batman comic book to his dad.

"Nice," Jack said, flipping through the comic book. "How much money do we owe Angelo, the comic book guy at this point?"

"I think we might need to mortgage the house," Judy joked as she looked at her husband.

"And guess what? Will collected more rocks for our volcano and….well, look," Ross said as he reached into his backpack and pulled out a drawing to show Jack. Judy walked over to the table and looked at the drawing. It was a pile of rocks with the big writing of a second grader.

"Can we please make the volcano in the backyard?" Ross asked.

"Are we going to be able to stop you?" Jack asked.

"No, but we will be very careful. We will even wear goggles and hats," Ross explained. Jonathan says he wants to write a story about it. It could be for a comic book. 'Ross, Jonathan and Will Take on A Volcano.'"

"I'd buy it," Jack said.

Judy shook her head and looked up towards the window that looked out into the backyard. The expression on her face immediately changed as she walked towards the fridge and opened it.

"She ate Ross' cake," Judy mumbled before storming outside.

"I have a cake?" Ross asked.

"Your mother made you a chocolate cake for getting in the gifted reading group ," Jack said.

"Monica Elizabeth Geller."

Monica heard her name and noticed her mom staring at her as she stormed across the yard towards her. Monica knew she was in trouble, she had been caught although there was part of her that wondered why it had taken her parents so long to notice she was outside eating cake. They had been in the kitchen for awhile and it wasn't like she was hiding, but there wasn't that much time to process as her mom grabbed her arm and immediately began to spank her. Monica let out a cry as her mom smacked her bottom. She tried to wriggle free, she would continue eating the cake. She didn't care, she had to finish it. She had to do the thing that would make her thinner. When her mom was done spanking her, she glared down at her while Monica still rubbing her bottom and sniffling.

"Why did you eat Ross' cake? That wasn't for you. That was for your brother."

"I wanted cake."

"Why do you have to ruin everything for him?" Her mom asked.

"I wanted cake," came Monica's reply as her mom grabbed her arm and pulled her towards the house.

"You are going to your room, no dinner. You are not going to ruin your brother's night," Judy said as she pulled Monica off towards her bedroom leaving Ross and Jack in the kitchen.

"Why is Monica always bad?" Ross asked.

"Oh, Harmonica is not bad….she's just different. I gotta tell you, son, you're a hard act to follow. She'll find her way."

Ross nodded and looked at his comic some more while upstairs, Monica began crying again as her mom sat her in a chair facing the wall.

"Time out," her mother said.

"Noooooo...I hate Ross," Monica cried.

"I wish you were like Ross," she heard her mother mutter before storming out of her room and slamming the door shut. Monica cried and sat facing the wall a bit longer before getting up and walking towards her rows of dolls. Her baby dolls never left her...just like food, no matter how hard she tried. When she was a grown up, she would have babies of her own and they would never leave her for Mindy, Sharon and Nancy. She would have a husband who would love her too. A husband that would like her more than her stupid brother. She picked up one of her dolls and looked under her bed where she grabbed a box. She opened it and grabbed a Hershey bar, unwrapping it and taking a bite. She walked towards her window. Climbing on her bed, she stared out the window, still crying. One day it would be less lonely.

She was momentarily distracted by Ross opening the door to her room, holding a Wonder Woman comic book. He always felt bad when she got in trouble because it happened so much. He knew she always felt sad. Maybe that was a positive side to being so close in age, they could look out for each other.

"Too much chocolate is bad for you," Ross said, sitting next to her on the bed.

"Shut up," Monica said, still crying.

"It is. You know, I saw Rachel."

"Yeah, she's new but she's not going to be my friend."

"Oh. You want me to read you Wonder Woman?" Ross asked, not sure what he was supposed to say to that.

Monica nodded as Ross began reading the comic book to her. He showed her pictures as she quietly continued to eat her chocolate. He liked reading comic books to her. It seemed to be those moments where they could bond as brother and sister because those moments did not occur often.

It was dark and she was supposed to be asleep. Instead, she was back downstairs. She snuck to the kitchen, she hadn't done the thing yet. She had thought she could do it earlier but there was no way to do it so now everyone was asleep. She opened the fridge and saw leftovers, she began to eat them. Lasagna, a loaf of bread, some soup. In the freezer, there was ice cream, frozen veggies which tasted kinda good, popsicles and soon she moved to the pantry where she polished off a box of cookies and an entire jar of peanut butter. She felt sick and ran back up the stairs towards the bathroom. She opened the door and leaned over the toilet, just like before. She reached her fingers down and soon she could taste the bile, the burning in her throat. She could feel tears running down her face as she kept throwing up until she heard her name being called. She jumped a little as she turned to see her mom standing there. She began to get afraid. Was she going to get in trouble again? Judy walked towards her and instead lifted her up, holding Monica close to her which shocked her a little. She had thought she was too heavy now to be carried. If her weight was too much for her mom at that moment, her mom said nothing. Instead, she carried Monica into her room and put her back in bed.

"Mommy?" Monica asked, staring up at her mother who looked worried, concerned even. Judy said nothing, just gently moved Monica's hair out of her face. "Mom, if….if I….the kids are mean….and….this new girl...she...she's…"

"You're okay," Judy whispered. Monica was stunned by her mom saying nothing. Was she in trouble?

"Mom?"

Judy leaned in and kissed her on the forehead which seemed to spark something in Monica. Monica began sobbing, crying, almost heaving. She wasn't sure what happened or what triggered it. She wished she was getting in trouble instead of this. Judy lay down next to Monica and gently held her as she cried, rocking her in the dark and the crying continued. It was that moment Judy knew, this weight thing was deep rooted, that this was going to be a problem. She felt guilt, sadness. She didn't want to know that her six year old daughter was making herself throw up and she just was unsure what she was supposed to do to make it stop. She always knew she was harsher with Monica than Ross. Jack and Judy had arguments about this but she was never sure why. It wasn't because Ross was her favorite as Monica would say but maybe she expected more?

Nothing more was said and the next day at school, Rachel was sitting with Nancy, Sharon and Mindy. They were giggling and Monica felt alone although Mindy, Sharon, Nancy and Rachel seemed to make sure Monica didn't feel alone. Every time they saw her, they'd say something. It killed her inside. Twenty four hours earlier, Rachel had been her friend. Now, nothing. Monica wished she could do something, wished she was thinner. She wished her mom had let her finish the thing she was doing. Rachel, Mindy, Sharon and Nancy were thin. If only….

"Elephant, elephant...walks like an elephant," Sharon said as she, Rachel, Mindy and Nancy passed by Monica on the playground. Monica sat brushing the hair of one of the dolls in the classroom, her name was Paula and she had a nightmare so Monica took Paula outside and was tending to her when the four girls took that moment to tease her.

"Piggie and smells like one too," Nancy said.

Monica looked over at Rachel and thought she could see a hint of sadness in Rachel's eyes. Monica wondered if Rachel felt sad which Rachel did but she didn't want it known. Rachel quickly shook her head.

"Monicow. She's Monica and she's a cow. Monicow," Rachel said. Mindy, Sharon and Nancy all stared at Rachel, grinning.

"That's good," Sharon said.

Rachel smiled as Monica's eyes filled with tears. She wanted to cry again. She stared at Rachel who suddenly looked alarmed. Even then, Rachel knew she had done a horrible thing. This was why people probably called her a bully. Maybe she was a bad kid? Suddenly, Nancy, Mindy and Sharon raced off, all three yelling to anyone within earshot that Monica's new name was now, "Monicow". Rachel stared at Monica.

"I'm sorry, Monica."

"Leave me alone. I hate you."

"No, don't hate me. I don't want you to hate me. We can be secret friends? That's better. Then we get to share more secrets? Will you be my secret friend?" Rachel asked, crying. How come Monica didn't get it?

Rachel looked sad and Monica shrugged her shoulders. She wiped the tears away from her face as she stared at Rachel.

"I guess," Monica said.

"Rachel, get away from Monicow," Nancy yelled from across the playground.

"I have to go," Rachel raced off towards Nancy. Monica continued to watch from the sidelines as her classmates continuing taunting her with cries of "Monicow". She stared down at the red haired doll in her arms and craddled her. Paula was scared, she could tell. She would concentrate on Paula, not on the others. They didn't understand. They were mean. They called her names. Paula wouldn't call her names, Paula just wanted to feel better so that's what Monica focused on, hoping that she would feel better herself.

Ross had heard about Monica's new nickname through the elementary school gossip mill. Rachel had called her, 'Monicow' and now people were oinking and mooing at her whenever Monica walked somewhere. He didn't want to moo or oink at her. He did not want to make those sounds, but Rachel was doing it. During lunch, Rachel called Monica 'Monicow' in front of everyone. People began laughing and Monica looked on the verge of tears. Rachel looked over at Ross who was sitting with Jonathan and Will at the next table.

"Geek Geller, doesn't your sister look like a piggie cow," Rachel said although if only Ross and Monica knew or maybe they did now. It killed her every single time she said it. She didn't know how to stop.

"Well-" Ross began.

"You should moo at Monicow," Nancy said.

"And oink at her," Sharon said, "'cause she's a piggie cow. Get it?"

"Mooo, piggie, piggie," Ross yelled suddenly. He felt mortified as Monica glared at him. She got up and ran away from the tables in tears. He felt forced to do that. Rachel knew she had been the one to force him.

"That was mean," Jonathan said as Ross said down.

"Well, Monica's my sister. She knows I didn't mean it," Ross said.

"He just said it 'cause he wants to kiss Rachel," Will said.

"Ewwww," Ross said, looking towards his sister who was now playing with a red haired doll at the end of the playground away from everyone else. He felt sad and hoped Monica knew he didn't mean it. He got up and walked towards her, sitting alone. He sat next to her. "Mon?"

"Go away."

"I'm sorry. She's mean."

"Why doesn't anyone like me?" Monica asked.

"I like you."

"You have to."

"No, I don't."

"I wanna shove a Twinkie up her butt," Monica muttered which made Ross laugh.

"Come on, sit with me."

"I'm fine….I don't want to."

"You sure."

Monica nodded as Ross walked towards the table. He glared at Rachel as she sat with Mindy, Sharon and Nancy. He watched her as she sat quietly. She looked sad too. He wondered why she would feel sad? His sister was the one who should feel sad.

Soon, everyone was calling Monica "Monicow". Rachel hated that she had started that nickname. She didn't want to start that nickname but she didn't have a choice. Mrs. Gold eventually caught on to the mean nickname and asked people who started it. She was shocked when Nancy told on Rachel.

"Rachel?" Mrs. Gold asked.

"It wasn't me, Mrs. Gold," Rachel said.

"It was too," Nancy said.

"It wasn't," Rachel said, looking over at Monica. Monica looked away. If Rachel thought Monica was going to bail her out, she was wrong. Rachel looked back to Mrs. Gold.

"It was Rachel," Monica said, not caring at all if Rachel got in trouble. She was being called Monicow.

"It wasn't," Rachel said.

"Rachel, go to the office please," Mrs. Gold said.

"I didn't do anything," Rachel said, tears filling up in her eyes. She started to cry, "I didn't do anything. I'm sorry. I'm really sorry. I didn't mean to do anything. I just...I'm sorry Monica. Please. I don't wanna be in trouble."

Rachel sobbed harder, so much so that she could barely breathe. Mrs. Gold looked at Rachel and her look of anger seemed to melt into sympathy. She walked over to Rachel and knelt down in front of her.

"Honey, it's okay. It is. Remember we use nice words," Mrs. Gold said.

Monica's mouth dropped, watching this entire performance. She could not believe Mrs. Gold had fallen for it. Rachel had been faking, she was sure of it. Rachel did not care.

"I know. I will, I promise. I'll use nice words. I don't wanna be in trouble," Rachel cried.

"Okay, I will give you one more chance," Mrs. Gold said.

"Okay," Rachel said. Mrs. Gold hugged her and as the teacher walked back towards the board, Rachel looked over at Nancy and grinned. Nancy's mouth dropped as Rachel sat down on the carpet. She looked over at Monica who looked angrily at her and turned back to look at the teacher. Monica didn't understand.

At the end of the day, Mindy, Sharon and Nancy surrounded Rachel. They wanted to discuss what had happened in the classroom.

"You're a bad kid," Nancy said.

"I am not," Rachel said.

"You lied," Mindy said.

"Naw-aww, I just didn't wanna go to the principal's office," Rachel said.

"You're cool," Sharon said.

"Thank you. If you can cry, you can get away with stuff," Rachel grinned. It was her secret weapon. She let the tears flow. It got her what she wanted.

Of course, Mrs. Gold told Sandra as soon as she picked Rachel up from school. She told Sandra that Rachel had started a mean nickname. Sandra smiled at Mrs. Gold and told her that Rachel was a naive, sweet girl. She didn't mean anything by it. Rachel smiled the entire car ride home. She did need to talk to Monica though. She liked Monica. She did.

That night, Rachel overheard her parents talking in their room. They were talking about her. Sandra was telling her dad about what happened at school and her dad kept saying that they were letting Rachel get away with too much. Sandra disagreed.

"Mommy? Daddy?" Rachel said, walking into the room.

"Go to your room, Rachel," Leonard Green said.

"I didn't do anything wrong," Rachel said.

"Go to your room," Leonard said.

"She's only six and she didn't do anything wrong," Sandra said.

"She got kicked out of kindergarten for being a bully and now she's doing it again," Leonard said.

"I didn't do anything," Rachel said.

"Did you call a girl, Monicow?" Leonard asked.

"No, I didn't," Rachel said.

"So your teacher is lying," Leonard said.

"I-I-I didn't do it," Rachel said.

"Your sister also said you were the one who put the salt in the sugar the other morning and got her in trouble," Leonard said.

"Jill did it," Rachel said, immediately before realizing her mistake. She was scared standing there in front of her father. "I mean, Amy. Amy did it."

Leonard stared at her and Rachel sniffled when her dad immediately grabbed her and sat down on the edge of his bed. He put Rachel over his knee and proceeded to spank her. Rachel let out a cry and Sandra yelled at her husband.

"Stop, Leonard. Stop it!" Sandra said.

"We need to spank her more," Leonard yelled. "This is getting ridiculous."

"I don't wanna be spanked," Rachel cried. "No, I didn't do it. It wasn't my fault."

Leonard continued to spank her and when he was done, he took her to her room and sat her down, facing a wall. Rachel was crying, real tears now. She had never been spanked before. It scared her. Sandra soon appeared in Rachel's room and looked at her daughter.

"I understand, Rachel. You didn't do anything wrong," Sandra said.

"No, I didn't. Amy was the one who did the prank and Nancy made up the nickname," Rachel said.

Sandra gathered Rachel in her arms and held her as she continued crying. She kept crying and soon she wasn't even crying about getting in trouble. She was crying because she knew what being a bully meant and she didn't want to be one. She was nice, at least she thought she was

A few days later, Rachel was over at the Geller house. She and Monica sat in the Geller pantry and he wanted to know what was going on but he wasn't sure he was allowed in there to find out.

"You're weird," Ross said to Rachel as she emerged from the pantry to walk to the bathroom. He had been sitting on the couch, reading a dinosaur encyclopedia when he saw her walk across the room. She looked at him.

"What?"

"You're weird."

"I'm not weird. You're weird. What are you reading?"

"A Dinosaur Encyclopedia."

"What?"

"You're weird," Ross said.

"You're stupid."

"Why are you so mean to my sister at school but then you come over and stay in a pantry with her?" Ross asked.

"We're secret friends."

"That's weird. Why can't you just be friends, friends."

"'Cause….I don't wanna tell you. You were mean to her."

"She's my sister. I'm allowed to be mean to her. You're not her sister. You're not allowed to be mean to her."

"I'm going to the bathroom," Rachel said, looking at the floor.

"I heard you almost got sent to the principal's office for being mean."

"I didn't."

"You cried your way out of it."

"How do you know?" Rachel asked.

"Jonathan's sister, Kayla, is in your class."

"Oh."

"Kayla told Jonathan that you're mean and you can cry to get out of getting sent to the principal's office."

"I'm not mean," Rachel said, suddenly, her eyes filling with tears. "I'm not mean, Ross. You take that back."

"Don't be mean to my sister."

"I'm not mean. I'm going to the bathroom. I am not a mean person," Rachel said as she walked off towards the bathroom. He looked back at his magazine when Monica soon approached him.

"What did you say to Rachel?" Monica asked.

"I don't know. Did she really cry to get out of being sent to the principal's office?"

"Yeah. I don't think she's really mean."

"Really?"

"I think she's weird," Monica said. "She's nice but not at school. Like she's two people."

She was really starting to believe that. There was something not right about Rachel. She really was like two people. While they were in the pantry, she was sweet and kind and funny but when they were at school, she became mean. She walked back to the pantry as she heard Ross mumble something about girls being weird. Soon, Rachel returned from the bathroom and without speaking to him, went to go find Monica. Ross kept thinking about Rachel though and what Monica said. He walked up to his room and grabbed some crayons and paper and began drawing. Jonathan had taught him to draw comic books and he began drawing a girl with brown hair. She had two faces. He didn't know what to call the girl but the girl with two faces was good when no one else was around but evil when surrounded by other people. It was a new comic book character idea and one he would have to discuss with Jonathan and Will.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chandler**

 **April 1977**

His father held his hand and began to lead him down the hallway in his large commune of a home. His eyes were shut. He was turning eight and had wanted a party but he had given up asking that. Not that he was expecting to have one. Even at eight, he knew how his birthdays went. He had parties with his friends at school. His friends' parents would call the teacher, cupcakes and cake would be brought, celebrations would be had. His friends had told him the true reasons they could not come to the house. Their parents did not want them coming over. There were too many adult things happening at the Bing Home. So he had given up with expecting parties but his dad apparently had a birthday surprise for him.

"Dad, you better be wearing clothes when I open my eyes," Chandler said.

"One time...I was showing you a dress I bought and you weren't supposed to open your eyes."

"Well, why did you have to try on a dress you bought for mom? Besides, I don't think she liked it. She never wears it."

"Yeah…." Charles just said as he held on to Chandler's hand. "Just keep your eyes closed."

He kept walking for what felt like forever until he heard a door open, he was dragged in somewhere and then told to open his eyes. As he opened them, he noticed a movie theater spread out before him. A giant screen, rows of big plushy chairs and a projection screen.

"Movie theater?"

"Happy birthday, kid," Charles said.

"Oh my G-d," Chandler said.

"Come on, come on," Charles said, motioning for Chandler to follow him to another room where movies lined the shelves.

"Whoa," Chandler asked.

"I know a guy in San Francisco who opened up his own movie rental place. So I thought, why we do we need to keep going to the movies. We can bring the movies to us. We have the only home movie theater in the country, I'm sure of it."

"Well, I still like going to the movie theater."

"This will be more fun. You don't have to make that long walk home."

"I like that walk home, I visit all the old people and I eat a box of doughnuts."

"Come on, I'll pick up out some movies. We're gonna start from the beginning," Charles began looking for movies and started pulling out some VHS tapes before walking back into the theater. Chandler was stunned to see his mom sitting there as well with champagne for herself and probably for his dad. There was a cake for him.

"What are you doing here?" Charles asked.

"Celebrating," Nora said, holding up the bottle.

"Fine. You can sit with us. I'm going to set up the first movies," Charles said.

Chandler cautiously made his way towards his mom, wondering why she was there. She never liked to hang out with him.

"Happy Birthday, now you can invite your friends over," Nora said.

"No, that's okay," Chandler said.

"Why not?" Nora asked.

Chandler said next to his mom as she handed him a large slice of chocolate cake which he happily began digging into.

"Mom...they….they don't like coming over," Chandler said.

"Why not?" Nora asked. "Is it 'cause of your father?"

"Both of you. But don't worry….the teacher told me we were going to have a party at school."

"I don't have to come to that, do I?" Nora asked.

"No," Chandler said.

Charles walked back with a stack of movies and plopped down on the other side of Chandler. He barely looked at Nora and Chandler could feel the tension between them. There had been another fight between his mom and dad but he didn't pay any attention. Those were pretty normal by now, he'd just walk over to his side of the house and shut the door or go outside and play. Something had happened but it didn't matter now. He was sitting in between his parents, watching movies. He almost didn't even care about the party at school with his friends.

"What are we watching?"

"We're starting at the beginning...Birth of a Nation."

"Charles, that's a four hour long silent movie….with lynching. You're gonna show our eight year old, that," Nora said.

"You let our kid dance in a foam party at two am last night," Charles said.

"You let him tweeze the eyebrows of your boyfriend," Nora said. "Don't tell me I'm the worse parent. You wanna talk about bad parents, look in the mirror."

"Are you kidding me? You won't even attend any school function or take him anywhere."

"Neither will you."

"I took him to his tennis lesson last week," Charles said.

"And left him there. He had to take a cab home," Nora said.

"'Cause you wouldn't pick him up," Charles said.

"Okay, Mom, Dad….you're both pretty bad but can we watch the movies. Nothing bad can happen here, right? No yelling. Nothing. Only good things happen here,"

"Fine...Birth of a Nation," Nora said as the theater went dark and the movie began. Charles left part way through to get them some candy and the movie was pretty dark. It didn't quite matter. Sure at school, he'd have a party and it would be fun. His teachers always made sure of it. He'd wear a paper crown from Burger King and he'd feel like King for Day but this birthday was different. It felt different. He actually got to be with his parents and they also stayed with him. They stayed in the theater the whole day watching movies with him. They had to break down Birth of a Nation, it was just too long but his favorites. He had never seen them. Charlie Chaplin, Buster Keaton, Laurel and Hardy, Fatty Arbuckle. It was an art. They were funny, clowns, the way they moved, reacted. He wanted to be that. He wanted to make people laugh. There was always less tension when people laughed.

 **Joey**

 **June 1977**

Tony high school graduation was at the Tribbiani home. Joey's parents decided to throw him a party. Tony's parents didn't seem to care too much and that seemed to be Joey's gain. The party was amazing. People filled his house, they were dancing, drinking, doing adult activities much to Gloria's chagrin. Joey loved it. He always felt it was just a sign of how good his life was.

"This party is getting insane," Gloria said as she picked up four year old Tina who was sitting on the floor, playing with an empty can of soda and walked towards Tony's mom, "The cops are gonna come."

"Please, the cops don't give a shit," Tony's mom said. "I'm just impressed those mother fuckers let my kid graduate."

"Joey, go upstairs and take Tina with you," Gloria said, setting Tina down. Joey grabbed his little sister's hand walked her upstairs but not before quickly glancing back at the packed downstairs. This was was beyond awesome to him. His parents were running around, trying to keep everything calm and maybe some might say this was no place for kids to be. His parents would definitely say that but he didn't see the problem. It was people having fun. That's what a party was.

Upstairs, Gloria and Joseph Senior wanted all the kids to stay inside their room. They had set up games, snacks, videos. Tina walked over and sat with Veronica, Mary Therese and Mary Angela who were playing with their dolls. Joey could hear the pumping of music through the walls. He could hear a group of drunken party guests singing Hotel California at the top of their lungs. He wanted to be out there.

"I am so bored," Gina said, flipping through the channels on their parent's television.

"Me too," Cookie said. "I wanna do something."

"You know, Christopher and Tony and everyone else are in your room," Gina said.

"Wait, really?" Joey asked, that didn't seem fair. Why did he have to be with all the kids while all his buddies were hanging out in his room?

"Yeah, I know. It's not fair. It's our house," Gina said.

"Hmmm, well, I'm going to my room," Joey said.

"Me too," Gina said.

"I wanna go," Cookie said.

Gina and Cookie got off the bed and walked towards Joey. The younger Tribbiani sisters looked up from their dolls, noticing that they were about to leave.

"You're not allowed to leave. Mommy and Daddy said," Veronica said.

"Yeah and if you tell, I'll beat the four of you senseless and mail you off to your real parents," Cookie said.

"I'd listen to her, she's a tough Cookie," Joey said.

"I'll beat you," Cookie said.

"I'd like to see you try. I'd beat you back," Joey said.

"You don't hit girls," Cookie said.

"I don't see any girls here," Joey remarked.

"Come on, I wanna go," Gina said as the older three Tribbianis walked out the door and towards Joey's room. As he walked in, his mouth dropped. He had never seen anything like this. Tony was sitting on Joey's bed with Tony's girlfriend, Carmela sitting on his lap. She was facing him as they were kissing.

"Holy crap," Joey muttered.

"This is so inappropriate," Gina said.

"I know, right? This is awesome. Wait, is inappropriate a good thing or a bad thing?" Joey asked.

"Hey, we're drinking beer," Christopher said as he walked towards Joey, Gina and Cookie. He had a bunch of silver cans in his hands and handed them to Gina, Joey and Cookie.

"Where did you find beer?" Joey asked.

"Downstairs, Uncle T's parents bought them for the party," Christopher said. "Drink up."

Joey, Gina and Cookie exchanged looks and opened their cans. The three immediately drank. It felt fizzy going down. He kinda liked it. Kinda didn't. It was fun though.

"Little J," Tony said, "you meet Carmela?"

"Hey, you're cute," Carmela said.

"Hey, you wanna help me take off her bra?" Tony asked.

"Tony, he's a kid," Carmela said.

"He's gotta learn, kiss me," Tony said looking at Carmela as she leaned into a kiss with him. Joey took another drink of his beer and made his way through the crowds in his room. People were everywhere, he had never seen it quite so packed. He looked back and saw Cookie and Gina clink their beer cans together as he turned and almost walked right into another girl.

"Watch where you're going," the blonde said, sipping her beer. She looked like one of his sister's Barbie dolls with a small little waist, long blonde hair and the bluest eyes he had ever seen. He was mesmerized by her.

"Sorry...this is my room. I'm Joey."

"I'm Kelsey. Nice room."

"So how do you know Tony?" Joey asked.

"Oh, I don't. I'm friends with Blundetto's sister."

"Cool….so….how you doin'?" Joey asked. He was almost stunned by the question. It had just felt like the thing to ask. Kelsey looked a little older and through some conversation, learned she was in eighth grade. She had boobs, she wore a tight shirt. They drank more beer. Maybe that's what helped him loosen up. It helped Kelsey loosen up. Soon the two found an unoccupied corner to sit in.

"You know, you're really cute Joey. I can't believe you're only in seventh grade," Kelsey said. He knew he had to lie. He couldn't tell her he was only nine. That just felt wrong.

"Yeah, I'm gonna be in seventh grade."

"I like this song."

Joey smiled as Kelsey, put her hand on his knee and leaned in. He felt as her lips pressed against his, he gently placed his beer down and placed his hands on her waist and slid them under her shirt. It was as if his hands acted on their own. She didn't back away as he reached under her shirt and towards her bra. He reached towards the clasps and unhooked her bra. Kelsey grinned at him.

"Joey," Kelsey said.

"Yeah? I hope that's okay. You're pretty," Joey said as he leaned in again and the two continued kissing as he began touching her when he felt someone grab his arm suddenly and drag him out of the room. He didn't even realize what was happening as he was dragged out and into his parent's room. It dawned on him rather quickly what was happening as his mother and father began spanking him and his two sisters. Cookie was crying about how unfair it all was and Gina still seemed a little drunk. When they were done getting in trouble, they were told once again to remain there before leaving.

"This is so unfair," Cookie said.

"I know, why are we getting in trouble? It's our house," Gina said.

"I'm going back to the party," Cookie said.

"Me too, we now have to make ourselves look good," Gina said as she and Cookie walked towards the door. "Joey, you coming?"

"Yeah. I miss Kelsey," Joey said, following them out. He didn't care, he wanted to go back to her. He wanted to be with the other people, with his friends. He walked towards the door and the trio left the room but he didn't follow Gina and Cookie into his room, instead he went downstairs to find his mother. She was in the kitchen.

"Didn't I tell you to-" Gloria said as soon as she saw him.

"Mom, wait….it's-it's not fair 'cause...it's my room they're all hanging out in and there are so many people here and it's just...mom, you can't keep us all in there when there is so much happening in here," Joey said.

Gloria looked over at her son. She hated that he could talk so smoothly. She wasn't sure who she could blame that on, but she could discuss something else with him. She hated Tony's influence on Joey. She hated how her son worshipped him and she wanted so badly for her son to see who Tony was but he refused. It would take another couple decades for Joey to come to that realization on his own but at nine, he still just wanted to be Tony.

"Alright, go but...Joey, I didn't like what you were doing with that girl. You're nine. Not nineteen."

"I promise. Can I have a sandwich?" Joey asked.

"I'll make you one."

Joey smiled as he ran back upstairs towards his room where Gina and Cookie were drinking something. He was grinning.

"You're back," Christopher said.

"I know, I wouldn't miss this," Joey said as he walked towards Kelsey who was sitting cross legged on his floor. She looked at him and raised an eyebrow as he sat next to her.

"How old are you?" Kelsey asked.

"Does it matter?" Joey asked.

"Kinda," Kelsey said.

"I don't think it matters, he's a master. I think we found your skill," Tony grinned.

"Ton, don't encourage him," Carmela said, still perched on Tony's lap.

"How old are you?" Kelsey said.

"Nine," Joey said.

"Ewww, I just made out with a nine year old," Kelsey said.

"I wouldn't say ewww. I mean, look, you taught me. You opened my eyes to a new world that I don't know. Look, all I have are sisters and you taught me about women and you gave me lessons that I will need to know for the rest of my life," Joey said.

"See, the kid's got skills," Tony said.

"You're like a little pimp," Carmela said. "That'll be my new nickname for you, 'Little Pimp."

"Sounds good," Joey said. He liked that name. He really didn't see anything too strange about what he was doing. Age was just a number. Who knew what was appropriate for a nine year old? He liked being around Kelsey. It shouldn't matter his age, just that he enjoyed her.

 **August 1977**

It was supposed to be Monica's seventh birthday party. Maybe it was summer. It was the end of summer. End of summer birthdays are hard. People go on vacations. They had sent out the cards, though. They had mailed them a month ago. Monica had even addressed the envelopes. People did RSVP. They said okay. Even though it was summer, they had said okay. Rachel had even said okay. But maybe things came up. A month to plan vacations and realize they needed supplies for school. Her parents said nothing. Her brother even left her alone as she stared at a cake with unlit candles. She began eating at it. No one told her to stop.

"Hey, I have an idea. Let's go to Adventureland," Jack Geller said.

"Yeah, that would be fun," Judy said.

Adventureland was a theme park much like Disneyland and was a half hour away in Farmingdale. She had been there with her brother once before. She hated it. She was too big to fit in any of the rides that were for little kids.

"I don't wanna," Monica said.

"Come on, you love the tea cups….you like to try to make your dad throw up," Judy said.

"I'm too fat," Monica said.

"Oh, no….Harmonica is perfect. You're not too fat," Jack said.

"I wanna go to Adventureland," Judy said.

"Mommy, you hate Adventureland. You don't even go on any of the rides," Monica said.

"'Cause your mom is a wimp," Jack said.

"I am not," Judy said.

"Sure, honey," Jack said rolling is his eyes as Judy playfully smacked him. Monica giggled as she tried her best to stop the tears from flowing. Even Rachel had bailed. She thought maybe Rachel might come because she hadn't invited Mindy, Sharon and Nancy, but she was a no show.

Upstairs, Ross stared at his phone. He had the roster flipped open and saw her number. He was getting annoyed by this. Why was she this way? He picked up the phone and dialed.

"Green Residence," Sophie McMahon answered the phone. Sophie was an older lady who was babysitting the three Green girls while Leonard and Sandra Green were out of town somewhere. Sophie was the sometimes nanny, sometimes chef. She did everything.

"Hi...hi...it's Ross...is Rachel there?"

Sophie looked over at Rachel taking a bite of her tuna sandwich while glancing through a Vogue.

"Yes, she is. Rachel, sweetie. Phone is for you, a boy named Ross?" Sophie held out the phone.

Rachel's face went pale as she felt sick. She knew why he was calling. She knew what today was. She knew exactly what she was forgetting or what she had said she would forget. She had gotten Monica's invitation but when she told Mindy, Sharon and Nancy, they laughed at her. They had not been invited and they had told her if she went, they would no longer be her friend so she had done the bad thing. She knew why Ross was calling.

"I don't wanna talk to him," Rachel tried.

Sophie cocked her head to the side as Rachel turned back to her sandwich. Turning to the phone, she told Ross to hold on as she walked towards the table and sat down.

"Honey?" Sophie asked.

"I don't wanna talk about it," Rachel said.

"I understand." Sophie said.

"I crossed it out," Rachel said as she sat, staring at the magazine. "I did a bad thing."

Sophie was a little more confused, what had she crossed out? It soon dawned on her. She walked towards a calendar that was tacked up on a bulletin board. On August 20th, there was written: MONICA GELLER BIRTHDAY PARTY but it was crossed out in red pen. Reaching for the phone, she put it up to her ear.

"Ross, sweetie...could you put your mom or dad on the phone?"

"Yeah, hold on," Ross said. He put the phone down and ran back downstairs to tell his parents what he had done. He called the Greens and now someone from the Green family wanted to talk to them. Judy took the call.

"Why did you call Rachel?" Monica asked.

"Because I'm the only one who gets to be mean to you," Ross said.

"Well, don't-"

"No, dad….Rachel is nice but she's only nice in private and she's nice to Monica sometimes and she should be here right now," Ross said.

"Okay, well….we're going to Adventureland. I'm gonna get ready. Harmonica, you ready?" Jack asked.

"Oh, yeah...then we can make dad super sick on the ride," Ross said.

"Yeah, yeah…..I guess," Monica said.

"Okay, Rachel's nanny is going to bring her over here," Judy said, walking back into the kitchen.

"What? Mom, I don't want-" Monica started.

"No, she's coming and she's also spending the night," Judy said.

"Awesome. Now, we can go get ready," Jack said.

Monica let out a loud, sad sigh. She almost didn't want Rachel to come anymore. She figured if Rachel didn't want to come, she shouldn't have to be forced.

"Can I invite Jonathan?" Ross asked.

"Sure, okay, let's get this party started," Jack said as he stood up and grabbed Monica's hand. He picked her up and spun her which made her laughed. Okay, maybe Adventureland wouldn't be so bad. Maybe it would be fun? Rachel was being forced to hang out with her but maybe it wasn't the worst thing. Rachel really was only her friend in secret.

Back at the Green home, Sophie hung up the phone and sat back down with Rachel who was staring at her magazine.

"Did you hear what I just said to Monica's mom?" Sophie asked.

"Yeah. Guess I'm sleeping over at Monica's."

Sophie took the magazine away as Rachel kept staring ahead. Sophie gently cupped Rachel's chin in her hand and turned her face towards her.

"Why did you cross out Monica's birthday?"

"I told my mom and dad they weren't having it anymore and I crossed it out."

"Why?" Sophie asked. "Do you not like Monica?"

"No, no...I like Monica, she's my best friend. It's...other girls are mean to her."

"Doesn't mean you have to be."

"Don't tell my mom and dad."

"I won't but you have to promise me something?"

"What?"

"Don't be afraid," Sophie said.

"I'm not afraid," Rachel said, tears falling down her cheeks. "It's…"

"You know, I remember several months ago when it was your birthday. Monica wasn't here."

"I didn't invite her."

"Hmmm...why not?"

"'Cause…'cause….people are mean to her."

"Like Mindy and Sharon and Nancy….I remember them saying not so not nice things about Monica."

"Yeah. Don't say anything. You don't understand," Rachel said, crying.

"I do but….why don't I take you to Monica's house and you can have fun with her."

"Okay."

Rachel jumped off the chair and gave Sophie a hug before running off to get ready. She threw things in a bag and was soon on her way to the Gellers. I wish I could reached out to Sophie, but unfortunately she passed away almost 16 years ago. Sophie McMahon. That was her name and at the time, unbeknownst to either Rachel or Chandler, this woman would become a rock in both of their lives. She was a tiny woman but was an absolute force. Not much was known about her, just what she provided to them. She provided stability and kindness.

I asked what they could remember about that day at Adventureland. What rides they went on, what food they ate, what they did but the story Rachel kept coming back to was what happened after Adventureland. Monica didn't argue when Rachel told the story of what happened after. What started off depressing had ended up being a full day of fun. They were all tall enough to attempt the bumper cars and Ross and Jonathan got to go on the big whirly ride called The Frisbee. They stuck mostly to the kiddie rides and Monica forgot she was even upset with Rachel in the first place. What started out horrible ended up being an okay day. They also had ice cream and candy and pizza and there was just something about being in an amusement park, the real world doesn't matter when you're in a fantasy.

Rachel woke up later that night, sleeping on a trundle bed in Monica's room. She wasn't sure what time it was but she woke up feeling a little sick. She had eaten way too much, she never ate so much. She slowly got up and began to walk towards the bathroom when she heard the sounds and saw her.

"Are you sick?" Rachel asked.

Monica looked over at Rachel, scared. She had not gone to sleep. She knew she had eaten too much that day. She had done math in her head. Some adding although she wasn't entirely sure she added correctly. She waited until Rachel fell asleep, until Jonathan and Ross were asleep, until she knew it was safe and then she snuck into the bathroom. She kneeled over and tried to get rid of the contents of the day when Rachel caught her.

"No, no," Monica said, wiping her mouth.

"What...why were you doing that? Should we tell your mom?"

"No, no…'cause I ate a lot today."

"Me too."

"So sometimes when you eat a lot, you should throw up because it helps you."

"That doesn't sound good," Rachel said.

"You can't tell grownups though 'cause they get super mad if you do it."

"I won't but….I don't...I don't think you should do that. It's gross."

"Well, I'm done," Monica said.

She flushed the toilet and began walking out of the bathroom towards her room. Rachel followed, still confused. She had planned to go to the bathroom but changed her mind as the two girls got into their own respective beds.

"Monica."

"Yeah."

"You do that a lot?"

"Sometimes but you can't tell people."

"Monica."

"If you tell, then I'll tell Mindy, Sharon and Nancy you hung out with me all day today and are spending the night."

"You can't tell them."

"Then you can't tell anyone that I threw up. Besides you know what, you didn't even wanna come. You're only here because your nanny forced you."

"That's not true."

"That is true. You didn't wanna come to my birthday."

"That's not true," Rachel stressed, tears filling her eyes again. "I won't tell anyone."

"Promise."

"I promise."

"I won't tell anyone you were forced to hang out with me," Monica said.

"You know….you-you can tell. I'm-I'm sorry for not coming-"

"You weren't the only one. No one came."

"'Cause they're stupid. But Monica….you're my best friend and-and I'm sorry for….for what I did."

"Thank you. I'm going to sleep."

Rachel nodded as she watched Monica fall asleep instantly. She still couldn't get that image out of her mind. That image of Monica throwing up. She had promised not to tell though so she had to keep it quiet. Maybe it was a one time thing. Maybe it was just a thing. She soon fell asleep as well, trying to forget what she saw and she would believe Monica. It was nothing.


	6. Chapter 6

**Joey**

 **September 1977**

After a summer of kissing Kelsey, he was back at school. Fourth grade was ridiculous. Why did he have to care about any of this? He didn't care about missions or pony expresses. Why did he need to know the area of anything or a fraction? He just didn't care. He wanted to be out in the world.

His only moments of happiness were lunch and recess. He would sit with Christopher and Kristi and throw rocks through the chain link fence onto the street outside.

"You wanna go to Cunningham Park after school?" Joey asked.

"I can't. I have dance class. I hate ballet. Those girls are mean," Kristi said.

"Then why do you go?" Christopher asked.

"'Cause my parents. They want me to be like famous. I have ballet and then I have singing and piano and…"

"You can never play that sucks," Joey said.

"I know. It's just-"

"Aren't you now a Beauty Queen?" Christopher asked.

"Don't even say that in public. That was so my mom's idea. She wanted me to be Miss Little Queens Supreme. At least I gotta a lot of candy."

"Really? You get candy if you go in a beauty pageant?" Joey asked.

"Tons. You have to get up like really, really early so you get like...I think my mom called it Jumping Juice. It was pixie sticks and soda mixed together," Kristi said.

"That sounds wild. I wanna be in a beauty pageant. I want that," Joey said.

"You're too fugly to be in a beauty pageant," Christopher remarked.

"Oh, please asshole. You were born from one of your mother's farts," Joey shot back.

"Hey, kid," Tony yelled as he and Carmela pulled up to the sidewalk just outside the school. Joey, Kristi and Christopher jumped up and walked up to the fence. Tony was in one of the coolest cars Joey had ever seen. "Come play with us."

"We can't. Recess bell's gonna ring soon," Joey said.

"Fuck the bell," Tony said.

"We're gonna grab a bite and we got big news," Carmela said.

"What's the news?" Joey asked.

"Come with us," Tony said.

"We'll be right there," Joey said as he, Christopher and Kristi ran towards a gate that led to the outside. Sometimes it was locked, sometimes it was not. No one really seemed to pay too much attention to them as they walked outside and ran to the blue Cadillac and jumped in the back. Tony sped off as Joey turned back to watch the school becoming smaller and smaller. He didn't ask any more questions. Just happy to be away from whatever the hell was going on back there. They soon arrived at Sparks Steakhouse in the city. Tony parked and the group got out, walking in to see it packed with everyone. Blundetto, Sal, Artie, Davey, everyone whom Tony considered in his inner circle. It was clearly a party, for what, Joey still had no clue. He had always wanted to go to Sparks but his parents always complained about how expensive it was but there he stood in the midst of what seemed like a huge celebration.

"Whoa," Joey said he looked around at the red and green flowery printed carpet and mahogany walls. Tony draped his arm around Joey's shoulders.

"Kid, order whatever the hell you want," Tony said.

"Is this place for really rich people?" Joey asked.

"Don't ask questions, I'm getting married."

"Married?"

"Me and Carmela. You'll be at the wedding, don't worry. I'll have you be the ring bearer or a groomsman. Haven't decided," Tony said.

"Do I get to be in your wedding?" Christopher asked.

"Why would you be?" Tony asked. "Order stuff, don't worry about the price. It's taken care of."

"How?" Kristi asked.

"Your girlfriend's funny," Tony said as he walked off to find Carmela.

"How come you get to be in the wedding and I don't?" Christopher asked.

"Who the fuck cares? I'm gonna order me four plates of steak," Joey said walking over towards a table and sitting himself down. Kristi and Christopher sat on either side of him. Joey grabbed the menu and looked at it.

"But it doesn't seem fair," Christopher said.

"I know. Only three lamb chops and not four," Joey said.

"They don't even have prices on the menus," Kristi said.

"My dad said that's how you know you're in a fancy place," Joey said. "Live lobsters."

"Oh, they have to kill those to make them dead," Kristi said.

"Score," Joey said.

"You're stupid," Christopher said.

"You're an asshole. This restaurant has no idea how much I can eat," Joey said. "How much is five and half pounds of lobster?"

"We learned that in class last week. We did an experiment," Kristi said.

"Oh, I was too busy looking at Michaela Martin. She wears a bra?" Joey asked.

"No she doesn't. Her big sister had her boobs done so Michaela stole one of her bras and stuffed it with Kleenex. Seriously, drop juice on her and watch her absorb," Kristi said.

"I will," Joey said, making a mental note to do that. For now though, he would eat and eat he did. He ordered the five and a half pound lobster, steak, cheesecake, chocolate truffle and put every ounce of it away. It was truly a wonderful party, a wonderful day and Joey had eaten way too much.

The joy of the day quickly ended when Tony had driven in front of Joey's house. He knew he was in deep trouble. Kristi's parents didn't seem to mind when they dropped her off, just that they were late to ballet class, Christopher's parents weren't home but he knew. He knew his parents would be livid and as soon as Tony turned off the car, Gloria and Joseph Senior raced out of the house. Joseph grabbed Joey by the arm as Gloria began yelling at Tony.

"Where the hell were you?" Gloria asked, screaming.

"Celebrating. I'm getting married, chill," Tony said.

"Don't take my kid out of school without my permission," Gloria said.

"Don't yell at him," Joey yelled.

"Get in the house," Gloria yelled.

"No, don't yell at him," Joey yelled.

Joseph Senior grabbed Joey by the arm to pull him in the house but Joey managed to wriggle free. He began to race down the street when his dad caught him and began spanking him in full view of everyone. He could not be spanked in front of Tony.

"No, no, spanking. Stop," Joey cried, trying to get away but his dad kept spanking him. When he was done, the Senior Joseph pulled Joey into the house and demanded Joey go to his room. Instead he ran to the window and watched as his mother screamed at Tony.

"Go to your room," Joseph Senior said again, trying to grab Joey's arm but Joey wouldn't have it.

Joseph Senior let out a loud, sad sigh, almost giving up as went to sit back at the table.

"You know, Joey….Tony isn't...you shouldn't want to be like him," Joseph Senior said.

"Why not?" Joey said.

"'Cause… Tony isn't….you can do better son," Joseph Senior said.

"No, no….I wanna be like him when I grow up. I do and why would spank me in front of Tony," Joey said, turning towards the window to see Tony drive off. He heard the front door open and slam and soon Gloria appeared in the kitchen, glaring at him.

"Why did you yell at Tony?" Joey asked.

"You're going back to school tomorrow and you're not playing with Tony anymore," Gloria said, trying to hold back her anger.

"Why not? Tony is my friend," Joey said.

"He's seventeen, almost eighteen," Gloria said.

"He's my brother. I wanna be like him," Joey said.

"No, you don't," Gloria said.

"I do. We went to Sparks Steak House. I had five and a half pounds of lobster, steak and lots of dessert and-it was awesome and I hate you," Joey said, sobbing.

Gloria wanted to be furious but instead anger she almost felt sad. She felt sad that her son idolized Tony so much. She was scared too, terrified that her son would grow up to be like him. "I wanted to yell and scream," she told me when I talked to her for this story. "But I couldn't do it. I saw hero worship in him and I didn't know what to do." I couldn't interview anyone related to Tony, no one would speak to me.

"You must be stuffed," Gloria said, instead of yelling.

"No, I could have some dinner" Joey said, confused.

Gloria let out a snort and walked towards Joey, gently placing her hand on his chin. She leaned in and kissed his forehead which shocked him a bit. Joey though he would for sure get in more trouble but his mom seemed tired. He hated when his mom was strangely calm, it was almost like she was so angry she had to control herself.

"Mom, are you okay?" Joey asked.

"I don't want you to be like Tony," Gloria said.

"Why not?" Joey asked.

"I just don't," Gloria said. "I'll make you a pizza."

"Yes, please," Joey nodded.

He just didn't get it. What was wrong with being like Tony? He didn't have to go to school, he didn't have to do anything. He hung out all day with Carmela and did stuff. It just seemed like so much fun. So much more fun than going to school.

The next day, after school, Tony met him on the front steps of his house. His parents had reluctantly lifted the ban. Gloria said she lifted it because there wasn't much else they could do. She knew the ban wouldn't last and she'd have to hope that at some point Joey would figure it out. He did figure it out, but it would be a few more decades before that happened. All she could now was just hope that her kid was smart enough to make the right choices.

"Cunningham?" Tony asked, riding his bike up to the steps and sitting down beside him.

"I'm not allowed," Joey said as he bit into a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.

"Oh, sucks."

"Tony...yesterday...do they..."

"Oh, kid...protection for life. I'm protecting you, you got my word. So anyone messes with you on this street or any other street...you let me know, I'll knock 'em in."

"My mom and dad don't want me to be like you."

"Ehhh, they don't have to worry."

"You're getting married."

"Yeah."

"Neat. I still wanna be like you, Tony."

Tony grinned as he put his arm around Joey. Joey continued eating as Tony talked about his wedding to Carmela although he wasn't really listening. He kept thinking about his parents and Tony. He just didn't get it. He told me how he believed Tony could do no wrong at that point. Tony was just perfect. He represented this ideal although he wasn't entirely sure what the ideal was. He just knew he wanted to become it.

 **Phoebe**

 **December 1977**

Barry, Brad, Phoebe and Leslie were sitting in a treehouse fort in the back of Barry's house, eating marshmallows and drinking hot cocoa, celebrating the end of 1977. She loved being at Barry's house. His mom always had so much food. It freezing in the fort but the four nine-year-olds didn't really care. They were bundled up and there was snow all around them. Below them, Barry's kid brother Adam was filming them with a camera he had gotten for Hanukkah. He was allowed to film but he wasn't allowed in the fort.

"Can I come up?" Adam asked, yelling.

"No, buttface," Barry yelled.

"We could let him up," Phoebe said.

"No, we can't. The rules of tree house fort," Barry said.

"He does look cold. He's shivering in his jacket," Leslie said.

"It will make him strong," Barry said.

Phoebe laughed as she reached for another marshmallow. It was cold. Very cold. Inside the house, she could see Barry's older sister Erica with her friend Lainey. They were dancing around Erica's room, clearly singing to something. She smiled as she bit into her marshmallow.

"Wonder what they're singing to?" Leslie asked, noticing it as well.

"Something stupid. Probably Foreigner. They've been playing them forever. It's stupid," Barry said.

"Foreigner is not stupid," Brad said.

"Yes, it is," Barry said.

"Let me come up," Adam yelled again.

"I kinda wanna go inside. See what they're doing," Leslie said.

"You're ditching the fort dreams," Barry said.

"We're not ditching it, it's just….it is cold," Phoebe said.

"Plus your mom is coming," Leslie said, pointing towards the sliding glass door.

Sure enough, Barry's mom came storming out towards the tree fort. Phoebe loved Barry's mom. She wore insanely crazy sweaters and was always feeding them something.

"I want you in the house, you're all going to freeze to death," Barry's mom screamed.

"Mom, we're fine," Barry yelled back.

"Hey, morons….get in the house," Barry's dad yelled from the doorway. Phoebe noticed his strange outfit although it no longer fazed her. He was wearing a sweater, his boxers and socks. He always took off his pants as soon as he walked in the house and there was never any convincing him to put them back on.

"I have cookies," Barry's mom said.

"Ooo, cookies," Leslie said.

"And Bradley, I have the soundtrack to Annie," Barry's mom said.

"Oh, I am outta here," Brad said.

"Me too," Leslie said.

"Can't beat cookies," Phoebe said.

"You are leaving me for cookies and girl music?" Barry asked.

"Yeah," Phoebe said.

Barry sighed, realizing he was out of choices as they all came down from the fort. Adam was grinning at them, happy to be part of the group.

"Murray, go put on pants, we have company," Barry's mom yelled towards Barry's dad.

"They're in my house. Like hell I'm putting on pants," Barry's dad yelled.

Inside the house, it was far warmer and so much different than her home. There was always food cooking and she loved Barry's parents. She loved how they would just yell at each other but it was never mean or fighting, it was just how they spoke. She loved watching them too, when she grabbed a cookie, she noticed Barry's dad walk by Barry's mom and quickly give her a kiss before yelling about something else. They were sweet. So different than her parents.

It wasn't just Barry's parents she loved, she also adored his sister Erica and her friend Lainey. They would let her and Leslie hang out with them and comb their hair and give them makeovers. They were twelve and seemed so much cooler. They could also sing, they would sing into hairbrushes and Erica would play the guitar. She would even teach Phoebe chords to play on her own. They even spent several hours learning guitar music for Annie. Erica even wrote down sheet music for her. Being in Barry's home was like living in a fantasy, in a bubble where nothing could hurt her.

"I wish I lived here," Phoebe said, sitting on Erica's bed as Erica practiced French braiding Phoebe's hair.

"Oh, you don't wanna live here. My mom would drive you nuts," Erica said.

Phoebe wasn't so sure about that. She wanted a mom like that. A mom who seemed like she wanted to take care of everyone else. Her mom seemed to spend so much time in bed and lately she was never sure what her step-dad was doing. She liked this bubble.

Of course every fantasy has to end and the next day after the biggest breakfast she had ever eaten, Barry's mom pulled up in front of her house. Leslie quickly left the car after saying a quick thank you and ran across the street to her house while Phoebe stayed put.

"Oh, honey, I have food for you. It's in the trunk," Barry's mom said.

"I wanna live with you."

"Sweetie."

"No, no...I'm sorry."

"Hey, you're always welcome. Okay."

"Thanks," Phoebe said.

She grabbed bags of food from the trunk and walked up the driveway towards her door. Once inside, it was dark. So not the warmth from Barry's house. It was a little cold as well. When she opened the fridge to put the food away, she was a little shocked that there was a lot of food already there. Maybe someone had brought stuff over. She put the food away and after putting some stuff on a plate, she walked upstairs, dropped her stuff outside Jeff and her mom's door and walked in with her plate of food. Jeff was there, getting ready for something.

"Hey, Pheebs…." Jeff said.

"Jeff, where are you going?" Phoebe asked.

"Work."

"Today?"

"Gotta get the money," Jeff said.

With that, he tousled her hair which messed up the French braid Erica had done that morning. She didn't say anything though except looking at the clock, she let out a sigh. It was close to noon.

"Mom?" Phoebe asked.

"Hey, sweetie," Lily said.

"I brought you food. Did you eat yesterday?"

"I wasn't hungry."

"Mom, you have to eat. Jeff, why didn't you make her eat."

"I tried," Jeff said.

Phoebe let out a sigh as she lay next to her mother. Jeff gave a smile and walked out of the room. Phoebe gently shook Lily and proceeded to feed her mom a little bit of the lasagna that Barry's mom had made.

"Good."

"Yeah, Barry's mom made it. It was really fun. I like their house. I like her mom," Phoebe said.

"Do you like her better than me?" Lily asked.

"No, no...it's….it's different. His mom is...well, she doesn't sleep a lot like you do but it's different and she cooks a lot, a lot but not all moms cook."

"I'm a horrible mother. I failed."

"No, no….you're the best and you're beautiful and everything and you're my mother and you'll always be my mother. You know, Barry's sister, Erica….she taught me a little guitar last night. She taught me how to play 'the sun will come out, tomorrow….betcha your bottom dollar that tomorrow there'll be sun. So stick up your chin and grin and say-"

"Oh, honey….no. I just….let mommy sleep."

"Tomorrow. Okay. Well, I'll put the lasagna over here," Phoebe said.

She placed the plate down and walked out of the room, grabbed her stuff and walked towards her room where she saw Ursula on her bed, reading a Mrs. Nelson is Missing book which was a favorite of both of them.

"Hey, how was the sleepover at Penny's house?" Phoebe asked.

"Fun. Her mom made me so much food," Ursula said.

"Me too. Barry's mom doesn't leave the kitchen."

"I know, same with Penny's mom. She baked a cake. We each got an individual cake to decorate."

"That's so cool."

"I made you one but….then I ate it."

"Oh, okay….I understand."

"Phoebe...do you think...why isn't mom like that? Do you wonder why?"

"Yeah...yeah, I do."

"I mean, Penny's mom also gave me packages of food when she dropped me off."

"Barry's mom did too...I was wondering why we had so much food in our fridge. Well, Mom is….Mom."

"Do you think she'll feel better?"

"I hope so."

Ursula nodded as she turned back to her book. Phoebe walked towards the closet and grabbed her guitar and sat on her bed. She reached into her bag and grabbed the Annie sheet music that Erica had written for her and slowly began to practice. She kept looking at Ursula who didn't seem to mind. She would just practice and they would just accept this….it was their world.

 **Chandler**

 **November 1978**

It was Monday, mid-afternoon and nine year old Chandler Bing sat waiting in what become his normal spot at the principal's office. Maybe it was those comedy movies, but he was getting a reputation as a prankster. He kept getting caught though and he would find himself sitting in the mahogany chair, staring at Principal Allens, a guy with round glasses. Chandler had gone too far this time, he knew he had. He should never have spray painted the words, "I Seymour Butts Daily" on the wall of the school. But it was funny, he thought it was funny and he was impressed with his ability to spell all words correctly. But the principal had not found it funny at all and he had been caught, red spray paint still on his hands and was immediately dragged into the office. He had been told he was suspended immediately for two whole weeks and now they were just waiting on his parents. It was becoming a common occurrence. He would pull a prank, people would laugh and then he'd get suspended and then wait for his parents.

"They're not coming," Chandler whispered.

"They're coming. You know, if you don't start behaving, you're going to end up in jail one day," Principal Allens said, which he didn't quite believe but he was tired. He was tired of seeing Chandler in his office, tired of knowing why he was doing this and as they were waiting for his mother to pick him or his dad, the principal's fears were confirmed.

"John," Gladys, the secretary, poked her head into the office. She was an older lady with her hair tied back in a bun and wearing a red dress with white flowers. "I can take him home."

"Gladys-"

"His parents aren't coming, John," Gladys said.

Chandler could feel his heart drop as he looked down at his hands and then back up at the principal. Suddenly, the eyes that had once been filled with anger were now filled with sympathy.

"If you want attention, ask," Principal Allens said.

"I've been asking," came Chandler's reply. "No one's listening."

"I'm listening. Vandalizing school property to get my attention is not good."

"I wanna go home," Chandler said

"I'll take him," Gladys said, again.

"Yeah," Chandler said.

He jumped off the chair and grabbed his backpack from the floor. He walked towards the secretary who placed her arm around him and led him out the door. He walked in silence as Gladys opened her car door and let Chandler in the passenger side. Chandler still stared quietly out the window as Gladys drove out of the parking lot.

"Will there be people at home?" Gladys said.

"Yeah."

"You know, you're a good kid Chandler, You do hear that, right?" Gladys asked.

"I guess. Am I still suspended?"

"I think so. Although, between you and me, that was funny. There's a time and a place, though. Unfortunately, spray-painted in red across the wall of the school...not the right time or place."

"Okay...I guess."

Chandler sat in silence as Gladys drove the rest of the way to his house. Once there, Chandler got out and stared at the huge home that stood before him. He walked straight into his theater. It had become his sanctuary. He could be taken anywhere he wanted. It was the best part of being suspended. He just kept watching, movie after movie, losing all track of time until he was startled by a voice coming from above him.

"So you got suspended," Charles said as he sat next to him.

"How do you know?" Chandler asked.

"I called the school back."

"Finally."

"Chandler."

"Don't. I wanna watch," Chandler said.

There was something going on. Something different. Ever since he had gotten the theater, his parents had been even more distant. There had been that one moment for his birthday the previous year but that was it. That moment had passed and now, he felt like he was trying to get someone to see him, to notice him.

"Dad," Chandler said, looking up.

"Yeah."

"Do you love me?"

"Of course."

"Does mom?"

"Yes."

"Okay."

Chandler turned to continue watching as Charles lowered his arm and placed it around Chandler's shoulders. Chandler looked up at his dad as they sat and continued to watch. Nothing else was said and neither one really wanted to say anything. His mom never said anything either. After watching movies, he went downstairs to the club with his dad where the parties were and watched his parents dancing around. He felt lonely. He wanted to be back at school, he wanted to pull pranks and make people laugh but it didn't seem like that would happen.

He also could not ignore the tension. It was becoming worse and worse. His parents who never got along were now simply no longer speaking to each other. He thought maybe Thanksgiving might bring some relief to that tension but instead, his world simply imploded. It was dinner and his parents were telling him how they were divorcing. Charles had fallen in love with the house boy, Ramon. He kept watching them as they spoke, his head spinning. He needed to leave, he needed to get out, he needed something. He got up and ran outside, he ran as far as he could until his legs gave out and he leaned against a tree. He began throwing up. The Thanksgiving dinner, in reverse. The turkey, the stuffing, the cranberry sauce, the yams...all coming back. When he was done, he sat, wrapped his arms around his knees as his body shook. He could not stop crying as he rocked back and forth, look up towards the night. He could see stars sprinkling the sky, wondering if he could transport himself, maybe transport himself into one of those comedy movies.

"Chandler," Charles said as he walked towards his son and sat next to him.

"Leave me alone," Chandler said, his throat hoarse.

"Please let me speak. You know your mother and I have not been happy for a long time. I'm gay. I tried to hide it. I tried to be something I wasn't but I couldn't do it-"

"Can't you try harder?"

"No. Look, in order for me to be a better parent, I need to be happy with me."

"What about me?" Chandler asked.

"You'll be fine."

"Are you leaving?" Chandler asked.

"Tomorrow morning. Ramon and I are taking a flight to Florida. We're going to start a burlesque."

"Congratulations."

"You will be fine and I still love you."

Chandler shrugged and got up. He walked back towards the house. As he walked back inside, the smell of Thanksgiving food still lingered and it made him sick to his stomach. It was then that he made a pact to himself, that he would never eat Thanksgiving food again for as long as he lived. He couldn't. He didn't have to deal with the smell for too long as shortly after, there was an "End of the Marriage" party at the club that was located in the basement of their home. Chandler sat on one of the red cushions, watching the grown ups around him gyrating to loud music that pulsated through the room. It was so loud, Chandler could feel his bones vibrating. He could see his father and Ramon off at one of the tables, kissing in between snorting lines of cocaine. Chandler rolled his eyes as his mother, Nora, wearing a tube top and a mini skirt plopped herself down next to Chandler and handed him a drink.

"Here you go, son," Nora said. "This will help you."

"What is it?"

"Jack and coke. I know you've had a rough week with being suspended and now this. So you can use a drink."

"I'm nine years old, mom."

"I know. I'll monitor your intake."

Chandler squinted at his mom in the darkness as he reached for the glass and brought it to his lips, downing the drink. The drink burned his throat, but felt surprisingly good. He kept drinking more until he was sufficiently drunk. He liked that feeling of being drunk. He could forget if he was drunk. He wasn't sure what time it was but at some point in the party, he stole a large bottle of Jack Daniels from the bar and made his way to the theater where he loaded up those old comedies again and sat while his parents celebrated the end of their marriage downstairs, Chandler drank from his bottle of Jack Daniels as if he were downing soda and soon passed out to the sounds of Animal House. When he woke the next morning, he had a pounding headache. He stumbled out of the room and into a large empty house. He walked towards the front door and opened it. It was there he saw an image that would forever be ingrained in his head. His father and Ramon getting into the car, backing out and leaving. Chandler kept wondering if his father would turn back, if his dad would say goodbye and Charles did turn back, for a brief second and locked eyes with his son. Chandler desperately wanted him to say something but Charles never did. Instead, he got in the car and drove off. Chandler told me how he felt changed after that moment. That was the moment everything just changed. His dad didn't say goodbye. It was a turning point. Nothing mattered more than the realization that his dad couldn't even say goodbye.


	7. Chapter 7

This part of the story was difficult to listen to even though it happened thirty eight years ago. Rick Green is in his eighties now. A wrinkly old man who still denies he had done anything. He is Rachel's dad's older brother. Rachel has refused to even speak to him. Rachel's dad really doesn't speak to him either and getting Chandler to discuss it so openly was difficult.

"This story is going to make me look an ass," he joked.

"Or brave," came Monica's retort.

He let out a sigh as he looked at his three children who are now teenagers. Erica and Jack, now thirteen and Sophie, twelve. As I was sitting with them, the trio are sitting on the couch doing homework. All three were children they didn't think they would ever have. Chandler's face turned a little darker as he shifted in his seat. He knew this was going to be hard. He knew what he had signed up for but I want to know about The Six. I want to know the workings, the beauty, the struggles. He does such good now, he's been sober for sixteen years. He runs interventions, he's a sponsor and gives back, giving lectures on sobriety. He's given his number to people who say they need help. He is an open book in most aspects. Except this.

"He raped me," he said, quietly. His mouth barely forming the words as he looked back at Sophie, Jack and Erica who suddenly looked up. He had tried to whisper it but certain words get immediate reactions.

I should also make a note here that I did ask Rick to give his side. I asked if he had a response to what Chandler had described but he denied it or perhaps it was a sign that his mind was deteriorating with the effects of old age. He now lives in an old age home. Leonard Green had paid for that. He had discovered his old brother living in a studio apartment in squalor, ready to be evicted and moved him into a retirement center. Rick doesn't get too many visitors. Rachel and her sisters refuse and every once a month Leonard goes to pay the rent. Rick might still deny his actions but his family does not.

"I believe Chandler Bing," Leonard Green said when I asked him. "I'd rather not get into how I know or why I so strongly believe him….but what Chandler says Rick did. I believe it."

Leonard said that with such sadness in his tone. Had there been people before Chandler? After? Was Leonard one of his brother's victims? He said no when I tried to press further. He refused to speak more on the topic, just the repeating that he fully believed what happened.

I brought that back to Chandler when I was trying to get the story. He simply nodded but it was when he said the statement out loud, when he knew his children heard it. He knew there was no turning back. I applaud him as I do most things. The others applaud him as well.

"He's kinda my hero now," Phoebe said.

"He's amazing. Everything he's done for people...he's helped so many," Rachel said, tearing up.

"He's my brother. Love the man," Joey said.

"He's really just a different person, yeah, a hero," Ross said.

"My hero," Monica said.

Chandler laughed at those compliments, finding them rather ridiculous. He's not a hero, he explained. He's just some guy who was forced to get sober. Who had to choose a different life for himself or he would not have a life.

"I don't know if I want-" Chandler said.

"Wait, dad...what do you mean?" Erica asked.

"I was kinda weak as a kid," Chandler said.

"No way….you're Batman," Jack grinned.

Monica let out a snort as Chandler beamed at that nickname. He had transformed his man cave into a shrine to Batman. The movies are still there, but now it's dedicated to Batman and as a joke sometimes, Sophie, Jack and Erica will call him that.

"I am Batman," Chandler said.

"Oh, you are not Batman," Monica said.

"I am too Batman," Chandler said.

"There's no way out," I said.

"I know….G-d, I hate telling this. But I still want you three to know...I am Batman," Chandler said.

"You are not Batman," Monica said.

"Do not crush my dreams," Chandler said. "Okay, okay-"

"Do we need to discuss it in the Bat Cave," Jack said which is what the man cave is now called.

"No, no...okay, no turning back. Yeah, I was raped when I was ten by Rick Green."

 **April, 1979**

After Chandler's parents' divorce, things began spiraling faster for the nine year old. After Thanksgiving, the parties increased and Chandler was surrounded by alcohol that flowed like water and drugs that were as readily available as candy and while the house were full of adults, no one was there to really watch Chandler. There was no one there to truly discipline him, although some of his mother's boyfriends tried. There was one who kept spanking him, Rick. Every time Chandler did something wrong and it was often, Rick would pull Chandler across his knee and proceed to spank him. Rick was tall, far scarier than he is now. He would loom over Chandler.

"He needs to learn discipline," Rick said as Chandler lay on his lap.

"Maybe he should have a drink first before you spank him," came his mother's reply.

"No, it needs to hurt."

Chandler let out a snort, "well, why don't you argue about it and I can leave?"

"See, your son is a smart ass," Rick said as he smacked Chandler, hard on his bottom. Chandler winced a little. It wasn't just a spanking, Chandler said. It really felt more like a beating. He would have welts after those spankings. He always seemed to find something Chandler did wrong.

It was Chandler's birthday weekend. He was turning ten and had found himself again, getting suspended from school. His birthday was on a Sunday that year. He was going to have a party on a Saturday or at least he thought. He had thought with his dad no longer at home, he would be able to get kids to come but his friends' parents did not want them to come. The rejections came, no one was coming to his tenth birthday and it was because of his mom. So he reacted in the only way he knew how. This time he had saran wrapped every toilet in the school and was in the process of gluing everything to the teacher's desk when he was caught and dragged to the principal's office.

"Chandler," Principal Allens had said, shaking his head.

"How long will I be suspended this time?" Chandler asked.

"I know parents getting divorced is rough, but there is a time and place for pranks and for being silly-"

"How long am I suspended this time?" Chandler asked. He did not want to talk about his feelings. Ever since the divorce, Chandler had been dragged to therapists who asked him questions about his emotions. He would always end up spending the hour making them laugh. He had an audience. He did not want to discuss what was going on. He knew what was going on at home and knew that his life was different from the other kids and not in a good way.

"Two weeks. Maybe we can offer your mom the name of a therapist."

"I don't want a therapist."

It was around this time, unbeknownst to anyone else, that Principal Allens was becoming severely worried about the Bing home and began to look into filing a complaint with Child Services. I brought this find up with Chandler and he didn't know that Allens was behind it and at the time, he just assumed everyone wanted him to go to therapy but it wasn't therapy that he needed. He sat there once again, in the principal's office, waiting for his mom to pick him up which of course, she did not. The secretary, Gladys once again dropped him off.

"You know, Chandler," Gladys said as she stared at him from the driver's seat.

"Stop. Ms. Gallion wasn't gonna celebrate my birthday in class today because I didn't earn a party and my mom forgot to bring stuff anyway. No one is coming to my birthday tomorrow because of my mother. I haven't spoken to my dad in six months. Stop."

With that Chandler, jumped out of the car and walked into his house. He immediately walked towards the theater, his own private sanctuary and began watching _Blazing Saddles,_ followed by some Laurel and Hardy. He was in the middle of watching, _Duck Soup_ when suddenly Rick walked in and violently grabbed him by the arm and dragged him out of the theater where he pulled Chandler onto his lap and proceeded to spank him. His mother, Nora, stood nearby.

"But honey, I really think he needs a few drinks before you do that," Nora said.

"He needs to learn some lessons," Rick said.

"Chandler, sweetie...what did you do? Why did you get suspended again?" Nora said as she crouched down in front of Chandler and ran her fingers through his hair.

"Because he's a bad kid," Rick said.

"You heard the man," Chandler said which resulted in another whack on his bottom.

"Maybe you do need to be spanked more," Nora said.

"Well, at least you found a guy will do it. Ouch," Chandler said as he got another whack. He let out a sigh as Rick continued. He shut his eyes and tried to think of other things. He would soon be allowed to go back and watch _Duck Soup_. As images of the movie flashed in his head, he felt something against his stomach. It was a familiar hard feeling. Rick was turned on. Chandler knew that but he was pretty sure his mom did not. He never said anything, but he could feel it.

When the Rick was done, Chandler got up, Rick grabbed Nora's hand and they practically skipped off. Chandler rubbed his bottom as he turned and walked towards the theater again and continued to watch the movie. He couldn't cry anymore. He did for awhile. When his parents first divorced, he cried everyday but his mom seemed to move on quickly. Every few weeks there would be a new boyfriend. Rick was just the latest. He and Nora had been dating for three weeks and he immediately took it upon himself to be the one to discipline Chandler and it was that first time when Chandler had felt the hardness on his stomach that he knew this wasn't going to work out well for him but he could not say anything.

Chandler spent the night in the theater, watching movie after movie, leaving only to get food and go to the bathroom. He was safe in that theater. No one could harm him. The world could pass outside, but nothing bad could happen in there. It was his spot.

"Sweetie?"

It was now Saturday. He was sure of that, but he wasn't sure the time. His mom was dressed in a skin tight red sequined dress which was also very low cut. Chandler looked up at her and let out a sigh.

"It's Saturday night. We're having a party for you downstairs," Nora said

"None of the kids in my class could come."

"So? I invited my friends. I'm not going to let my son's tenth go without celebration. I bought you a gift," Nora said.

"Really?" Chandler asked, his eyes brightening a little as his mom handed him a box. He tore off the paper and opened the box. In it was a square package. Chandler picked it up and looked at his mom.

"It's a condom. Now, that you're ten you need to start using protection."

"From what?"

"Oh, honey...you need to be prepared."

"Yeah...well, thanks mom. This is much better than the Richard Pryor comedy album I asked for two weeks ago," Chandler muttered.

"Oh, Richard Pryor has too much bad language. I don't want you listening to that. Come on, let's play."

Chandler looked up at his mom and stuffed the condom in his pocket. He knew his mother wouldn't leave until he joined her. So he turned off the movie and followed her down the stairs to the club where the party was already in full effect. The room was filled with hot, sweaty and partially naked people, grinding up against each other in tune to some loud song that Chandler couldn't quite recognize. The strobe lights cast colors upon the foam that was now filling the room. Sometimes for special occasions, they would fill that club with foam. Chandler usually thought the bubbles were cool though as he would run through them and try to get as wet as he could but he wasn't feeling up to it.

"Have a seat birthday boy," Nora said as she walked Chandler towards an empty booth and sat him down. Nora jetted off towards the bar. Chandler watched the party. He understood why his classmates parents didn't want them at a party like this. He got it immediately. He wondered if he would ever have a normal kids birthday. He had always wanted to go to Chuck-E-Cheese or spend his birthday at the ice rink where he could play ice hockey. He had wanted birthdays at arcades or anything that could be considered appropriate. He never got those birthdays. He got birthdays like this, a foam party and condoms as a present.

"Here you go," Nora said, handing him a drinking in a small glass. Chandler knew what it was.

"Tequila shot?"

"Happy birthday, son."

"Yeah, who needs mini-golf or a birthday at the batting cages when I can do this instead," Chandler said.

"Oh, those are boring parties."

"But mom...they're things I like to do and if you did those things, maybe some of the kids in my class would have come."

"I refuse to throw my son boring parties because I am not a boring parent. Have your birthday shot."

Chandler downed his shot and let out a groan. The liquid burned his throat. He coughed a little.

"Thanks, mom," Chandler said.

"I also have another gift. See, that woman over there? She's a stripper. I paid her five hundred bucks to give you a lap dance," Nora grinned. "I want you to learn how to be free with your sexuality."

"Mom, look where I've spent the last ten years. I think I'm open about my sexuality."

"Hold on."

Chandler rolled his eyes as his mom got up and ran off. What would it take for someone to listen to him? To hear him, no one seemed to be doing that. His mom soon came back with a woman who did look a little bit like a supermodel in the darkness of the club.

"Am I the best mother or what?" Nora asked.

"Or what?"

The woman whose name was Maxi Johnson smiled as she leaned down and gave Chandler a kiss on the head and then proceeded to dance around him, touching him which he did enjoy. His mom kept bringing him shots so Chandler kept getting drunk.

After the lap dance, Maxi left to go dance with someone else and Nora was dragged off by Rick so Chandler was left alone. He wanted to get out of there, see a movie. Chandler stumbled towards the bar and walked behind it, stealing a giant bottle of Jose Cuervo. He stumbled out of the club and up the stairs to the theater where he opened the door. He turned on _Animal House_ and began watching.

He wasn't sure when he had passed out, but for the rest of his life, he would remember when he woke up. He felt Rick's hand on his stomach and woke up to find him unbuttoning his jeans.

"What are you doing? Stop," Chandler groaned as he tried to push away but Rick's grip was too strong. Rick grabbed him up and put Chandler over his knee.

"You're a very bad boy," Rick said as he spanked Chandler, harder than he had been spanked before.

"Stop, you're hurting me," Chandler cried.

"If you were good, I wouldn't be hurting you. It's your fault for being so bad and if you tell your mother, I'll do this again."

"Please stop," Chandler moaned.

Chandler felt weak, but he still couldn't cry and Rick would not stop. He was drunk, he knew that much. Suddenly, Rick flipped him over and he could feel Rick's hand go down Chandler's jeans. That's when things when black again. It was as if Chandler's brain knew something was going to happen and did him the favor of shutting down. He felt numb as if he were outside his body.

When he woke up again, he had a blinding headache. He was alone and looked up to see the screen had gone dark. His pants were around his ankles and he felt an intense pain running up and down his entire body. He brought his knees up to his chest and wrapped his arms around his knees. It was then that he started crying. He was completely alone. He hated Rick for what he had done. Rick had destroyed the only place Chandler felt safe.

Nora Bing knew something was wrong. She felt sick when I told her this days after my interview with Chandler. "I was spiraling. I wasn't in a good place and I let Chandler down in the worst way. I will never forgive myself. I -I don't know"

Rick had crawled into bed with her later that night. He seemed so out of it, Nora recalled. He seemed just strange but she couldn't really figure out why.

"Where were you?" Nora asked.

"Getting a nightcap," Rick said.

"Tomorrow should be fun," Nora said, lying next to Rick, "seeing your brother and your nieces. One of them is around Chandler's age, right?"

"Yeah...Rachel? Yeah...no, I don't think Chandler should come."

"What? Why not?"

"He's suspended from school. He's been incredibly bad, he shouldn't be rewarded."

"But….he's my kid and he might have fun."

"No."

With that, it seemed like the end of the story. There was no other discussion of whether or not Chandler should come. The next day, Nora went into the theater. She saw her son curled up on the floor, lying in fetal position, his pants down and he was surrounded by empty glass bottles of booze.

"Sweetie?" Nora asked, gently touching him.

Chandler felt someone shaking him awake and thought immediately Rick had come back. He jumped up and screamed. Nora was frightened by his demeanor. He was in hysterics.

"No, no, no, no...don't...no," Chandler cried.

"Honey, what's wrong?" Nora asked.

"Nothing."

"What happened?" Nora asked.

"Nothing."

She had never seen him like this. She had never seen him so afraid and she felt truly disgusted. She felt something had gone on. Chandler was terrified. He kept moving away from his mom, the floor felt kinda sticky beneath him.

"You know, Rick and I are going to visit his brother on a boat today. His brother has three girls. One of them is a year younger than you. You might have fun with her."

"I don't wanna go."

"Chandler."

"No, no, leave me alone."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes," Chandler said, tears began filling his eyes. He wanted her to leave.

"Are you ready to go?" Rick asked as he stepped into the theater. Nora looked over at Chandler who looked even more terrified. She could feel her heart beating. "Oh, Chandler there you are. Rough night?"

"No," Chandler whimpered.

"Come and give me a hug before your mother and I leave," Rick said.

"No," Chandler said.

"Honey, he doesn't have to," Nora said.

"Yes, he does. Nora, he needs to learn directions."

"I don't want to….please don't make me," Chandler said, looking at Nora. He was crying. Nora looked at both Chandler and Rick and she would regret this next sentence "hug him."

"Mom," Chandler whimpered.

He looked at Rick who stood grinning with his arms open. Chandler slowly walked towards him and Rick enveloped him in his arms. Nora felt herself starting to cry. She was making too many mistakes. She was making errors. She didn't see Rick as a man she loved. Chandler turned at looked at her and that look of terror increased in his eye. He no longer felt safe, Nora could tell and she felt it was her fault. She had made it unsafe.

Maybe it was a mother's intuition but Nora knew. She knew she had to break up with him. She knew something had happened and that entire ride to the boat, she could barely speak.

Leonard and Sandra Green had a huge boat. They took it out every April. Friends and family would come, it became a thing. Rachel loved them. She had thought maybe she wouldn't be allowed to go at first because she had painted the walls of Jill's bedroom but she was thrilled when she got to go. She was especially excited to see her Uncle Rick. It disgusts her now to think about how much she adored him.

"I still think he belongs in prison, but I guess dying alone in a nursing home will be sufficient," Rachel says now. "It pains me how much I adored that man."

Nora barely spoke to Rick on the ride to the boat. Rick was just talking about his nieces and how much he loved them but all she could think about was Chandler that morning, screaming at her touch. She felt she should not be there.

"Rachel," Rick said as he stepped onto the boat. Rachel, who had been playing with Jill, ran towards him as he lifted her up and spun her around in the air. He still held her, carrying her as she rested her head on his shoulder.

"Uncle Rick!" Rachel yelled.

"Oh, sweetie….this is Nora," Rick said.

"Hi, I'm Rachel."

"Hello, darling. I need to get a drink. In honor of my son's birthday," Nora said, although maybe she needed a drink for another reason. She felt this urge to grab Rachel from Rick and tell her to run away.

"You have a son? Why didn't he come?" Rachel asked.

"He was still hungover from last night," Nora said.

"What?" Rachel asked, a little confused.

"Her son is a terror. Be glad he didn't come. He'd probably burn the ship down," Rick said.

"Oh, Rick," Nora said, patting him on the arm. She hated that made he those jokes. She hated how she was. Rick didn't know her child but she began to wonder if she truly knew her child as well.

"Rachel, I got you a gift," he said as he reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out a copy of "Return From Witch Mountain". Rachel's mouth dropped as she looked at the tape. She had seen the movie the previous year and loved it.

"Oh my G-d. Thank you," Rachel said.

"Where did you get that?" Nora asked.

"I stole it from your kid's collection, is that alright?" Rick asked.

"Oh...does he want it back?" Rachel asked.

"You were in the theater?" Nora asked, her face suddenly getting pale.

Confirmation. That's what she needed. What had he done?

"Yeah, we hung out, watched movies. We had a good time," Rick said.

Nora wanted to throw up. She felt everything collapsing around her. She knew she was a mess. She knew she was acting insane but she had been burned from her marriage, so hurt and shattered. She was destroyed from the divorce and it was the knowledge that in the process, she may have destroyed her own son that made her the sickest of all.

"Rachel, sweetie, where are your sisters? Maybe you girls can watch?" Rick asked.

"Yeah, yeah….they're in the TV room. Amy pushed Jill in the water. It was funny," Rachel said as Rick walked off, still carrying Rachel who was also feeling uncomfortable.

"Speaking of funny, you wanna hear a joke?" Rick asked to which Rachel nodded. Rick was telling Rachel jokes and Nora just felt herself getting angrier and angrier. She could barely move from the doorway and just watched him place Rachel between her two sisters, six year old Jill who was wrapped in a towel and shivering and eleven year old Amy, who looked angry.

"Hi, girls. Are you okay, Jill?" Rick asked.

Jill sniffled a little, "Amy dumped me in water."

"It was an accident. I thought you were Rachel," Amy said.

"You're a stupid head," Rachel said.

"Girls, I brought a video. My friend, Nora," Rick said pointing towards Nora "yes, Nora's son heard I was coming on this boat and gave me a movie to give to you."

"I thought you took it from him?" Rachel asked.

"Well, borrowed without asking. He is not a well behaved kid, not like you three," Rick said.

"Amy dumped me in water," Jill whined again.

"Let's watch," Rick said as he popped the movie in the VCR and set it up and soon the three girls were watching together.

"Rick, can I talk to you privately for a moment?" Nora asked.

Nora could not handle it anymore. She could barely stand. It was all lies. He was lying about her son. He was lying what happened in the movie theater.

"I wanna watch with my girls," Rick said.

"I really need to speak with you," Nora said. Rick let out a sigh and walked out. Amy shuddered.

"Ugh, Uncle Rick is so creepy," Amy said.

"He is not. He's so nice," Rachel said.

"Yes he is creepy, he probably touches little boys," Amy said.

"On purpose?" Jill asked.

"I'm gonna throw you in the water again," Amy said.

"That's such a lie. He doesn't do that. He's a nice uncle," Rachel said.

"Whatever, you two are so dumb," Amy said, rolling her eyes. Rachel looked at Amy curiously. Was Amy being serious? I wondered why Amy thought even then he a was creepy.

"I don't know," Amy told me. "I got this feeling...this vibe. He never did anything to me but just...it was just a vibe."

It was a vibe Amy had even back then. Rachel though could not believe it. She had to find out. She really didn't think that someone who was so nice to her would be so mean. She got up and walked out of the TV room and slowly walked up the stairs and snuck past one of the cabins until she heard their voices.

"What did you do? What did you do?" Nora asked.

"I didn't do anything," Rick said.

"He wasn't feeling well this morning… something happened...what happened last night? If you did something-"

"I didn't do anything. He's a terror. Your kid is a monster."

"He is not a monster. That's too far, he's my child."

"Okay, fine...I'm sorry but it's not like he'll even notice the movie is gone. He has a million movies. Buy him a new copy. He won't know the difference. He's not very bright either."

"Stop, Rick. Just stop. Please tell me….what did you do to him?" Nora asked.

"Nothing. Nothing that he didn't deserve."

Rachel stepped back from the room. She wasn't quite sure she understood what was going on but it freaked her out a little. She walked back towards the TV room and sat back in between Jill and Amy while back in that private room, Nora was still pacing. She was still grasping somewhere. She needed the truth. Or maybe she already knew the truth.

"I want you out of my house," Nora said.

"What? You don't mean that," Rick said. "Your kid is a monster. He has no discipline and-"

"I don't want you disciplining him. What did you do to him?"

"Nothing he didn't deserve."

"I'm gonna call the cops."

That was when Rick turned. He got a look in his eye that terrified Nora. She wondered if he was going to hit her. She wondered if Chandler saw that look last night.

"Don't you fucking dare. You really think you can call the cops? Tell him what? You give your kid booze and have strippers dance on him. Tell the cops and I'll be the least of your problems. He'll get taken away from you so fast," Rick said.

"He won't get taken away from me. You are no longer allowed in my home."

"Don't you fucking dare call the police," Rick said.

Nora just broke down in tears. She had to get off the boat. She had to leave. Sandra Green poked her head into the cabin with a big smile on her face.

"Everything okay in here, we're ready to take off," Sandra said.

"You know, Sandra...I'm feeling really sick. I...if you don't mind, I think I'm gonna go home," Nora said.

"Of course. Is there anything I can do?"

"No, no...thank you. Rick is gonna stay here. I just….I think I need to get home," Nora said.

With that, she could not get off that boat fast enough. Sandra kept staring at Rick and what Nora did not know was Sandra knew some facts about her then brother-in-law. She hated Rick, always did but for Leonard, she gave him a pass. She knew some things as well.

"Women...well, I'm going to hang out with my nieces," Rick said, shrugging as he walked towards Sandra. As he neared Sandra, she gripped his arm but kept staring straight ahead.

"Why don't you go help Leonard on the top deck," Sandra said.

"I'm gonna go hang out with my nieces," Rick said.

Sandra turned towards him, her eyes filled with anger.

"I'm sorry, did I sound like I was asking a question?" Sandra asked. "Go help Leonard. Stay the hell away from my girls."

Sandra walked out of the room and towards Rachel, Amy and Jill who were all happily watching the movie. Jill crawled on to Sandra's lap while Amy was styling Rachel's hair. Nothing more was said about Rick. I wanted to press for more. What did Sandra know? What Leonard know? Amy knew something was up, as well? Were they protecting him? I so want to get to the bottom of this whole thing.

Outside the boat, Nora ran down the marina until she could get a cab which she took back to the house. Once inside, she ran into the theater and saw him sitting there. She sat next to him and he looked up at her. Chandler was a little confused as to why she was there.

"I broke up with Rick. He's not gonna come back here. Chandler, did he-"

"No," Chandler said.

"Please don't lie to me."

"I wanna watch the movie."

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. It's hard. I did love your dad. I'm just….I'm so sorry. I wish I were better."

Chandler looked at his mom, who was crying next to him. He wasn't sure how to react to that. He hated seeing his mom cry, that just didn't seem right.

"I'm sorry," Nora said.

"Um...wanna watch with me?" Chandler asked.

Nora looked over at him and wiped the tears away from her face. She gently placed her arm around him and he immediately flinched.

"Oh, honey."

"No, movie…"

Nora nodded as they turned to watch in the dark. She made a promise to herself to do better although she knew it would be a hard promise to keep and Chandler kept it a secret. Even if Rick was gone, it was still a secret.

Finishing the story, Monica was in tears and Sophie, Jack and Erica stared at him as well. I don't know if maybe they were too young to hear but they know their dad's struggles. They know he doesn't drink. They know he's an alcoholic.

"Dad is Batman," Jack said after some awkward silence.

Jack is so much like Chandler. The sense of humor, the personality is all there. With that line, Chandler laughed.

"I am….although, I'm not sure I should have told the three of you that," Chandler said.

"No, Dad...it's okay. You're safe now and you have us and we protect you," Erica said.

"No. I protect you….'cause I'm Batman."

I love that he told me the story. I love that he opened up. I wish there was more we could do but maybe it can help someone. Maybe he could help someone else? It didn't destroy him, this part of his history. It almost did but it didn't. Shows the strength of man, I guess. We can come back from anything.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chandler**

 **April 1979**

His mom quickly moved on. That was usually how it went. There were a few days of being single for Nora and then she would meet someone new. She met Alex during one of those club parties. He was olive skinned, dark black hair and always had five o'clock shadow. He was younger than Nora, he was about twenty five. She looked at him like a boy toy, her boy toy.

"G-d, I'm going to look so awful in this story," Nora said as we sat across from each other in her penthouse apartment overlooking New York City. "I was young when I married Charles Bing. I mean, I was twenty two. We were babies and I-I always knew something was different but I overlooked so much and...and then...well, right before our wedding, I thought about calling it off. I didn't though. I didn't because I was pregnant. So I stuck it out until he filed for divorce and I was thirty one years old. I was angry. I was so angry. I was angry he did it first when I should have been the one to do it. I was a mess and I spiraled. I was trying to recapture my twenties. I was trying to have it all….I failed. I was not a good mom. Please put this in your book. I don't want to get hate."

As promised.

I kinda believe her and speaking with Chandler now, he believes her. He didn't understand it then, he couldn't have being involved in all that chaos but he got it now.

"I think my parents did the best they could," Chandler says now. "I think they didn't really know and I think they were as people going through a lot. I just didn't get it. They were a couple that should never have gotten married. I mean, I'm glad they did because I'm here but they should never have gotten married."

But they did.

And by 1979, they were completely out of each other's lives. Chandler never saw his father although according to Charles, he had moved to Los Angeles to audition as a performer at Hamburger Mary's. A gay friendly restaurant that was opening a location in Los Angeles. He had gotten a job performing as a drag queen and much like Nora, he was also trying to recapture something.

"I hid for twenty two years," Charles told me, "then I couldn't hide anymore. I left. I went as far as I could from New York which would be Los Angeles. I didn't really think about what Nora or Chandler were doing. I didn't know about Rick until 2001. I wanted to kill him, still do. I knew I had hurt Nora deeply and she really was my best friend but I hurt her and I didn't really care what she did with my house and my money….I knew she was spending it. I gave her everything and more child support then I was required to give. I felt guilty."

"I don't think either one should feel guilty….at least not now," Chandler said when I told him what his parents had said. "Although, at the time I really thought they should. Alex was a tool."

Even though, Alex was a tool. He seemed nice enough. Far nicer than Rick. Alex had a fondness for these little white tablets he kept in an Altoids tin. He kept telling Chandler how awesome and cool they made everything and how they made everything so bright and colorful. Chandler kept wanting to try one, but Alex kept saying no which Chandler at the time found completely unfair. It was like describing the most wonderful candy or the most wonderful toy and then telling him he could not have it.

Other than that, Alex was far better than Rick. Alex would sit with Chandler and watch all those movies. Alex loved those movies and would add more for them to watch. Chandler loved watching the movies with him because he would talk about how the colors were so bright, even during black and white movies. Chandler's entire two week suspension was spent in that movie theater with Alex, watching movies. Alex made the movies so fun with his constant commentary and using words like "groovy" and "out of this world".

When Rick had first left, Nora kept asking if Chandler was okay and if he wanted to see a therapist. Chandler refused. He would try to forget what happened. His mind blocked it out. He liked Alex and kinda hoped Alex would stick around. Alex made his theater happy again. He wanted to forget Rick existed. He wanted to forget any of that had happened. He pushed all that stuff far away.

"I just shoved it down as far as it would go," Chandler told me. "I just shut it off and pretended like it never happened. Of course, as would happen…..you can't really shut it off and not deal with trauma but I tried. For many, many years."

I don't want to get too far yet.

At the end of his two week suspension-yeah, that's right-in two weeks, Nora broke up with one guy and moved another guy right in. "I told you, I was spiraling. Looking back, it makes no sense but I thought also it would somehow erase Rick if I got someone quickly. Chandler would tell me nothing." As he had said, he blocked out. Chandler was shocked when at the end of his suspension, his mom actually dropped him off at school. While at the curb, just before Chandler got out of the car, Nora touched his arm to stop him.

"Honey...I know we never talked about this...the reason Rick and I broke up-"

"Mom, I gotta go."

"Did he touch you?" Nora asked although she knew the answer. She wanted Chandler to say it. She wanted him to tell her what happened in that theater.

"No."

"Chandler, don't lie to me. Please, not about this."

"No, he didn't. I gotta go. I do like Alex though. He's fun."

"Yeah...and if he offers you one of his white tablets, you do not take it."

"I know. I gotta go."

As Chandler got out of the car, Nora watched. When he disappeared, she pulled away and could feel herself starting to cry. She knew something happened. She knew he was not okay but he was trying his best convince her, to convince everyone he was okay.

Chandler was happy to be back at school. He liked it, despite all the trouble he got in. School seemed normal to him. He was good at it and he enjoyed it.

"Hey, Chandler...there you are. Can you come into my office for a second," Principal Allens said. He had been waiting for Chandler to get to school.

"I just got here. What could I have done?" Chandler asked.

"Come here," Principal Allens said and Chandler could hear him mutter, "smart ass" which made him laugh. Chandler followed the principal into his office and sat in the chair. "Alright, kid...it was your birthday?"

"Yeah. Two weeks ago."

"Here you go, Happy Birthday."

Principal Allens handed Chandler a stack of comedy albums. Chandler's mouth dropped open as he read the names, Richard Pryor, Steve Martin, Bill Cosby...there were at least twenty of them. Principal Allens knew something about funny, he knew he had a funny kid. He had decided to take a different approach with Chandler.

"Thank you."

"I know a lot of those probably aren't appropriate for you...so listen with caution. Look, Chandler, you are a funny kid. You will probably grow up to be a very funny adult. There's a time and a place. School isn't the place. Do you like it here?"

"Yes."

"I know you don't like home. So getting suspended from a place you like to spend two weeks at a place you don't like. That doesn't make sense."

"I'm funny."

"You are."

"Am I as funny as these guys? Or John Belushi? Am I as funny as John Belushi?"

"You could be. Although….can I ask you something? Can you tell me about what's going on at home?" Principal Allens asked.

"I'm fine."

"I know divorce can be rough and-"

"I'm fine. I like these albums. I'm gonna listen to them a lot."

"Okay, Go to class," Principal Allens said.

"Thanks," Chandler said as he put the albums in his backpack and practically sprinted out of the office.

He walked into his fourth grade class and took a seat. Since everyone was in alphabetical order, he was always towards the front. As he sat, Dave Bingham tapped him on the elbow.

"Did you really saran wrap the toilets?" Dave asked.

"Yes, I did."

"Wow...that's funny."

"Thank you."

Chandler grinned as he shifted in his seat. He liked being funny. It was a way out. It was a way not to think about what was going on at home and he was thrilled for that and when he got home that day, he did what he normally did, watched movies refusing to let Rick destroy the one thing he knew: funny.

 **May 1979**

Being the secret friend of Rachel Green was tough work. Very tough work. There were rules to being her secret friend. Monica had written those rules down:

 _1\. Do not eat lunch with Rachel at school_

 _2\. Rachel can't invite Monica to her birthday parties_

 _3\. Rachel will celebrate her birthday with Monica the day after or before her birthday party_

 _4\. Rachel will always be included at Monica's birthday_

 _5\. The secret friendship will never be revealed_

Rachel had even signed this contract of sorts and wrote in tiny letters at the bottom of the contract, "I'm sorry". Despite this, it was how their friendship would progress. At school, Monica sat alone, often with a doll or two and would watch as Rachel would sit with Mindy, Sharon and Nancy. She would put on a brave face when the four girls would walk over to her and call her "Monicow" and "Fatso". She grinned when during a dodge ball game in PE in the third grade Nancy screamed, "let's tip the cow" and everyone threw their balls at her, even Rachel. Ross was no help either. Whenever he saw Rachel, he'd stare at her. When Monica told Ross how mean she was, Ross called Monica fat and said that Rachel was the most perfect person ever in the whole entire world. Monica's weight seemed to be increasing with each passing year as well. With every insult thrown her way, a cookie would be the reward. She'd sit in the pantry of her home, eating what she could find and then making sure everything was back in it's place, she'd sneak up to her room and play with her dolls or make friendship bracelets, a skill she had discovered and when Rachel had seen her work, she added a number six to the secret friendship contract:

 _6\. Make Rachel friendship bracelets every week._

Monica's favorite day with Rachel was the day before Rachel's birthday. Monica wasn't invited to Rachel's actual birthday because of the rules so they would sit together in the big pantry of the Geller home, sharing a box of Twinkies and secrets. Monica got to see Rachel for who she actually was, genuinely sweet. It was her favorite part of the secret friendship, she got to see something no one else did. She got to see the real Rachel.

"So guess what?" Rachel asked, taking a bite of a Twinkie. It was 1979 and Rachel's ninth birthday was the next day. The friendship bracelet Monica had made for Rachel hung on Rachel's wrist. Monica's eyes widened as Rachel looked at her.

"What?"

"I played a trick on Amy," Rachel said referring to her twelve year old sister.

"Really? What did you do?" Monica asked. She loved listening to Rachel talk about the pranks she pulled. It was something else she knew about Rachel, but no one else did.

"I filled her bed with nickels," Rachel said as she covered her mouth and giggled. Monica laughed too.

"Why?"

"'Cause it's funny. I put them in the sheets. So they were really heavy and made noise. It was funny."

"That sounds funny."

"We could play a trick on Ross?"

"No, I'd get in trouble," Monica said.

"No."

"Yeah."

"Oh...can I tell you a secret? Promise not to tell?"

"I promise," Monica said as she unwrapped another Twinkie.

"Your brother isn't ugly."

"Ewww, do you like my brother? 'Cause that's like really, super gross."

"No, I don't like your stupid brother. I'm just saying he's not ugly. That is all."

"Ewww, you like my brother. Maybe you'll get married and then...oh, if you got married, we'd be sisters," Monica remarked.

"Monica, we are sisters," Rachel stressed, grabbing another Twinkie and unwrapping it. Monica smiled, although the comment made her feel sad.

"Just secret sisters?" Monica asked.

"Secret sisters. That's so much better than real sisters. I have real sisters and they are so mean. Amy talks on the phone all day and night and-and Jill...she is such a baby that she still sleeps with a night light. When I was her age, I did not sleep with a night light," Rachel said.

"But you were still afraid of the dark," Monica said, remembering her seventh birthday when Rachel had slept over. Rachel had asked if they could sleep with the bathroom light on, it was one of the first secrets that Rachel had ever told Monica...that she was afraid of the dark.

"You don't tell people that," Rachel said.

"Not even your family?"

"No. My mommy and daddy always say that it is best to keep everything you're afraid of inside and never let anyone know."

"Your mommy and daddy say weird things," Monica said. "You told me."

"'Cause I trust you."

Monica smiled as she nodded. Her friendship with Rachel was weird. In private, Rachel revealed her true self. She revealed her fears, her wants, her desires. Monica knew that Rachel loved soap operas, eating Twinkies and could polish off an entire bag of marshmallows on her own. She knew Rachel was afraid of the dark until second grade. She knew Rachel loved to play pranks and watch silly movies. She knew Rachel called her in tears, begging Monica not to hate her after that horrible game of dodge ball where Nancy wanted to play "tip the cow". She knew Rachel loved clothes and would steal her mom's fashion magazines. It was almost like Monica got this secret pass into the secret world of Rachel Green.

"I-I don't like it when people call me a bully," Rachel said, quietly.

Rachel felt like she needed to say something. She knew she was being mean and that was the worst part of all. She knew she wasn't acting fair and she knew people called her a bully. She hated that. Monica looked at her, almost shocked to hear her say that. Maybe that was something Monica didn't know.

"Well, you're a mean person."

"I'm really not," Rachel said.

She hated that Monica thought she was a bully. She just hated that she could not articulate what she wanted to say. Maybe she just was weak. She just wasn't sure.

"The why do you act mean?"

Rachel shrugged as she ate another Twinkie. She wasn't sure why she acted mean. She wasn't sure why she had to act different ways. She just knew she did. Rachel never understood it, even now she regrets so much of how she treated Monica, but at the time she was convinced she was right.

Rachel's birthday was a tea party with all the girls in her fourth grade class except Monica. She hadn't invited Monica. She had her time with Monica the day before. She sat with Sharon, Mindy and Nancy and wore a fake plastic tiara and wore a puffy pink dress.

"Why do you always wear those?" Mindy asked, pointing to the friendship bracelet hanging from her arm. She smiled at it.

"It's a birthday gift," Rachel said.

"Oh, from Monicow," Nancy said.

"Yeah...but it's nice that she makes them," Rachel tried.

"Why are you even friends with her? She's so weird," Nancy said.

"And I heard she and her brother are actually dating," Sharon said.

"Ewww, they're not dating," Rachel said. "And I'm only secret friends with Monica….you know, 'cause like she does stuff and she'll keep your secrets. Don't worry."

"Yeah, but we're your real friends, right?" Sharon asked.

"Yes, you girls are my best friends," Rachel said, although whenever she said that, she felt like it was a lie. She looked around at the party and felt a little sad Monica wasn't there but she just couldn't have her there. She was not welcome and if she did, who knew what those girls would do.

"Rachel?"

Rachel turned away from Mindy, Sharon and Nancy to see Sophie standing nearby in her coat and holding her purse. Sophie motioned for her to come over to her and Rachel let out a sigh. There was always something about Sophie that made her nervous. "I felt like she just knew what a fraud I was," Rachel told me.

"Rachel, I just wanted to say happy birthday and I have to go."

"Why?"

"I have another family."

"Are you going forever?"

"No, no...I'll still be here but I have another family I'm going to work for. In Scarsdale."

"Where's that?"

"Not too far. But there's a little boy who needs someone to take care of him too. He doesn't have any brothers or sisters and according to his mom, he's lonely too."

"That's sad."

"Yeah...hey, where's Monica?"

Rachel looked down at her hands and back up at Sophie. She wanted to cry as the woman looked down at her.

"I-I didn't-I saw her yesterday but...the girls are mean to her and-and-she wouldn't have fun and-I'm not lonely."

"I know."

"I'm not a bully," Rachel managed to squeak out.

"I know you're not."

"Do you hate me? That's why you're leaving?"

"No, oh, no...sweetie. I don't. I actually think you're better than all these kids," Sophie said, lifting Rachel's chin up towards her as Sophie knelt down to look at her. Rachel's eyes started to tear up as Sophie let out a laugh. Even at nine, she was gaining a reputation.

"My little crier."

"I can't help it," Rachel said.

"You're going to be okay. But...you might be too young to understand this now, but...hang on to Monica. She's the kind of friend the matters."

"What?" Rachel asked, sniffling.

"You'll get it when you're older. I'll be back, I'm doing part time over in Scarsdale and part time here."

"Okay," Rachel said as she gave Sophie a hug and watched as she walked out the door to that little boy in Scarsdale. She still felt like crying as she walked into the kitchen where her mom was getting cookies and sandwiches ready.

"Why are you crying?" Sandra asked.

"I didn't invite Monica. I was bad again. I didn't invite her."

"I thought you said she couldn't come," Sandra said walking towards her and kneeling down before her as she cried.

"No. I didn't invite her."

"We invited every girl in your fourth grade class except for one person?"

"Yes," Rachel said as she continued crying.

"Rachel."

"The girls are mean to her."

"I'm calling Judy," Sandra said as she walked over to the phone and dialed it.

Rachel stood crying in the middle of the kitchen as she listened to her mother explain everything.

"So, we are very sorry. Rachel had told me that she had invited everyone and I didn't know Monica had not been included and we would love it if she came by," Sandra said.

On Judy's end, she was getting annoyed. She looked over at Monica who was flipping through the Modern Gelatine Cookery, a book of gelatine recipes. She was crinkling her nose at a picture of gelatin fish. Judy laughed at the look on Monica's face as she thought about what to do next. Monica was happy. She didn't want to ruin that. Judy turned back to the phone and took a deep breath.

"You know, Sandra. Thank you for the invitation but Monica is very busy today. Wish Rachel a very happy birthday. She'll see Rachel on Monday," Judy hung up and looked over at Monica who was now staring at her.

"What was that?" Monica asked.

"My daughter doesn't get last minute invitations to parties," Judy said, sitting across from her.

"Rachel's birthday?"

"Yeah. You know, honey….Rachel's not the only other girl in your class, is she?"

"No."

"Maybe we need to think of other friends. How about today, you and me? Manis and pedis."

"With you?"

"Yes."

"Okay and I don't wanna make this," Monica said, pointing at the fish lying comfortably in a jello mold.

"We won't….but I can teach you how to make macarons."

"I've been wanting to do that for months."

"I know, but it's hard."

"I can do it."

"I know, come on," Judy said.

Monica closed the book and followed her mother out the door. Rachel could have her birthday parties where she couldn't invite Monica. She kinda liked the idea that she would get to make macarons. She wouldn't tell Rachel so that way she would not have to share them.

Back at Rachel's house, Sandra was staring at Rachel who was still crying. She knew why Judy wouldn't let Monica come by. If the situation was reversed, she probably would have done the same. She looked back at Rachel.

"You know….why are you crying? You're the one who made choice. You can't cry if you made the choice."

"I'm not a bully," Rachel sad.

"Then you have to stop acting like one. What you did to Monica was mean. Go enjoy your party. I'm gonna get these sandwiches ready."

"Are you gonna tell daddy?"

"I don't know. Probably."

"No, please don't. I don't wanna get a spanking."

"Then learn to behave better."

"I don't-I didn't do it."

"Go to your party. We're going to deal with this after," Sandra said.

Rachel sniffled as she walked out towards the party. Sandra let out a sigh. She knew exactly why Rachel was acting the way she was. She knew she wanted to follow the crowd but it just didn't matter. Rachel was quiet for the rest of her birthday. When it was over, she went straight to her room and sat on her bed, waiting. Soon, her father stood in the doorway with a furious look.

"Get over here, right now Rachel."

"No."

"Rachel."

"No. No. I didn't do it. It wasn't me. Please. I'm not lying."

"Get over here, right now."

Rachel began crying as Leonard walked towards her and put her over his knee. She was crying as he began spanking her. She continued to cry. They didn't get it. No one got it. No one understood.

 **Joey**

 **July 1979**

July 4th weekend, middle of summer. Joey was spending it on the dirt bike trails of Cunningham Park. He going up and down the little mountains of dirt, riding along until he found one. He really wasn't supposed to try it. It was too big and he wasn't experienced enough but standing there, looking up, he could not resist. He was eleven. He was going into sixth grade, he was ready. He began peddling his bike, faster and faster. He could feel the wind smacking him in the face, although it was hot wind and it smelled like farts. He rode and was soon flying, although not the way he wanted. He began tumbling down the dirt hill, rolling and rolling until he landed in a dirty heap on the ground.

"Nice fall, princess," Tony said from above him.

Joey groaned as he opened his eyes, brushing the sweat and dirt from his face. He spit some dirt out of his mouth as Tony pulled him up.

"Ugh," Joey groaned.

"You okay, kid," Tony said.

"Got a helmet," Joey grinning pointed at the helmet on his head.

"Yeah, but you already got brain damage. How will we be able to tell if it's gotten worse?"

"Fuck off," Joey muttered.

"Right after you, princess. Hey, I need a ride."

"To?"

"Poker game."

"I can't drive."

"Not my problem."

"It is if you want me to drive. How did you find me anyway?" Joey asked.

"Took a wild guess. Come on, dipshit."

"Why can't you drive?"

"Been drinking."

"Okay," Joey said although he wasn't quite sure of the logic behind that but he didn't care. He grabbed his bike and followed Tony towards his car. He hopped in the driver's seat of Tony's car while Tony hopped in the passenger's seat. He grabbed a beer and cracked it open as Joey moved the seat forward.

"You're short, princess," Tony said.

"I'm eleven dipshit."

"Okay, keys….you drive," Tony said.

Joey turned on the ignition and after a few missteps, finally figured out the differences between the brake and the gas and began to head down the road with Tony instructing him.

"You drive slow, man, it's like you're a fucking ass grandma," Tony said.

"Hey, you get what you pay for."

"I'm not paying you jackshit."

"Exactly."

"Why are you still wearing your helmet?" Tony asked.

"In case we crash," Joey said.

"You're an idiot. Turn left."

"But okay-"

"Change lanes until you're where that arrow with the left turn is."

"Okay."

Joey did as told. He kinda loved how easy it was for him to drive. It was like it came naturally for him. He was quite good at it. Sure there were several close calls and they almost got busted by the cops when Tony threw his beer bottle out the window but he got Tony to his destination. He felt quite adult. He would tell Christopher of course that he got to drive and not only that, he got to drive Tony's car. That meant something. That meant Tony trusted him. That meant everything. Once he parked the car, he entered a new world with poker players. He sat with Tony, even learned how to play a few hands. He felt completely like he was being let into a secret club. He was being accepted. After the game, he headed back. His family was having a July Fourth barbecue as he rode his bike down the street and towards Kristi.

"Where were you? Your mom is looking for you."

"I drove a car and played poker….Tony let me drive his car and I got to play poker now."

"Awww, he loves you."

"Oh, it was a good day," Joey grinned. "I need hot dogs."

Kristi laughed as the two walked in the house to get some food. He didn't tell his parents where he really was, he wasn't stupid but there was something about driving with Tony that made him feel like he had an in. He was going to be joining his world. He could not wait to be done with school so he could officially be part of Tony's crew.


	9. Chapter 9

**October 1979**

Having your birthday in October often posed a problem, mainly where the weather was concerned. It was always starting to get cold around Ross' birthday so outside activities at Adventureland or other places were often out but when his parents suggested the Long Island Aquarium and Exhibition Center, he was thrilled with the idea. He invited his entire fifth grade class because that's what you did. He didn't really care if kids showed up. He was happy that Will and Jonathan did and Rachel did too. Rachel Green came because Jack and Judy said that Monica could bring a friend and it was shocking that Rachel said yes. "I said yes out of guilt. I still felt so bad about what happened at my birthday so when Monica asked me to hang out with her at Ross' I said yes." Ross was just thrilled she had shown up. "I think I may have liked her even then but I wasn't really aware of it," he told me. He was completely freaked out as he cautiously approached her at his birthday. She stood by the butterfly exhibit, watching them flutter about. She was standing by herself as Monica was sitting at a table nearby with some of his classmates eating pizza.

"Did you know that there are over 180,000 known species of butterflies and moths and they have tiny microscopic scales covering their wings and body. They can also be found on every continent except Antarctica," Ross explained.

"What?" Rachel asked.

"Never mind. You wanna see sharks?"

"I like butterflies. They're so pretty. They're in their cocoons and then they finally bust open and it's...it's just...they're free. It must be nice," Rachel said.

Butterflies were and are still her favorite. She could identify with a butterfly, with a caterpillar. "I spent so long in a cocoon just waiting for that moment, wanting so badly to just be who I was supposed to be, who I knew I was...but I couldn't. I just couldn't break out," Rachel explained.

"Yeah, but they only live for like a few weeks," Ross said.

"Then what?"

"I-they die."

"Oh," Rachel said.

Even now that interaction makes her laugh. "In retrospect, it was so cute and it's still an inside joke between us. What happens to the butterflies? Well, they die." Rachel laughed remembering that moment.

"Sorry," Ross said.

"It's okay," Rachel said.

"I'm happy you came to my birthday."

"Well, none of my friends are here," Rachel said.

"Monica's here."

"But…it's different," Rachel said. "I mean, I can be here because I can say my parents made me."

"Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why would you say that?" Ross asked.

"'Cause….I have to."

"That's sad," Ross said.

"No, it's not."

"Well, you can be like the butterflies and leave your cocoon."

"No, I can't," Rachel said as she stepped back, "I'm gonna go look at the sharks."

Rachel left him to go look at the sharks. That interaction, she remembered, also terrified her. Ross, like Sophie, seemed to know. Ross knew she was a fake. It made her scared that people could see right through her but they didn't get it. Ross and Monica, they felt so comfortable just being who they were. She didn't. She wasn't. She was a shark, not a butterfly or she would figure out a way to become a shark.

Ross watched as Rachel disappeared and turned to look at the butterflies. He kept staring at them, not even noticing Jonathan and Will suddenly appearing on either side of him.

"Do you like Rachel Green?" Jonathan asked.

"No. She's just….she's...she's Two-Face. Like in our comic book," Ross said. He had been working on that comic book for three years, ever since the idea had come to him. He had worked with Jonathan and Will on it and they had written and rewritten it. It had become a series for those three boys. Two-Face was a girl who put on one face to show the world. She was a villain, a mean person who spit on people and kicked puppies but secretly, she fought crime. She saved drowning babies and took care of the poor and sick. She kept her identity secret. She wore a green jumpsuit and cat ears and a butterfly mask when fighting crime.

"Two-Face. Fights crimes by night and kicks puppies by day," Will said, as he karate chopped the air.

"You should show her the comic books," Jonathan said.

"That's not a good idea," Ross said.

"I keep saying we need to move on from Two-Face and concentrate Science Boy," Will said, referring to the other comic they were working on. Science Boy was a kid who did science experiments that would help solve the problems of the world.

"What if we do a Two-Face Science Boy crossover?" Jonathan asked.

"That would be cool. I bet they would make a good team," Ross mused.

"No, no, Two-Face is evil. She can't love anyone because if she does she'll die," Wil said.

"Hmmm, maybe Science Boy could be her kryptonite," Ross said.

"No, this is going to a gross direction," Will said.

Ross laughed as the three boys continued to explore the museum and discuss their comics in depth. Jonathan and Ross were particularly interested in brainstorming the Two Face-Science Boy Crossover. Will was disgusted by the idea, but Jonathan and Ross liked the idea. Science Boy was the only one that could see through Two Face's cover. He saw Two-Face as tender-hearted and sweet, but he was the only one who could tell. Two-Face had built a very strong shield around her that no one else could break through.

I feel the need now to extol my love of the Science Boy series. It's hugely popular now and each one of the characters represents a member of The Six. You should buy one. Two Face is in there and that is indeed Rachel. She loves it though, doesn't mind it at all. "I was two faced. I mean, that's just….it," Rachel said. Although she does disagree with anything that has her kicking a puppy.

 **Phoebe**

 **October 1979**

Halloween. She was eleven years old now and she and her friends thought maybe this would be their last year of fully doing Halloween. Although Barry disagreed as the foursome fiercely debated this topic in the tree house fort in Barry's backyard.

"Who says middle schoolers cannot trick or treat?" Barry asked. "Just 'cause we're going to seventh grade next year, doesn't mean we can't get free candy."

"I mean it kinda does. Adam will get more candy 'cause he's younger," Leslie said.

"That's not fair," Barry said. "I'll take it and beat him with it."

"Okay, okay….let's plan. I think I wanna be Marilyn Monroe," Brad mused.

"Who?" Barry asked.

"Oh, you poor thing. You need to watch a movie," Brad said.

"I think I wanna be...Farrah Fawcett," Leslie said.

"I'm gonna be-"

"Not a Philadelphia Flyer," Phoebe interrupting Barry.

"I am insulted," Barry said.

"Don't be. You've been a Philadelphia Flyer since I've known you since….since kindergarten," Phoebe said.

"Alright, alright, I'll be a rapper. Call me Big Tasty," Barry said.

"Why would we call you that?" Brad asked.

"'Cause I'm tasty," Barry said.

"I don't even know how to respond to that," Brad said.

"I don't think we need to," Leslie said.

"What are you gonna be, Pheebs?" Barry asked.

"I don't know. I have to think this over. I have to make a list….so many options. Cartoon character or wait….or maybe….maybe I can make up my own character like, like….a dumb blonde who invented Post-its or-or-a bad therapist and I can just give out the worst advice to people or I could be a washed up actress who's trying make a comeback….I have stories," Phoebe said.

"How do you make Post-its?" Barry asked.

"Well, okay, when you make glue first you need to thermoset your resin after it cools you have to mix in an epoxide, which is really just a fancy name for any simple oxygenated adhesive, so then you could raise the viscosity by adding a complex glucose derivative during the emulsification process," Phoebe said.

"What the hell did you just say?" Barry asked.

"I have no idea," Phoebe said.

"I bought it," Brad said.

"Oh and after, my mom and step-dad said we could hang out at their house," Leslie said which was met by a chorus of no's from Phoebe, Brad and Barry.

"Why no?" Leslie asked.

"Honey, you know I love you but your dad is creepy as freak," Brad said.

"Fuck, say fuck," Barry said.

"I'm classy," Brad said.

"My step-dad is not creepy," Leslie said.

"Remember what happen when we were seven? I slept over and he climbed into bed and pressed himself up against me and the worst part was he called me Ursula," Phoebe said.

"How is that the worst part?" Barry asked.

"Well, if you're gonna be creepy and weird, at least get my name right," Phoebe said.

"Good point," Barry said.

"Okay, so he's a little touchy feely. Barry's mom hugs everyone," Leslie said.

"Not the same thing," Barry said.

"Yeah, honey, no...Barry's mom a smother, your step-dad is a sexual assaulter. Totally different,"

"Let's discuss our costumes, I don't want to talk about this," Leslie said.

The four continued planning. They were going to make this last Halloween the best Halloween ever. They'd get tons of candy, sort it all out, trade. They would hang out at Barry's house, perhaps steal some of Adam's candy. It would be simply the most amazing Halloween and their final one before middle school.

She practically ran home, excited and thrilled about these Halloween costumes. It was going to be the most perfect night with her friends. Jeff was sitting at the table, looking through a stack of bills. She was shocked to see her mom was actually downstairs.

"Mom, you're out of bed," Phoebe said.

"Yeah, the doctors are trying new medication," Lily said.

"Doctors….they just want to rip you off," Jeff said.

"I have wonderful news. I'm gonna go trick or treating. Barry, Leslie, Brad and I are gonna celebrate our last Halloween as kids," Phoebe said.

"That's lame," Ursula said.

Phoebe turned to see Ursula standing behind here. She had come downstairs to see if there was something to eat in the house.

"Ursula, you should come. Twin costumes."

"No, I'm not hanging out with you and your friends."

"Come on, Barry is coming and you like Barry. You have a crush on him."

"I do not, take it back."

"Everyone knows….except Barry."

"I do not...well, Deanna is having a party and invited me and I'd bring you along but she thinks you're weird," Ursula said.

"Ursula," Jeff said.

"Whatever, I don't care. Can I get a Halloween costume?" Phoebe asked.

"Oh, those are like sixty dollars….I don't know. We just had to pay our electric bill. I wanted to buy some food. We don't have any food," Jeff said.

"We have no food?" Ursula asked.

Ursula walked towards the fridge and opened it up, sure enough, it was empty. Phoebe could feel her heart sink.

"Why do we not have food? This is ridiculous," Ursula said, her voice starting to rise.

"Ursula-" Jeff said.

"No, Jeff….this...why did you have children if you can't afford to take care of us," Ursula said.

"We're gonna buy food," Lily said.

"I'm out of here. I'm going to Penny's house. She always has fried chicken," Ursula said as she walked out of the house, slamming the door shut behind her. Phoebe looked over at her mom as she began to cry.

"I hate this. I fucked everything up. All I wanted was to give them a life and I've given them nothing," Lily said.

"Mom...um...I'll go talk to Ursula and I'll make my own costume, it's okay," Phoebe said.

Phoebe turned and ran out of the house. She could see Ursula way up ahead walking towards the end of the street. She ran off towards Ursula, racing as fast as she could, flailing her arms and yelling Ursula's name. Ursula stopped and stared at her.

"You look and sound like a freak," Ursula said.

"You got to leave her alone," Phoebe said, "you can't yell like that. You know it upsets mom."

"I don't really care. I mean, yes I do...but….but Pheebs, doesn't it kill you? 'Cause it kills me when I go over to Penny and Deanna's homes and they have electricity and food. I mean…"

"It sucks but-"

"And mom's…."

"She'll get better. She's downstairs."

"She's still in her pajamas at four o'clock. On a work day...so why can't she get a job?"

"Disability."

"Why did she even have us? Look...I'm hungry. I'm gonna walk over to Penny's. I'll bring you some stuff."

"I don't eat fried chicken," Phoebe said.

"They have other stuff," Ursula said.

With that Ursula walked off and Phoebe was standing alone on the street. She had wanted her own Halloween costume. Maybe she could make one instead? She turned and walked back towards her house, her dreams of that final trick or treating extravaganza slipping away.

"Pheebs, you alright?" Leslie asked.

She looked up and noticed Leslie riding her bike towards her. She stopped and waited for Leslie to reach her.

"Yeah, I'm just….I hate being poor."

"Could be worse, could be homeless," Leslie said.

"True," Phoebe said.

"Hey, my step dad isn't that bad," Leslie said. "He's just-"

"It's fine, Leslie. I'm gonna go home. I have to figure out something for my Halloween costume."

"Can't wait….I'm off to the store to buy mine. You wanna come? I'll buy."

"No, thank you."

Phoebe let out a sigh as she walked towards her house. She hated being poor. She hated being the neighborhood charity case. Everyone always felt bad for them, giving them food, everything. She felt like everyone in their neighborhood pitied them. Everyone in other people's neighborhoods pitied them.

The day of Halloween and Phoebe still had no costume. She was staring at her closet, trying to think of something but nothing was coming to mind.

"Pheebs," Jeff said as he entered her room. Phoebe turned to look at him carrying a plastic bag.

"What? What did you get?"

Jeff pulled out a Miss Piggy costume. Phoebe's mouth dropped. The Muppets were incredibly popular. The costume must have cost a lot.

"For my girl, Happy Halloween."

"Oh my G-d….Jeff, where did you-what-"

"Don't worry about it. I-I made some sales. I told you I got the new sales job."

"Oh, yeah….thank you," Phoebe said.

She never really asked what kind of sales job, just that it was a sales job and she had a costume. She would be able to enjoy her final trick or treating outing. She got dressed, met up with Leslie who was Judy Jetson, Barry who decided on a Mad Scientist and Brad who was Marilyn Monroe as promised. She loved her little foursome. They walked up and down streets, getting as much candy as they could. It was one of those moments Phoebe even now recalls as one of the most happiest moments. "It was just one of those moments," she told me over drinks in the midst of her Nashville bar, "where you look back at what's going to happen next and you wish you could have known. You wish you could have just bottled up that moment."

Barry, Brad, Leslie and Phoebe ended up in the tree house fort in Barry's backyard, exchanging candy. She had never eaten that much candy in her entire life. She felt sick but good sick, the sick that comes from eating almost a pound of individual wrapped chocolate bars. The other three were right there with her. She wanted the rest of her life to be like that, to be that perfect.

 **November 1979**

Thanksgiving involved the Geller Bowl. Ross loved it even though he and Monica would get insanely competitive with each other. His family played touch football and he and Monica were on opposite sides and they would play. It was hard, fast and wild and there was a trophy involved, teams, everything. Ross was picking on her a lot that day, telling her she was too fat to be on anyone's team. He had said it in front of their parents, yet they seemed to ignore it. Monica was getting mad and as the game began, she kept getting madder. It wasn't just Ross that was being mean, it was all of her cousins. The adults seemed oblivious. Maybe he should not have said what he said to her, but they were in the game. The ball was in play and he was being competitive. Monica grabbed the ball, he oinked at her and she lifted her arm and suddenly he could feel the crunch. Monica had elbowed him in the nose. He grabbed his nose and looked up as Judy grabbed Monica by the arm and began spanking her. Ross winced as Monica was crying. She hadn't even noticed what she had done, just that Ross looked like he was in pain and she was getting in trouble.

"Stop, stop," Monica cried.

"You broke your brother's nose," Judy said as she continued to spank Monica in front of the entire family.

"He said oink, oink," Monica said as Judy finally stopped spanking her and turned her around to glare at her.

"Don't lie to me. I am not in the mood. You have ruined Thanksgiving," Judy said.

"He was being mean," Monica cried as she rubbed her bottom. She could hear her cousins giggling and pointing.

"Let's go...to your room," Judy said as she grabbed Monica's arm and dragged her off. Ross was watching, holding on to his nose.

"Way to go, fatty," Ross muttered.

"Mom, Ross called me fat," Monica said.

"You broke his nose," Judy said as she pulled Monica into the house and sat Monica in a chair that was facing the wall.

"This isn't fair," Monica said.

"You are to stay in this room and not come out. We have to now take your brother to the hospital," Judy said as she walked out of Monica's room, slamming the door shut behind her. Outside, Jack was comforting Ross as he placed his hand on Ross' shoulder.

"Let's take you to the hospital," Jack said, "and you need to be nicer to your sister."

"She broke my nose."

"Did you oink at her?"

"We were playing a game."

"Let's go," Jack said as he led Ross off towards the car. Monica kept crying as she stared at the wall. Soon, she wore herself out with crying and got up. She walked towards her bed and peered under it, grabbing a large Hershey bar. She slowly unwrapped it, taking a bite. It helped, made her stop crying. No one understood. It seemed obvious. She would always be a secret. She sat on her bed, staring out the window, tears falling again. She was Rachel's secret friend. Even her parents seemed to want to keep her a secret. As she was staring out the window, she thought of the Geller Bowl Trophy. She wanted that trophy. It was hers. If she was to be a secret, then she'd secretly take a prize. She finished off the Hershey bar and slowly opened her door. She snuck out of her room and tiptoed towards her parents' room. She could hear her family laughing downstairs. She paid no intention. She was a secret, invisible. The Geller Bowl Trophy was sitting on her dad's side of the bed. He had said something about throwing it away, but she would get it. She grabbed it and tiptoed back to her room, hiding it under her bed. She grabbed another Hershey bar and unwrapped it, eating it. She was still hungry. She tiptoed back downstairs. Her family was watching a game so she walked into the kitchen. All of that food.

She ate cranberry sauce, stuffing, pie, turkey, more pie, sweet potatoes...she wondered why no one was coming in the kitchen. She could hear them laughing, yelling and she kept eating and eating, going as fast as she could, not stopping just in case but everyone seemed preoccupied. Soon there was barely anything left as she snuck back upstairs to the bathroom and threw up. She could taste it again, all the Thanksgiving dinner. It was then she realized something else. All the food was gone. She had eaten it all. She walked back into her room, knowing she was in a lot of trouble. She sat and waited until the moment her parents walked into her room.

"Monica, where is all the food?" Judy asked.

Both Jack and Judy were staring at her, both looking quite angry at her and she curled up against her bed.

"I ate it."

"What did you do after you ate it?" Judy asked, her heart dropping to her stomach.

"What?" Jack asked, he was confused by this.

"She's been throwing up food, Jack," Judy said.

"What? When? Why didn't you tell me?" Jack asked.

"Where's the food?" Judy asked, walking towards her bed and sitting next to her.

"I threw up."

"Harmonica," Jack said.

The anger both parents felt faded away almost immediately. Monica was too young, yes she was heavier than the other kids and the Thanksgiving food was completely gone but this, they needed to fix this but they weren't sure how.

"No, if I throw it up and I get thin then Rachel will wanna be my friend in public. It's not fair. It's just not fair," Monica said as she began crying. Judy pulled Monica into her arms and held her, she began crying as well. She couldn't help it.

"Harmonica, you can't do that. It's not good for you," Jack said.

"And if Rachel Green doesn't want to be your friend in public, it's her loss," Judy said.

"I'm sorry. I just want people to like me," Monica was sobbing as Jack and Judy tried to comfort her. That Thanksgiving, they ordered pizzas instead and no one said anything about what happened to the food. Jack and Judy made up excuses, they said that they had been snacking on it, that it had gotten cold, that it was ruined because of the game. Monica still felt sad though. She felt guilty. She hated being so invisible and when she threw up, people noticed.

 **December 1979**

Ross was still angry. He wanted to get back at Monica for breaking his nose. She was so competitive and he also thought something was strange about the fact that all the Thanksgiving food was gone when he got back from the hospital but no one would say a word to him. He got his opportunity during Hanukkah. Monica had gotten an Easy Bake Oven for Hanukkah and Ross decided to play a joke. He took the halogen light bulbs from the lamps and found Monica waiting impatiently for the brownies she was making to heat up.

"You know, I read somewhere that halogen lights make things bake faster," Ross said as he walked into the living room.

"Really?" Monica asked. She wasn't sure what he meant or exactly what halogen was, but Ross was always reading science books. So maybe he knew.

"Let me help you."

"You forgive me for breaking your nose?" Monica asked.

"You're my sister. Let me replace the bulbs for you," Ross said as he replaced them for her. She was amazed that he was doing something for her. Maybe things would change in 1980. Maybe he would be a nicer brother. Ross grinned at her and walked out of the room. Monica stood back and waited while the brownies baked. Soon though, she smelled smoke and suddenly the entire Easy Bake Oven burst into flames. She screamed when Judy and Jack raced into the living room to see the Easy Bake on fire. Jack ran to get the fire extinguisher as Judy grabbed Monica's arm. Jack ran back with the fire extinguisher and extinguished the fire. Monica was breathing heavily as she stared at the wreckage of her Easy Bake oven.

"What happened?" Judy asked as Jack leaned in closer to inspect what had gone wrong when he stepped back and walked towards the lamps with the halogen light bulbs. He looked in each lamp and then turned to look at them.

"She changed the bulbs," Jack said, looking angry which scared Monica. She had never seen her dad get angry at her. It was usually her mom who did the disciplining.

"You did what?" Judy asked.

"No, no, Ross did," Monica said, "he changed the bulbs...he did it, not me. Please believe me."

"Let's go," Jack walked towards Monica and grabbed her arm. Monica was terrified, sobbing as her dad pulled her upstairs to her room. At the top of the stairs, Monica saw Ross, laughing but it was a nervous laughter. He hadn't thought it would go that far and it freaked him out. He knew he had gone too far but there wasn't anything he could do about it now.

"Ross did it," Monica cried as Jack pulled Monica into her room and pulled her over his knee where he began to smack her bottom. Monica was in hysterics. "It wasn't me."

"Stop lying."

"No, daddy. Please."

Monica was sobbing as her dad spanked her. Her dad never spanked her. This wasn't her fault, this was Ross'. Yet as it always seemed, no one believed her. Soon, her dad was done spanking her and led her to the chair facing the wall.

"You need to start behaving yourself. You almost burned down the house. You are not to come out of this room," Jack said, sounding angry as he stormed out of the room. She sniffled as she stared at the wall.

"It's not my fault," she cried to the wall. "It's not my fault."

She took a deep breath and walked towards her bed, grabbing the box with the candy bars. She grabbed another Hershey bar and unwrapped it. As she ate, her crying subsided and she began to feel a bit better although no one did get her. She soon fell asleep on her bed, surrounded by Hershey bar wrappers. She dreamt of being a grownup, of moving away. She dreamt of being with someone who did not want to keep her a secret. Someone who believed her that Ross was evil.

That night, Ross was sitting in his room when his parents walked in and closed the door behind them. His breath got caught in his throat and he had a feeling it wasn't good news.

"Ross, can we talk to you?" Jack asked.

"What?" Ross asked.

"Honey, did you put the halogen lights in Monica's Easy Bake?" Judy asked.

"No, Monica did."

"How did she know if you put halogen lights in the Easy Bake Oven, it would burn faster?" Jack asked.

"I don't know, but she did it."

"I don't think she did, honey. I think she had help," Judy said.

It had been a discussion after the fact. Maybe they had acted too quickly but it just did not seem like something Monica would do. Jack and Judy had talked and came to a realization that perhaps this time they punished the wrong child.

"Did you try to get back at her for breaking your nose?" Jack asked.

"No. No, it wasn't me. It was Monica," Ross said, but he could not look at his parents. He couldn't lie to their faces. He remained seated and began to feel scared. He knew he had gone too far.

"Are you lying?" Jack asked.

"Yes," Ross admitted, "I'm sorry."

"Okay, we are taking your allowance for two months," Jack said.

"She broke my nose and she ate all the Thanksgiving dinner," Ross whined.

"Ross," Jack said.

"No, it's not my fault she's a fat ass," Ross said.

"That's enough," Judy said.

"No, she ate all the food at Thanksgiving and you're covering for her and she-"

"You were also nasty to her. Do not say another word. Do not say anything about her weight, do not-" Jack said.

"She broke my nose because she's fat. She doesn't deserve an Easy Bake," Ross said.

Jack stood up and walked over to Ross and grabbed his arm, pulling him towards the bed. Ross was starting to get a little nervous as his dad began to spank him. He never got a spanking, only Monica.

"No, no...Monica gets spankings, not me," Ross said as his father continued to spank him. "I don't get spankings, only Monica."

His father continued to spank him and Ross began crying. They had the wrong child. He didn't get in trouble. He was the good child. Monica was the evil one who broke people's noses and ruined Thanksgiving. When his dad was done, both Jack and Judy got up and walked towards the door. They were still angry.

"We are taking the money from your allowance and buying Monica another Easy Bake Oven," Jack said.

"Honey, you can't do that. You almost burned the house down and then blamed your sister? Your sister needs you to protect her. She needs you to guide her," Judy said as they walked out of his room and into their room.

"What do we do?" Jack asked as they shut the door behind him.

"I don't know. Do we tell Ross what Monica was doing?" Judy asked.

"No and I...I will buy her another Easy Bake. I'll go now."

"The stores aren't open."

"Early tomorrow," Jack said.

"What are we going to do about the throwing up? That scares me, Jack. She's too young," Judy said.

"I don't know...but I'm gonna buy her the most expensive Easy Bake there is."

"I need to buy her some more cookbooks. Are we doing the right thing? She is at an unhealthy weight...but...I...maybe there's a camp that can help with good eating habits?"

"Like a fat camp?" Jack asked.

"I don't know. I just want her to be okay.

"She will be. She's our Harmonica."

Judy smiled as Jack leaned in to kiss her. Judy fell back onto the bed, nervous. It scared her. It scared her that Ross was being mean, that Rachel was being mean. It scared her that she got mad at Monica. She just felt at a loss and so did Jack. He didn't realize how serious it had all become. Maybe that's why he had jumped the gun in punishing her, he wasn't sure but both Geller parents felt guilty and were starting to feel at a loss.

Ross was pissed. He didn't understand why he had to keep protecting Monica? Monica was breaking him and could be mean and she was constantly being friends with Rachel who was never nice. As far as Ross was concerned, Monica was bringing this all on herself. He sat there stewing, getting more and more angry so he waited until everyone was asleep. He got up and snuck downstairs towards the garage. He grabbed a couple pencils from the counter and stepped in the garage near Monica's bike. In the dark, he stuck pencils in spokes and began to play with the brakes. Monica could never go that far on her bike. She was much too heavy. So he figured the worst that would happen would be she just wouldn't be able to go or go far. Sure they really could not ride their bikes too far because of the snow but he was pretty sure it would pay off in his favor.

The end of the seventies...

I'm moving into the eighties now. A separate book, a separate set of adventures. Please follow me and I appear in that story. Kind of. Well, really, not until the end but I am there. Technically. I mean, I don't really say anything but I am there. This group amazes me, a friendship this strong and I love how open everyone was with me. Most everyone. The Six though, they decided together that nothing would be off limits. Before I began this, The Six had a long email meeting and made a decision that they would put everything out there, warts and all. I love that even now they continue to have an all for one and one for all attitude. The do things as a team.


End file.
